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Original poster

To push ds into claiming

560 replies

Lacky301 · 31/05/2024 16:44

Ds has just finished uni and never worked through me and ex dp give him £450 a month between us plus I've always bought him the odd thing and gave a bit extra here and there.
Me and his dad are seperated and his dads just received notification that he will now be charged full council tax as ds has finished uni I'm under strain financially. I've told ds he needs to claim universal credit until he finds a job but he keeps saying I want my results first. Am I wrong in pushing him to claim to take some pressure off me and dp. Fwiw he would get around £370 per month as living at home.

OP posts:
amijustbeingsuspicious · 31/05/2024 17:30

Lacky301 · 31/05/2024 17:26

Well ds is holding off until he gets his results which probably shows he doesn't want to take tax payers money and get a job instead.

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Honestly how are you not getting it? In the meantime he should get a different job. It’s so basic.

what is the fucking matter with people in this country now?

need money = WORK

he hasn’t even applied for any bloody jobs. My sister is 16 and has TWO weekend jobs. It’s not hard, she just went round with her CV and asked. Lots of her friends saying “you’re so lucky”. She’s not lucky, she just put in some effort

Pin0cchio · 31/05/2024 17:30

Getting work this time of year is easy. There's loads of seasonal part time work.

What he wants doesn't get a say. Just cut him off financially and leave him to it.

TeaKitten · 31/05/2024 17:28

Lacky301 · 31/05/2024 17:26

Well ds is holding off until he gets his results which probably shows he doesn't want to take tax payers money and get a job instead.

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He still expects to be bank rolled by you though, and that’s fine keep paying him - don’t push him into benefits.

BMW6 · 31/05/2024 17:28

Oh and anyone with a brain cell can fail to get jobs........if they dont want a job🙄

Original poster
Lacky301 · 31/05/2024 17:27

BMW6 · 31/05/2024 17:25

"Worked a couple of Festivals" 😂

Of course he did - he wanted the experience of being at Festivals!! The work was incidental!

You can't see what is staring you in the face.

I'll tell you what, YOU keep giving him £££££££ by all means - but don't you look to others for his handouts.

Can you explain don't look to others and how did this become a benefit bashing thread

OP posts:
Original poster
Lacky301 · 31/05/2024 17:26

TeaKitten · 31/05/2024 17:20

It’s not random, everyone is saying the same - he needs to get a job, any job, not claim benefits. He doesn’t need them and they aren’t there to tide over students once the bank of mum and dad starts to run dry.

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Well ds is holding off until he gets his results which probably shows he doesn't want to take tax payers money and get a job instead.

OP posts:
Graciiee · 31/05/2024 17:25

You said in your OP he's never worked, but now he has worked. He just needs a job like everyone else. But he won't want to get one while he's having his arse wiped and being handed £450 a month.

BMW6 · 31/05/2024 17:25

"Worked a couple of Festivals" 😂

Of course he did - he wanted the experience of being at Festivals!! The work was incidental!

You can't see what is staring you in the face.

I'll tell you what, YOU keep giving him £££££££ by all means - but don't you look to others for his handouts.

TeaKitten · 31/05/2024 17:25

Lacky301 · 31/05/2024 17:23

I'll say it again I agree he needs a job but I've seen people applying for all of the jobs mentioned and not get a single response.

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But you just said your son has managed to get some work recently, so this doesn’t apply to him does it. Now he has experience working with people he gets a bar/shop/cafe job.

travelallthetime · 31/05/2024 17:25

it took my 16 year old 2 days to get a job waiting on a weekend. He earns minimum wage but about £100 in tips a night......it is not difficult to get a job

Original poster
Lacky301 · 31/05/2024 17:23

TeaKitten · 31/05/2024 17:20

It’s not random, everyone is saying the same - he needs to get a job, any job, not claim benefits. He doesn’t need them and they aren’t there to tide over students once the bank of mum and dad starts to run dry.

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I'll say it again I agree he needs a job but I've seen people applying for all of the jobs mentioned and not get a single response.

OP posts:
flamebrick · 31/05/2024 17:21

I think unfortunately JSA will be a bit like a plaster over a bruise at this point. By the time it takes to get the claim assessed, much of the summer work that would be ideal for a young graduate hoping to start a new career in autumn will be gone. By all means encourage him to apply, but I think focusing all effort on picking up an interim summer job now is the quickest way to alleviate yourselves financial.

