To tell colleague people are chatting behind her back

I wouldn't say anything. It's just going to upset her. Stay out of it. It's just causing trouble

Sadly I have previously been the target of work colleagues like this. The comedian Chris Rock once said, “if women ruled the world there’d just be a whole bunch of countries not talking to each other”. Until women start genuinely supporting each other nothing will change.

OP your colleagues sound bitter and spiteful. I would distance myself from them in social situations.

I wouldn't tell her, but would call them.out.

NO don't tell her! You will just hurt her and damage her relationships at work.
Just stand up for her, call them out and try to close the conversation down if there is a next time.

How lucky for this young woman that she at least has all the lovely chivalrous men around her to protect her from the vicious jealous old women. They run the world you know, ugly old women. They call all the shots. If it weren't for calm virtuous men everything would descend into anarchic fighting.

My point is, make it clear you're not ok with that. Don't sit and listen. Either leave or pull them up on it.

When my daughters friend told her another girl had bad mouthed her it just made her really sad and I was annoyed this friend found it necessary to tell her

I agree with previous posters not to tell her or even get involved.

When someone bitches about another, the only person you truly learn something about is the bitcher. They're showing themselves up.

As long as it remains as insecure, pathetic women bitching about someone else and doesn't affect her directly, i don't see that there is much to be done.

As a previous poster said, bitches gonna bitch,sadly.

YABU - do NOT tell her that the other women are bitching about her and therefore she should move jobs! WTF.

Tell the other women that they are so jealous they are fluorescent green. Tell them their bitching doesn’t make them come across well and all the men who were being kind will see them as such.

Tell them that this smart, lovely, beautiful young lady is going far in life, and it won’t be long before they are all lining up to kiss her arse.

My concern would be that there were members of the HR team and a senior manager present that did not shut down this kind of conversation. They should be ashamed to be part of this at this level it is very unprofessional. At the very least they should be checking in on this young woman regarding the claims she is being sexually harassed by clients.

Women can be nasty, bitter, jealous bitches.
That pretty much sums up what is going on here imo.

They feel utterly threatened by your colleague and it taps into all of their own insecurities and failings.

Men don't project in the same way!

I know, is this the 80s/90s!?

So so gross that someone so young get so much unwanted sexual attention and harrassment, men are so gross. It's their behaviour setting the competitive, jealous streak off in the women. Those men would make me sick
BUT the women should be more grown up and not blame the 23 yr old for it. Support women and speak out against the men who are being slimy.

Your company sounds godawful. Not just the unpleasant talk about a member of the team who appears to be pulling her weight professionally, but the fact that you appear to think it's normal that she experiences sexual harassment from senior male clients, and that this is generally known about and no one acts to protect her because said clients bring in a lot of money? Dealing unsupported in her early 20s with regular sexual harassment in the workplace is far worse than the bitchy comments of colleagues. In your shoes, I'd talk to her about that, and suggest options to explore, and that it's not normal or necessary.

I don't throw around the word 'toxic' a lot, but this does sound like a thoroughly toxic workplace.

This is part of the reason I don't want to hang out with work colleagues unless I have to. I would rather be seen as boring than getting involved in this kind of thing. I admit I do feel uncomfortable/insecure when I am with someone superior than me, especially in terms of appearance. However, that doesn't mean I can/will gossip or talk behind their back. It is just morally wrong.

I have learned to hold a lot of my personal thoughts in my head and keep work conversation as "professional". If someone starts to gossip, I just smile and not enquire further, change the conversation or excuse my self.

And no, don't tell your colleague. She doesnt need to know. You could show support by being friendly with her and avoid getting involved in a conversation like this. Sometimes, you can convey your standpoint/principles without words.

You just sat there and did nothing. Actually, you validated their feelings. Wow.

Be careful how you proceed - this could backfire on you. If people feel happy saying this kind of stuff in front of the HR people, this really speaks to the culture of the organisation.

Now that you know the kind of people you work with, install a voice recording app on your phone. Start it up discretely next time you go to the pub - if the bullying happens again, you will have evidence and can proceed from there - choose to do something with it or just keep it in case you need evidence of the toxic workplace culture in future.

This way, you won't feel like you are doing nothing, but you aren't risking your own position. You say you are socially anxious - that doesn't put you in a good position if the toxic colleagues set their sites on you...

And people thought the Jeremy Kyle show had to actually coach its hapless lowlifes to behave as they did on screen...

If you tell her, you're being equally bitchy with some spite added. Say nothing.

Christ, the sisterhood is alive and well, isn’t it? How much more of this ageist shite will we have to put up with here?

Newsflash: it’s those same menopausal women who fought for you to have enhanced maternity pay, not get sacked for being pregnant, and to receive the same wage as the men in your company, doofus.

It would do more harm than good. Imagine how shit she will feel. She is currently blissfully unaware.

Bloody hell. You really do get the misogynistic shite all your life don’t you? How do you suggest we harridans support ourselves, or should we just off ourselves the moment we’re not reproductively useful?

No reason to tell her. But I would have told the bitchy women what I thought and if that meant I'm their next target well so be it.

I'm glad the men were standing up for her but the women who were there ahd didn't like it should stand up for her too.

We like to pretend that girl power exists and that women have got your back but in my experience this isn't true. Unless they are true friends other women will bitch about women given the chance and the forum.

Your colleagues sound unbelievably pathetic. This girl ‘deserves’ sexual harassment. That’s a disgusting comment. Where do work because it sounds like a backwater. No don’t tell her, as another poster said, advocate for her and call them out, the miserable bitches need knocking down a peg. I’ve been through a similar thing at work and it’s horrible. I’ve had the social pariah treatment because some male coworkers flirted with me, it’s so horrible.