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AIBU?

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To think it was obvious they were for the kids??

711 replies

Birump · 01/06/2024 09:13

DS is having a little play date today, low key birthday “party” but DS doesn’t really do parties so it’s more of a gloried play date.
Yesterday I did some baking … 8 sausage rolls, 8 scotch eggs, 8 jam slags and 8 chocolate brownies.

Came down this morning and most of it is gone, I text DH asking if he’d touched the baking and he said yes, he’d taken it for work.

im fuming, isn’t it fucking obvious that they were for the kids for today?? He’s insisting that it was not obvious. This is not the first time he’s done something like this.

OP posts:
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Nazzywish · 01/06/2024 11:24

I'm usually the one saying food should be shared etc etc but this completely wrong. It's clearly for the kids and I'm assuming because you've done exactly 8nof everything you wouldn't normally cook over like this and have things like this baked. He definitely been too selfish here. How could he not see they were for the kids ?!

MinnieMountain · 01/06/2024 11:24

I doubt anyone is seriously suggesting ringing his boss but it must be extremely tempting.

BettyBardMacDonald · 01/06/2024 11:23

TheGirlWithTheMousyHair · 01/06/2024 11:17

So, OP, your own husband doesn’t care about:

your time
your effort
embarrassing you in front of other people
ruining his child’s birthday party

How does he show you he does care? Or are you just his support human, there to enable his life, and there to be disregarded and belittled like this at his whim? Honestly, if my DH pulled this sort of shit, he wouldn’t be coming home. Especially as you seem to know well enough that he did this on purpose, so it can’t be the first time. What do you get out of this relationship?

Well said. I'm wondering the same.

This is not about sausage rolls; it's about his fundamental character.

AGodawfulsmallaffair · 01/06/2024 11:22

Jam slags is now my new password.

LostTheMarble · 01/06/2024 11:22

StormingNorman · 01/06/2024 11:16

Men are dense about things that don’t directly affect them. I tell DH to help yourself or don’t touch every single time I bake 🤣

Men are dense about things that don’t directly affect them.

No they’re not. You’ve just been brainwashed into believing that so it seems cute and puts you in a position of carer for said men. What’s actually happening is that they’re absolving themselves of all responsibility because they’ve convinced women like you to go ‘durr men eh? What silly Billy’s, just give them constant instructions and it’s all fine!’.

Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g · 01/06/2024 11:22

Crunchymum · 01/06/2024 11:20

He shouldn't have taken them, but if you were going to the trouble of making all these lovely things why didn't you make a fee extra for the family? Odd to bake an amount specific to just the party and no extras.

Family would get what's left. OP had probably factored that in.

Crunchymum · 01/06/2024 11:20

He shouldn't have taken them, but if you were going to the trouble of making all these lovely things why didn't you make a fee extra for the family? Odd to bake an amount specific to just the party and no extras.

TheGirlWithTheMousyHair · 01/06/2024 11:18

StormingNorman · 01/06/2024 11:16

Men are dense about things that don’t directly affect them. I tell DH to help yourself or don’t touch every single time I bake 🤣

Is he unwell? Does he need help with communication and cognition? Is he unable to speak, to ask you questions? I cannot believe what some of the women on these boards put up with in a so-called partner.

TheGirlWithTheMousyHair · 01/06/2024 11:17

So, OP, your own husband doesn’t care about:

your time
your effort
embarrassing you in front of other people
ruining his child’s birthday party

How does he show you he does care? Or are you just his support human, there to enable his life, and there to be disregarded and belittled like this at his whim? Honestly, if my DH pulled this sort of shit, he wouldn’t be coming home. Especially as you seem to know well enough that he did this on purpose, so it can’t be the first time. What do you get out of this relationship?

StormingNorman · 01/06/2024 11:16

Men are dense about things that don’t directly affect them. I tell DH to help yourself or don’t touch every single time I bake 🤣

HoldingTheDoor · 01/06/2024 11:16

I can’t believe that people are advocating humiliating themselves by saying that they’d phone his boss. Seriously? He’s an adult at work not a child in school and WTAF has it got to do with his boss? He’s rightly not going to give a flying fuck. What planet do you people live on?

