Instrumental teacher refusing to teach my child

It's hardly outing. This type of parent are legion and they walk amongst us.

She'll have it taken down for "privacy reasons". 2.

I vote for No 1

tho I will be waiting with bated breath until Tuesday evening in the sad hope of an update.

OP will come back gloating that music teacher apologised to her for all of the misunderstandings and has agreed to teach her son for free from now on.

Or some other similar “gotcha” that seems utterly inexplicable but is mysteriously trotted out when a thread appears to be going badly for an OP.

Oooh . . . I would love no. 5 best of all your options but would feel safer placer my money on options 1 - 4. Probably no. 1 is the safest bet . . . .

Place your bets -

1. Op never comes back.
2. Thread is taken down after op complains and asks for it to be removed and she deregisters.
3. Op returns and gives a stupid excuse as to why she is so rude - foreign/autistic/had a bad childhood etc.
4. Op sticks to her guns and is even more arrogant and rude.
5. The music teacher appears and is lovely and we all applaud her!

Do people like you really exist? I feel so sorry for the music teacher, and lets face it going by your awful attitude on here, all your DSs teachers, who have to put up with you!

You should, but wont, reflect this is a situation entirely of your own making..

You should have paid for the next half term minus the overpaid lesson. That payment was due at the start of the half term, not one week in. So if you intended to pay one week in you're the one who is wrong.

You rather cooked your own goose there, didn't you? It's a shame for your son. She might choose to relent, if you are very, very lucky. I can see why she might decide you're not worth the bother though.

I'm self employed
I'm a tutor
No way would i accept being spoken to like that. In almost 15 years I have dropped maybe 3 students but you would have been dropped like a hot potato.
You pointed out the over payment and it should have ended there.

I am really sorry but I think you are in the wrong here. The teacher apologised for her error and then you messaged again and told her she was rude. I am not surprised about her decision; whilst she is teaching your son, the financial part of the relationship lies with you. Have you tried messaging and apologising? I would give that a go, personally. Also, if she does not accept the apology then I would not send your son in and expect him to go and take the lesson. I believe she is likely to send him away and tell him he is no longer having lessons and then he is going to be upset, which would be awful. I also do not think the head will force her to change her mind; it is her prerogative as a freelancer who she does, and does not, teach. As you say your child likes her and enjoys the lessons it’s an unfortunate bridge to have burned. Perhaps, as the lessons are something your child values, next time, reflect a little more on the messages send surrounding extra-curricular activities. Sounds like an unfortunate outcome for your son but there is still a chance, with an apology, she may change her mind. I really hope that this is the case for your child.

She will finish this term I guess but you will not be accepted September 2024.

She is not obliged to teach your son next term

You better send a really good grovelling apology, and never assume.

OP seems to have gone quiet. Licking her wounds perhaps?

OP be aware that the world of freelance music teachers and similar is often close knit. Several years ago when I dumped a young client as they had "That Parent" I emailed my peers in the area to warn them. No freelancer worth their salt needs to inconvenience themself with a difficult client. Dump and move on to the next on the waiting list.

Oh you’d already jumped the shark, but with that you’ve circled back and taken another run at it 🤣

So if this wasn’t all made up, you’d be saying that the reason the teacher missed the additional payment was because it was entirely unsolicited. So you were expecting her to note a random payment that she didn’t ask for or want, and then have the extra work of adjusting your invoice for the half term ahead but not anyone else’s. And then you were rude to her when she didn’t do this. Twice.

I said at the start - no way were you going to have the balls to show us the rude email you wrote. Surprise surprise, you still haven’t 😆

You sound really entitled and rude! You totally disregard her as a person. Why would she put herself through that behaviour, she knows better and she can go without. Learn your lesson and think Before you speak/ type.

So... This is also patronising...

You didn't ask /advise her of this payment... Just expecting her to notice and guess what this was for!!!

She'll be having many pupils and money transfers from different parents /schools... How the eff is she supposed to work this out and adjust bills...??

But if course you're so entitled... You didn't consider this... 😂😂😂

What do you mean by this bit in your post?

I wrote another message saying that in fact I always pay on time and didn’t appreciate getting messages saying I hadn’t paid when I had.

There’s nothing in your post that says that the teacher messaged you to say you hadn’t paid. I’m not sure why you sent her this message to say you always pay on time etc.

Also, I don’t think the headteacher can do anything to resolve this, as the music teacher is freelance, so presumably is not directly employed by the school. It would basically be a waste of the headteacher’s time to get involved.

Is this a parody? You know you’re getting an amazing deal but you think it’s fine to be rude to her and she should carry on helping you out? 🤯

It's her business. She can do as she likes. She didn't like how you reacted therefore she doesn't have to put up with your attitude. You can't demand she teaches your child. That's ridiculous.

Whatever you EXPECT is pretty irrelevant as there is a person too on the other side... ... Clearly, the teacher EXPECTED parents to be civil to her... You weren't!! So she has withdrawn from any contract you had!

How unfortunate for you to be so ignorant.
Trying to take a kind view of your behaviour-I wonder if you are a 'no-body' in life (no shame-many of us are) and that no-one takes a blind bit of notice of you unless they have to- only if, for example, you are a customer.

I ask because I have noticed that this is they type of person who tends to throw their weight around when they think someone who they are paying has to take notice of them. They tend to get over excited and think -for a fleeting moment that hey are important.

They are often to be found also chucking their weight around in their child's school, the doctor's surgery and places like these.

I am sure you are now as puffed up as a turkey, humping and gumping to yourself, convinced that you have your foot on her neck and that she will be worried about it.

Take a step back, ask yourself why you want to be that woman who looks as if she is devoid of any charm and grace.

You might not have intended to be rude but believe me, every message you have written in this thread comes across as rude, arrogant and self entitled which is no doubt why the music teacher does not want to have to deal with you again.

Acknowledging how rude you come across is a starting point but you're going to have to do some serious grovelling when you see her.

OP, you have rightly bitten your own arse.🤣
You have completely over estimated your value to a good violin teacher that your child likes.
Your child is in a small group setting, directly after school, in the school, both suiting you time/money wise.

You have succeeded in completely unnecessarily marked yourself out as a THAT parent.
In demand music teachers dump parents like you with alarcity.
In short, you have REALLY fxcked up.
Go cap in hand and apologise profusely and hope to God she gives you the benefit of the doubt.
If she does, back slowly from the room, bowing as you do.😁
The alternative will be ten times more painful for you and your son, than humble pie.

Wow I can hardly believe this is real.

Your son has music lessons.
The agreement is for you to pay in advance at the start of each term.
You decided to include additional payment for one lesson at the start of this term in last terms payment.
You do not mention informing the music teacher you were doing this but even if you did why do you expect her to remember? She has a system, you messed around with it.
She expected payment for the correct number of lessons in this term and emailed you to say that.
You belatedly informed her of your decision to include fees for one lesson this term in last terms payment.
She found the payment and apologised.

YOU CREATED THE CONFUSION AND SHE APOLOGISED BUT YOU COULDN'T LEAVE IT THERE, YOU DECIDED TO BE RUDE TO HER.

You can complain to the head all you like, the music teacher is freelance, she doesn't have to teach your son. You have ruined this for your son. She is not cancelling the lessons because she does not want to teach your son, she's doing it because she does not want to deal with you.

Your only hope of rescuing the situation is to offer a groveling apology for creating confusion with payments and being rude to her. Although reading your comments here I hope she will have the sense to stick to her guns. You still owe her an apology.