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AIBU?

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To think I’m not becoming an alcoholic

39 replies

Scarysnakes · 02/06/2024 13:31

As DH seems to think so. I don’t drink everyday. In fact there’s been times I’ve gone months without a drop. If someone said to me “you can never drink alcohol again” I wouldn’t be bothered (ok maybe a little) I tend to only drink in social occasions which isn’t very regularly anyway.

The only reason he thinks this is because whenever things get a bit stressful I tend to turn to a drink and then once I start I find it hard to stop. Last weekend I was so stressed I had a few drinks at home then was sad I had no more in the house so I went to the shop and bought more. I don’t think this is a problem I am just letting my hair down once in a while.

My brother is a functioning alcoholic so I don’t think this helps DH thinking pattern

OP posts:
theemmadilemma · 02/06/2024 14:28

It's not a healthy coping mechanism. What happens in periods of long term stress?

OfDragonsDeep · 02/06/2024 14:14

When someone else (that you trust and respect) flags an issue with your alcohol consumption, listen to them.

Coolblur · 02/06/2024 14:11

Being an alcoholic is not about the volume you drink or even how often, it's about why you drink. Using alcohol to destress is how many become alcoholics. But you've recognised that you do that, so take steps to avoid doing so in future. Maybe go for a walk or to the gym instead. It might sound ridiculous when you don't yet have a major problem, but if you don't do something, it could be a slippery slope.
Also, remember your relationship with alcohol will be slightly skewed because you have a close family member who has a drink problem. You already know too much to pretend to yourself that you don't know what it can do to a person.

cakecoffeecakecoffee · 02/06/2024 13:59

It sounds like alcohol abuse rather than alcohol dependency, though both come under the umbrella of alcoholism.

if it’s causing concern then you need to take that seriously.

MakeTheFriendshipBracelets · 02/06/2024 13:54

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Marblessolveeverything · 02/06/2024 13:52

You have a dysfunctional relationship with alcohol. Your family is impacted already so this raises your risk.

I really think you need to engage with some support because life is stressful and adding in alcoholism won't make life easier.

I would want my partner to want to give up drink in your situation.

Chely · 02/06/2024 13:42

Not alcoholic but slippery slope.
I can be the same when in a depressed state, easier to drink too much than deal with the root cause. I've also done years tee-total, doesn't mean you are not vulnerable to developing a problem.

Technonan · 02/06/2024 13:41

I think that finding it hard to stop once you've started is a cause for concern - it suggests a vulnerability, not that you are an alcoholic. I'd be cautious, and avoid alcohol as a stress buster.

pasturesgreen · 02/06/2024 13:41

Whenever things get a bit stressful I tend to turn to a drink and then once I start I find it hard to stop. Last weekend I was so stressed I had a few drinks at home then was sad I had no more in the house so I went to the shop and bought more

Red flag. Coupled with your family history around alcohol, I can see why your DH is worried. I'd try and take on board his concerns.

lljkk · 02/06/2024 13:41

well.... you are describing a kind of emotional dependency.

Do you put yourself, property or others at risk when you binge drink?

Chirawehaha · 02/06/2024 13:38

How much are you drinking and how often? You’ve kept that bit rather vague!

Itsthedress · 02/06/2024 13:36

Not yet, but I think your current relationship with alcohol makes you potentially vulnerable to becoming one, I’d look for other ways to cope with stress, and make it a household rule that when there is no more drink in the house the drinking has finished. Get used to managing that feeling.

Changingplace · 02/06/2024 13:35

Depends if you can’t stop every single time you drink and what level of drunk you get to, on just your description I’d say no but it depends whether that was, finished the wine so got one more bottle or finished 4 bottles so bought a bottle of vodka and polished that off too (obvs exaggerating!!).

Impossible to really say without more info.

ilovesooty · 02/06/2024 13:35

You're in danger of developing a dependency. I think your husband is understandably concerned.

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