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Original poster

To dislike it when men post on mumsnet?

406 replies

N225NNW · 02/06/2024 07:52

I find it annoying. Why can’t they use their own men’s websites? Of which there are many!

*Note I put a thread up like this last night. Then went to bed. When I woke up this morning, it had been deleted by MN. Not sure what went on there..

OP posts:
Didimum · 02/06/2024 08:49

Personally I think some of the women on here are far more problematic and derogatory to other posters.

bluetopazlove · 02/06/2024 08:49

I don't really bother to be honest ,why do I need an introduction to decide whether their opinion is valid to me ? I don't need I'm male/female ,black/white or gay straight .

blue345 · 02/06/2024 08:48

Man here = not claiming any ownership of a female perspective, offering this thought up, but it would be useful for you to know it's from the male angle as that could be relevant to how useful or not it is.

This. I see it as respectful and not wanting to deceive.

I'm happy for men to post, why shouldn't they? The idea of a public forum is to get a range of opinions. MN is also not a particularly supportive space at times, some of the (female) posters are brutal.

ilovesooty · 02/06/2024 08:48

Newbutoldfather · 02/06/2024 08:45

It isn’t a women’s site, it is a parents’ site-their strap line is ‘by parents for parents’. I have been on here about 14 years, since I had a child. I have learned a lot and hopefully contributed usefully to others.

It is incredibly entitled to think that you can repurpose a site, especially if you are childless. I.E not an intended user (clearly different if you are trying to conceive or otherwise in some kind of parental role).

How are childfree posters intending to "repurpose the site" simply by posting?

Snoopingaroundhere · 02/06/2024 08:47

MrsDTucker · 02/06/2024 08:42

So I don't understand why you commented on my post.

So because I joined a few months ago I can't comment on your post 😂

InWithPeaceOutWithStress · 02/06/2024 08:47

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Newbutoldfather · 02/06/2024 08:45

It isn’t a women’s site, it is a parents’ site-their strap line is ‘by parents for parents’. I have been on here about 14 years, since I had a child. I have learned a lot and hopefully contributed usefully to others.

It is incredibly entitled to think that you can repurpose a site, especially if you are childless. I.E not an intended user (clearly different if you are trying to conceive or otherwise in some kind of parental role).

camelofdestiny · 02/06/2024 08:44

Dont mind men posting at all. What I do mind is when women are expressing a uniquely female experience (eg feeling unsafe in certain situations etc) and a man comes on to tell us we are wrong and shouldn't feel a certain way. I think that is absolutely vile, dangerously insidious and shows a complete lack of empathy or emotional intelligence.

ByPeachSeal · 02/06/2024 08:44

Firecarrier · 02/06/2024 08:41

One of the few things I absolutely detest about this place is that there are so many man haters, I know lots of fabulous dads/husbands - they do exist, hard as it is for some of you to believe.

So no, I don't hate men posting but I do hate posts like yours, they sound really spiteful and childish.

I also appreciate when people specify relevant points about themselves in their opening post (including the fact they're a man) it can be helpful on an anonymous forum, ask yourself why your knee-jerk reaction is to be irritated by someone simply letting you know that they're a man, it really doesn't have to be because they're about to mansplain.

I have seen posts over the years from males asking for help and opinions and they get jumped on, isn't it better that say a young single dad could come and get advice like a young single mum can?

Agreed.

DH quite often posts on here but has since stopped having any reference to the fact he may be a man precisely because that mention will entirely derail the thread.

MrsDTucker · 02/06/2024 08:42

So I don't understand why you commented on my post.

Snoopingaroundhere · 02/06/2024 08:41

MrsDTucker · 02/06/2024 08:39

@Snoopingaroundhere

Maybe so but not 15 years ago when I signed up.

Edited

Yeah it's different now,I only joined few months ago.

BlueJamSandwich · 02/06/2024 08:41

Perhaps Mumsnet could add a feature that prevents men posting on threads where they're not welcome? Or even from viewing threads that the OP has started where they don't want men anywhere near it.