(Sorry for posting so much, but worked in EC for many years and it's always gutting watching a young person flounder and miss their opportunities for the year when they've worked so hard on their degree!)

Original poster
Lacky301 · 31/05/2024 17:21

BMW6 · 31/05/2024 17:17

Not nasty. Truthful. You want him to take money from workers so he doesn't have to bother.

You have failed to install a sense of self reliance, pride in himself and dignity.

In what way is that not an epic failure?

I give up with people on here tbh he has worked a couple of festivals recently so for those of you who think my ds is a layabout there you go.

OP posts:
IrritableVowel · 31/05/2024 17:20

Why doesn't he get a bar or restaurant job where he is living now until August? He will be able to earn plenty if he does full time. Bar work will give him time during the day to work on his CV, go to interviews etc. If he moves back home in August, he can look for another bar job closer to home. There is no need for him to be out of work

TeaKitten · 31/05/2024 17:20

Lacky301 · 31/05/2024 17:16

Well it seems we've failed at parenting despite having bought up a young man who has never been involved in crime and is respectful to people and went to uni and worked hard I find that posters comment very judgemental and random

It’s not random, everyone is saying the same - he needs to get a job, any job, not claim benefits. He doesn’t need them and they aren’t there to tide over students once the bank of mum and dad starts to run dry.

MissBPotter · 31/05/2024 17:19

If he tried to claim they will force him to look for a job and accept anything. Which is what he should be doing anyway. So he should do both. Quite ridiculous that he’s never worked given he must be at least 21. Most ppl I know including myself worked in the holidays or had a part time job through Uni.

You certainly should stop bankrolling him to such an extent.

Overthebow · 31/05/2024 17:17

QuickFinish · 31/05/2024 17:15

One of my DC had a coffee shop job while she was applying for a a grad job in finance. She was worried as she hadn't any actual work experience in the field of finance that she was applying for but in each interview the fact she could talk about her coffee shop seemed to be a really positive thing.

I think grad employers like applicants to show they aren't afraid of hard work.

Yes that’s exactly it, graduates don’t get very far without some work experiences. Any work experience is good, something to show you can keep a job, have the right attitude and have gained some transferable skills.

BMW6 · 31/05/2024 17:17

Not nasty. Truthful. You want him to take money from workers so he doesn't have to bother.

You have failed to install a sense of self reliance, pride in himself and dignity.

In what way is that not an epic failure?

Original poster
Lacky301 · 31/05/2024 17:16

Well it seems we've failed at parenting despite having bought up a young man who has never been involved in crime and is respectful to people and went to uni and worked hard I find that posters comment very judgemental and random

OP posts:
QuickFinish · 31/05/2024 17:15

One of my DC had a coffee shop job while she was applying for a a grad job in finance. She was worried as she hadn't any actual work experience in the field of finance that she was applying for but in each interview the fact she could talk about her coffee shop seemed to be a really positive thing.

I think grad employers like applicants to show they aren't afraid of hard work.

amijustbeingsuspicious · 31/05/2024 17:15

Lacky301 · 31/05/2024 17:12

Exactly which is why I mentioned him claiming universal credit also people on here are saying they can get a job same day but it's not always that straight forward. Also ds has said he will take a random job until he finds one in his field

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If he actually pulls his finger out he could 100% find a menial job quicker than getting access to benefits

PiggieWig · 31/05/2024 17:15

If he signs on the Jobcentre will push him to look for a job, so it might hurry him along a bit if the support from you and his dad isn’t there.
It sounds like he’s quite comfortable for the time being.

Overthebow · 31/05/2024 17:15

Has he had a part time job whilst at school or uni or a summer job or internship? If so can he just go back to that for a bit? If not he has bigger problems then getting his CV sorted and he should just get any job whilst he gains some work experience.

SummerInSun · 31/05/2024 17:14

He or you or both of you have woefully misunderstood how the graduate employment market works. As PP have said, the graduate job schemes recruit while you are in your final year, and generally the offer is conditional on passing. It's like uni - yo don't wait to have your A level results to apply.

What is his degree? What sort of jobs is he looking for?

Original poster
Lacky301 · 31/05/2024 17:13

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That's just nasty and uncalled for

OP posts:
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