StormingNorman · 01/06/2024 11:13

Birump · 01/06/2024 09:31

I do sometimes do a batch of baking but whenever I do I always say “there are some sausage rolls in the kitchen if you want to take some to work” … I don’t make jam slags etc though, imo they’re obviously for kids.

plus I was speaking to him last night and he asked if I was buying party snacks for today and I said “no, I’m baking for it instead” so it was obvious!!

(jam slags - like jam tarts but bigger with jam balls on top, my mum used to make them bless her)

I need a picture of a jam slag. I can’t get my head around the ball of jam on top 🤣

Sue152 · 01/06/2024 11:13

Call him and tell him he's a greedy little jam slag. Of course they were for the kids.

CurlewKate · 01/06/2024 11:11

@LostTheMarble "Why would she need to tell him that? How uninvolved is he in family life that he doesn’t know his son is having a party or that a large bake isn’t necessarily for him?"

I read "uninvolved" as "unevolved" and was nodding along in agreement!

redfacebigdisgrace · 01/06/2024 11:11

This makes me rage on your behalf. It’s the love and thought that’s gone into baking these little treats for your son. What a selfish horrible man.

2catsandhappy · 01/06/2024 11:07

100% sabotage. A deliberate spiteful act.

Is he bitter that he is working on a Saturday or missing a small celebration?
Now you have had time to think, has he intentionaly tried to spoil other people's fun before @Birump ?
We can all see through his faux 'oh I didn't know' act. I hope he chokes on his son's stolen pastries.

Noshowlomo · 01/06/2024 11:06

That would be the last jam slag he’d ever have from me.
Tell him he’s a single slag now!

Tunefultwix · 01/06/2024 11:06

Wheredidileavemycarkeys · 01/06/2024 10:55

I don’t suppose there’s any chance you could phone up his boss and explain he’s taken all the food for his kids party and he needs to bring it back? 🤔

I would definitely do this, because I wouldn't stand for such behaviour.

Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g · 01/06/2024 11:05

LonelyBones · 01/06/2024 09:48

Im going against the grain here and going to say that, you should have made more or enough for your DH if you knew that he enjoys your baking. A little thoughtfulness goes a long way and now you're angsting over the baking for the party. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Ludicrous post. You seem to be implying that OP is at fault for putting her son first on his birthday and not anticipating that his utterly selfish father would want some home baking as well. Get a grip. The little boy comes first today, not the overgrown toddler.

Tunefultwix · 01/06/2024 11:05

Is his work close enough for you to go and get them? You definitely shouldn't have to, but at least it would show him he can't behave like this.

Whatwaswrongwiththatusername · 01/06/2024 11:04

ExtraOnions · 01/06/2024 10:33

I’ll do anything for a pot of Bonne Maman Strawberry Preserve

I am the Jam Slag …

Oh I had to throw away an almost full pot of the wild strawberry Bonne Maman conserve a couple of days ago. It had somehow been forgotten about at the back of the fridge and actually had mould growing in it! 🤢 In my defence, of being a jammy slag, I can say this would never happen to a jar of the black cherry 🐷🐷

Itiswhysofew · 01/06/2024 11:03

He’s 100% done it on purpose. Wow! Truly unbelievable behaviour towards you and the birthday boy.

Peaceandquietandacuppa · 01/06/2024 10:57

Birump · 01/06/2024 09:13

DS is having a little play date today, low key birthday “party” but DS doesn’t really do parties so it’s more of a gloried play date.
Yesterday I did some baking … 8 sausage rolls, 8 scotch eggs, 8 jam slags and 8 chocolate brownies.

Came down this morning and most of it is gone, I text DH asking if he’d touched the baking and he said yes, he’d taken it for work.

im fuming, isn’t it fucking obvious that they were for the kids for today?? He’s insisting that it was not obvious. This is not the first time he’s done something like this.

Why didn’t he ask you first? I’d be fuming and quite frankly it’s a LTB if this is a regular occurrence (him being a selfish twat)

Myblindsaredown · 01/06/2024 10:57

Wheredidileavemycarkeys · 01/06/2024 10:55

I don’t suppose there’s any chance you could phone up his boss and explain he’s taken all the food for his kids party and he needs to bring it back? 🤔

Good grief, who in their right mind would do this.

Wheredidileavemycarkeys · 01/06/2024 10:55

I don’t suppose there’s any chance you could phone up his boss and explain he’s taken all the food for his kids party and he needs to bring it back? 🤔

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