I don't know how you'd get posters to verify their sex though, beyond declaring it when they register.

Longma · 02/06/2024 08:41

And they don't use the dadsnet and gransnet sites so much as there are far fewer posters in them, so posts get less responses and traction.
Mumsnet is the bigger of the sites with more posters so people,come here to get a wider spread of responses to their queries/posts.

Firecarrier · 02/06/2024 08:41

One of the few things I absolutely detest about this place is that there are so many man haters, I know lots of fabulous dads/husbands - they do exist, hard as it is for some of you to believe.

So no, I don't hate men posting but I do hate posts like yours, they sound really spiteful and childish.

I also appreciate when people specify relevant points about themselves in their opening post (including the fact they're a man) it can be helpful on an anonymous forum, ask yourself why your knee-jerk reaction is to be irritated by someone simply letting you know that they're a man, it really doesn't have to be because they're about to mansplain.

I have seen posts over the years from males asking for help and opinions and they get jumped on, isn't it better that say a young single dad could come and get advice like a young single mum can?

Longma · 02/06/2024 08:39

Mumsnet. By mums for mums.

But that isn't their tagline. Afaik it has never been.
Their official tagline is that it's for parents.

We have all manner of people posting on Mumsnet - women, men, parents, child free by choice, child free not by choice, grandparents, etc.

MrsDTucker · 02/06/2024 08:39

@Snoopingaroundhere

Maybe so but not 15 years ago when I signed up.

Original poster
N225NNW · 02/06/2024 08:38

BitOutOfPractice · 02/06/2024 08:26

I generally find men’s posts irritating too OP. But then I generally find a lot of men IRL to be irritating too.

😂🤷‍♀️

Lots of lovely men too. But such a lot of dross.

OP posts:
Chanelbasketballandchain · 02/06/2024 08:38

You are not unreasonable to have an opinion

I completely disagree. I don't even understand why the presence of men is such a bother. SOME people are trolls, bitter, nasty. It makes no difference whatsoever if they are male or female. On an anonymous forum, anyone could be anything in real life anyway. OP, you could be a man yourself for all we know.

It seems that sadly, for SOME posters, anyone reasonable and/ or helpful must be female, anyone unpleasant must be male. Looking at people in real life, it couldn't be further from the truth. Why does it matter if the person writing is male or female?

ByPeachSeal · 02/06/2024 08:37

saraclara · 02/06/2024 08:34

despite expecting men to be equal fathers you don’t want to allow them to share a parenting space to seek help.

Exactly.

The more fathers that seek advice, or simply learn from reading women's experiences and perspectives on motherhood, the better.

Yep, this is exactly how we get men in society as a whole to be equal parents.

We need them in these spaces, we should expect them here, because they also don’t automatically know how to care for a child.

Portfun24 · 02/06/2024 08:37

Ridiculous of you.

Snoopingaroundhere · 02/06/2024 08:36

saraclara · 02/06/2024 08:34

despite expecting men to be equal fathers you don’t want to allow them to share a parenting space to seek help.

Exactly.

The more fathers that seek advice, or simply learn from reading women's experiences and perspectives on motherhood, the better.

I agree with you 💯

saraclara · 02/06/2024 08:36

Hotnamehere · 02/06/2024 08:33

I don't like the men who only post on the sex board. I think they make that board unusable for the majority of women on MN.

I don't visit that board, but I think that's the only reason to resent (those particular) men posting.

Original poster
N225NNW · 02/06/2024 08:35

FixTheBone · 02/06/2024 08:24

Yeah.....

The last post on their forum was 5 months ago....

Show quote history

Says it all.

OP posts:
StarlightLady · 02/06/2024 08:35

I have no probs with men posting if their reasoning is to learn from women. I think many men would benefit from that.

But not if they mansplain or apply misogynist attitudes, which, to be fair, most make posters don’t.

Original poster
N225NNW · 02/06/2024 08:34

DickJagger · 02/06/2024 08:23

I totally agree with you OP.

There's an awful lot of dick pandering goes on when men post.

😂😂 yes. See it irl too 🤢

OP posts: