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Can't visit friend as her dog is racist

483 replies

CaliforniaCookie · 31/05/2024 19:15

I was making plans to visit one of my best friends.
She is white and I'm mixed race.

She told me she was concerned as her new dog who i haven't met, is racist.

Anytime he sees a person who is not white he goes mental.

This is honestly not a fake post.

Not sure how to respond. Advice welcome.

OP posts:
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6
HappiestSleeping · 31/05/2024 21:03

abracadabra1980 · 31/05/2024 20:06

Sorry I have to disagree. I live in the north east and I have had two dogs who reacted to black people - mainly on the TV. Of course it's not racist it's simply an animal who is unfamiliar with a different looking human being to what they have always known. The same as they'd possibly react to someone in fancy dress.

So you do agree then? It is just reacting to something that it either doesn't understand or has had a bad experience with before.

It isn't doing it because it is racist. Could just as easily be someone with polkadot skin.

And of course, that doesn't change the fact that the dog's behaviour can be adjusted.

YoureALizardHarry11 · 31/05/2024 21:03

I think the lightheartedness of this thread is lost on some and they’re taking it a bit too literally. Of course a dog can’t be ‘’racist’’, we know that! What OP means is the dog is scared of people with dark skin, which can happen if the dog isn’t used to it 🤣 I would have thought it didn’t need clarifying.

ChardonnaysBeastlyCat · 31/05/2024 21:03

fieldsofbutterflies · 31/05/2024 21:02

I never said dogs were racist - at least, not in the human sense.

But it's very normal for dogs to be scared by things that are unfamiliar to them, and not always as easy as "training them better".

What other sense is there?

fieldsofbutterflies · 31/05/2024 21:02

Spudthespanner · 31/05/2024 21:00

@fieldsofbutterflies

Tell me you know nothing about dogs...

How the fuck is a dog racist?

My old dog used to bark at the Brookside theme tune. Must hate scousers...

I never said dogs were racist - at least, not in the human sense.

But it's very normal for dogs to be scared by things that are unfamiliar to them, and not always as easy as "training them better".

Spudthespanner · 31/05/2024 21:00

@fieldsofbutterflies

Tell me you know nothing about dogs...

How the fuck is a dog racist?

My old dog used to bark at the Brookside theme tune. Must hate scousers...

fieldsofbutterflies · 31/05/2024 20:58

Spudthespanner · 31/05/2024 20:42

@CaptainMyCaptain

What on earth are you talking about? It's embarrassing if a dog reacts badly to anyone

Posters are saying they are mortified because their racist dogs are barking at black people. That's ridiculous. Train your dog better and stop calling it racist.

Tell me you know nothing about dogs...

Spudthespanner · 31/05/2024 20:58

@BewaretheIckabog

Yep because no rescue dog was ever spooked by something unfamiliar.

Jesus Christ. Yes, that's not my point. My point is

A) the dog isn't racist ffs
B) if a dog barks at someone, the person isn't thinking "oh it's barking at me because I'm black/white/Asian/have a stupid haircut." They're just thinking "ugh. Horrid barking dog, keep it away from me."

Flopsythebunny · 31/05/2024 20:57

CowboyJoanna · 31/05/2024 19:21

Obvious wind up

I don't think it is. I had a rescue GSD. I got him when he was around 6 months old. he was just the same.
With the help of the lovely Indian woman who lived next door we trained it out of him. it took about a year though

TheGhostILoveTheMost · 31/05/2024 20:54

Definitely a 'thing' my dad lives in a multicultural area, has a multicultural family and friends. Dog see's P.O.C. all the time. My s.i.l. is black, nephews mixed race, many of my dad's friends and neighbours are black.
It's not like he's never seen any other than white people. He still goes mad, barks, growls. No idea why. He's not like that with white people.
Dad's had him from a puppy. No bad experience.
Not a chihuahua.

