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AIBU?

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To think it was obvious they were for the kids??

711 replies

Birump · 01/06/2024 09:13

DS is having a little play date today, low key birthday “party” but DS doesn’t really do parties so it’s more of a gloried play date.
Yesterday I did some baking … 8 sausage rolls, 8 scotch eggs, 8 jam slags and 8 chocolate brownies.

Came down this morning and most of it is gone, I text DH asking if he’d touched the baking and he said yes, he’d taken it for work.

im fuming, isn’t it fucking obvious that they were for the kids for today?? He’s insisting that it was not obvious. This is not the first time he’s done something like this.

OP posts:
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13
GingerPirate · 01/06/2024 12:18

It sounds very nice, although Idk what a jam slag is.
Your husband couldn't resist and took the stuff.
I understand you are fuming, however,
I understand your husband also. Mine would be very unhappy to just look at food I prepared.
Yes, he's significantly older and we are child free.
I'd be happy if I could come up with stuff like this and he'd enjoyed it.
I understand that's not the point.
Possibly getting him involved in the preparation and making enough stuff for adults also
could be a solution.

Change2banon · 01/06/2024 12:18

ShoveItUpYourArseMargaret · 01/06/2024 12:13

Firstly, it’s odd that your DS is celebrating his birthday and your DH won’t be there - he doesn’t sound like a very involved dad tbh (and I say this as a solo parent with no dad around).

Secondly, he needs to bring the food back asap - end of. This is non-negotiable.

Is there a massive back story OP? Posts like this makes me glad I’m done with that sh*%.

As much as what the dad did was wrong … your assumption statement is harsh - it’s not odd that the child is celebrating without dad, not all jobs are mon to fri 9-5, there may be no way to have a party where everyone can be there. Also Secondly, he needs to bring the food back asap - end of. This is non-negotiable., great in theory, but not many can just walk out of their job to run back home! Clearly dad was a complete dick, but your response is just daft.

allthemiddlechildrenoftheworld · 01/06/2024 12:18

@Birump what was his excuse for taking the food? how much did he take? he is a horrible dad to do that to his childs party food when he knew perfectly well why it was there!!

Roundroundthegarden · 01/06/2024 12:16

How selfish of him!
Yanbu.

TemuSpecialBuy · 01/06/2024 12:15

I dont care how inconvenient it was i would go and get them from his work.

What an arsehole.

Maray1967 · 01/06/2024 12:15

Whatineed · 01/06/2024 12:08

Sorry OP.

I have a 19 yo DS who can be very self absorbed at times. If I do a big bake, he will always ask if he can have one and not just help himself, as they may be for visitors or a work birthday or something.

I assume your DH also knew that a member of his own family was having a birthday party?

I'd tell him to bring them back, or get himself to the shop for replacements.

Yes, exactly -I’ve got a DS24 - he always asks what he can have/take when I’ve baked.

Maray1967 · 01/06/2024 12:14

OP, he sounds like a man who needs to be ‘incentivised’ to do the right thing - I.e. threatened. He brings it back - or he will seriously regret it.

I’d photo myself pouring his best alcohol for the sink and tell him he knows what to do to prevent the rest of it going the same way.

ShoveItUpYourArseMargaret · 01/06/2024 12:13

Firstly, it’s odd that your DS is celebrating his birthday and your DH won’t be there - he doesn’t sound like a very involved dad tbh (and I say this as a solo parent with no dad around).

Secondly, he needs to bring the food back asap - end of. This is non-negotiable.

Is there a massive back story OP? Posts like this makes me glad I’m done with that sh*%.

Whatineed · 01/06/2024 12:08

Sorry OP.

I have a 19 yo DS who can be very self absorbed at times. If I do a big bake, he will always ask if he can have one and not just help himself, as they may be for visitors or a work birthday or something.

I assume your DH also knew that a member of his own family was having a birthday party?

I'd tell him to bring them back, or get himself to the shop for replacements.

LadyHavelockVetinari · 01/06/2024 12:07

CoralReader · 01/06/2024 11:59

He’s working, that’s probably helping to fund the party…

still a dick move though

Edited

Really? In my experience men who literally steal candy from little children don't pay for parties. It's the women who put away their extra income to buy "bits for the kids" while their husbands fund their own hobbies.

Alalalalalongalalalalalonglonglilong · 01/06/2024 12:05

I'd really appreciate a jam slag photo

LadyHavelockVetinari · 01/06/2024 12:04

Absolutely love the term jam slags haha!

In seriousness though he has done it deliberately because he can't stand you paying attention to someone else. Either he brings then back or you divorce.

Alalalalalongalalalalalonglonglilong · 01/06/2024 12:03

@CrispieCake I like your idea!

JamSlag · 01/06/2024 12:03

PonyPatter44 · 01/06/2024 11:56

Does he have learning difficulties or something? Or is he just a nasty mean-spirited little arsehole?

Hope your DS has a lovely party regardless of his dad's behaviour. Jam slags is bloody brilliant. I might make it my new user name.

Sorry, you're about 2 hrs too late. 😁 You could be JamSlagSlag (a slag for jam slags)?

CoralReader · 01/06/2024 12:02

Did he take them all…
that is annoying

pinkyredrose · 01/06/2024 12:00

Greediness is such an unattractive trait. Is he overweight?

IAlwaysTellTheTruthEvenWhenILie · 01/06/2024 12:00

Awful. Regardless of a party or not, DH would always check with me if I had plans for the baking / leftovers in the fridge before taking any.

CoralReader · 01/06/2024 11:59

mathsAIoptions · 01/06/2024 09:18

Fucking men. I bet he did fuck all for the party too.

He’s working, that’s probably helping to fund the party…

still a dick move though

Cherrysoup · 01/06/2024 11:58

Why has he done it deliberately, @Birump ? To piss you off? As a control thing? I think he’d never have anything cooked by me again, no dinner, he can fuck right off, he’s unbelievably selfish and disrespectful.

PonyPatter44 · 01/06/2024 11:56

Does he have learning difficulties or something? Or is he just a nasty mean-spirited little arsehole?

Hope your DS has a lovely party regardless of his dad's behaviour. Jam slags is bloody brilliant. I might make it my new user name.

Howbizarre22 · 01/06/2024 11:56

Ugh. Tell him he’s a jam slag!! Seriously what an arse hole!

Maray1967 · 01/06/2024 11:54

Yes, OP, I’d give the large jam tarts a new name … but seriously, if you are sure he has done this deliberately, then it would be war, as far as I’m concerned. Remind him that you’re in the house - with all his stuff.

RunAwayTurnAwayRunAwayTurnAway · 01/06/2024 11:52

Jam slags.

Thriving30 · 01/06/2024 11:51

Also I don't think jam slags are a thing - which is hilarious! Do you mean the jam thumbprint cookies?

Thriving30 · 01/06/2024 11:50

I'd be fuming, especially as you said most of it had been taken, it's not like he'd taken just one or two items.