OverfilledBookcase · 31/05/2024 20:51

Well OP you know the dog is not actually racist but as you said it’s a ‘new’ dog, does that mean it’s an adult dog that changed owners or a puppy? Does your friend know its history? It’s obviously had exposure to non whites if she’s said it’s goes nuts when it sees one so likelihood is it has a stress response for whatever reason.

Can she find a non white behaviour therapist?

Assume you’re staying overnight due to distance, she needs to ensure your safety by keeping the dog in an enclosed room, and on a lead when in the same room as you, with you periodically giving it treats and it seeing you putting its food out? Perhaps even you taking a small item of worn, unwashed clothing that can be put in its bed? An old top that you don’t mind getting rid of that you could wear while travelling. It’s not something that can be changed in one visit but that might help to calm it down if it’s used to your smell over the course of the first night.

As PP have said I’d think twice if it’s a big dog or a bully breed but your friend needs to sort it out anyway before it attacks someone.

BewaretheIckabog · 31/05/2024 20:51

Spudthespanner · 31/05/2024 20:42

@CaptainMyCaptain

What on earth are you talking about? It's embarrassing if a dog reacts badly to anyone

Posters are saying they are mortified because their racist dogs are barking at black people. That's ridiculous. Train your dog better and stop calling it racist.

Yep because no rescue dog was ever spooked by something unfamiliar.

Unfortunately if you live in certain parts of Wiltshire your dog may never have seen a black person.

If you live in the Manchester suburbs and walk in parks your dog may not have seen a horse or a cow.

Ask a behaviourist, a really well trained dog may react to something it has never encountered before.

peopleonthebusgoupanddown · 31/05/2024 20:49

My dog is also racist, and has a pop at anyone with a noticeable mental disability. It is incredibly embarrassing.

I'm not sure what advice to give really, other than see her without the dog.

If she's a particularly good friend and if you wanted to, you could help her get the dog used to the idea of non-white people by giving it lots of treats every time you see it. But that would be incredibly kind and selfless of you. I'm a dog lover, but wouldn't be interested in doing that for a friend.

Spudthespanner · 31/05/2024 20:42

@CaptainMyCaptain

What on earth are you talking about? It's embarrassing if a dog reacts badly to anyone

Posters are saying they are mortified because their racist dogs are barking at black people. That's ridiculous. Train your dog better and stop calling it racist.

Bunnyhair · 31/05/2024 20:42

My mother’s dog hates men, and anyone wearing a hat. Barks the place down.

stayathomer · 31/05/2024 20:40

ActualCannibalShiaLeBeouf
I actually read that dogs don't like other dogs who are black. Something to do with not being able to make out their facial features so can't tell if they're a threat or not. We have a mainly black dog and other dogs always have a go. Unfortunately she's a feisty little thing and gives as good as she gets
Ooh thanks for the reasoning, our dog gets a lot of hate from other dogs too (he’s a very content (on walks, crazy at home lol) cocker spaniel Who has dogs suddenly snarl when they see him, our neighbour’s dog included. EVERY person says ‘sorry, he/she just seems to hate/ be afraid of black dogs’. If our neighbour’s dog, who is lovely in every other way, had the chance he’d kill our dog so we not have had to fully close off part of the garden so they don’t see each other

BellaBobbins · 31/05/2024 20:36

Speaking of the dogs I know...

My dog goes bananas if he spots a GSD. He turns from a daft soppy creature into a barky beast. We rescued him so he's possibly had a run in with that type of breed, but even after lots of socialising with other dogs, he's not happy if he spots a GSD.

My friends dog doesn't like men, she's reluctantly made friends with her human dad and brothers, but much prefers female company.

Grossirsansplaisir · 31/05/2024 20:36

Yabu for using the word racist. It's a dog.

This is more common than you might think though, usually comes from not being socialised well enough as a puppy.

This is why my dog now barks at people in wheelchairs. It's not because he's ableist.

He also barks at men when it's dark. He's not a misandrist.

CaptainMyCaptain · 31/05/2024 20:32

Spudthespanner · 31/05/2024 20:24

For everyone saying they have or have known "racist" dogs, and say it's "mortifying" (sad face) ...

... what the fuck are you talking about?

If a dog barks at a black person do you really think the black person's first thought it "it's cos I is black, innit." Have you been barked at by a dog and thought "this dog hates whitey"? 🙄

The black person will just think "what a nasty, nippy little mutt" and carry on with their day. They don't have telepathic communication with the rest of the black population so the next black person will think the same thing and, again, move on with their day.

What on earth are you talking about? It's embarrassing if a dog reacts badly to anyone even if the person doesn't see it as racist, disablist or whatever. Nobody thinks the dog knows its being racist either, it's just an instinctive reaction to something it's unfamiliar with. There's an elderly man who 'jogs' along the canal path near me wearing normal clothes and my dog barks at him although she's fine with the usual runners in sportswear. There's no logic to it but dogs like everything to be familiar and predictable.

BewaretheIckabog · 31/05/2024 20:30

OP I don’t lock my difficult dog away when I have unknown people visit as I fear that will create more problems. I do keep him on a very short lead even in the house and to be fair he seems to settle after a while.

I do put him in another room whilst they are mooching around using the bathroom etc and it seems to be working.

What breed of dog are we talking about? I’d take my chances with a small breed who didn’t like me but not necessarily with a larger dog.

Meadowfinch · 31/05/2024 20:29

No, it isn't ridiculous. Our GSD was like that. He used to bark hysterically at dark skinned men.

In the end, we worked out that it wasn't skin colour that set him off, because he was fine with one visitor we had from the caribbean, but not a friend from Nigeria or any of our Asian friends.

It was very odd and embarrassing . We never worked out the real cause though. He was a rescue dog so we didn't know part of his history.

Bumblebeeinatree · 31/05/2024 20:29

CaliforniaCookie · 31/05/2024 19:15

I was making plans to visit one of my best friends.
She is white and I'm mixed race.

She told me she was concerned as her new dog who i haven't met, is racist.

Anytime he sees a person who is not white he goes mental.

This is honestly not a fake post.

Not sure how to respond. Advice welcome.

Dog doesn't like strangers, surprise!

cerisepanther73 · 31/05/2024 20:29

Yikes 😳 hope it's not one of those large aggressive dogs types
quite disturbing if this mumsnet thread is for real ?
@CaliforniaCookie

DonaldJohnTrump · 31/05/2024 20:27

My dog has put a Confederate Flag on his kennel.
Is that racist?
I hope not.
That might backfire bigly on my future plans...

cerisepanther73 · 31/05/2024 20:26

@CaliforniaCookie

L.o.l 🤣 is this attempt at being a bit spicy troll 🤔 or a wind up then?

quite perculair real Strange mumsnet thread this one isn't it

i suspose its the weekend and certain ones out there,
get bored and restless and make things up to get a reaction from posters online on websites like this

Just wondering as i am of afro Caribbean British ancestry myself,

Is this one of those yapping small dogs types like Jack Russell ect,

What breed is it then?

Yiked Really hope it's not a a large dog breed like a Rottweiler that's like that then??? !!!

Spudthespanner · 31/05/2024 20:26

CaliforniaCookie · 31/05/2024 20:16

Thankyou everyone, you have really made me laugh. I am glad this is actually quite a regular occurrence.
Just to clarify - SHE is Northern, I am Southern!

I will message her back and say I am willing to attempt the visit. I have a can of pet corrector that i used on my dog to stop his barking and I am quite a stern person when it comes to dog training. I am sure even if we can't overcome her dogs aversion to coloured people, she can lock it away in another room for the duration of my visit and I will try not to take it personally 😶

Why in god's name would you do this to a frightened animal?