To wonder what’s the point when I’m left with this after bills?

It's a push during the nursery years but if you stick through it then your childcare costs reduce, you've been in the role and progressing so your salary may increase and then you'll find yourself with much more disposable income.

I think what probably feels hard OP is that before DC you were used to a lot more disposable income so it made work feel more like it was worth it. I would say the point now is that you’re paying into your mortgage and you’re keeping going in a career which are both long term goals. What’s the alternative really? Don’t work and then you can’t pay into a mortgage and you don’t have a career to go back to when nursery fees are no longer a concern?
Im confused though even with the high nursery and mortgage where does everything else go as the numbers don’t really add up

It would take me over 3 years to make your annual salary.

isn’t that below minimum wage?

Your child is at nursery, they don’t need an adventure park day and will not remember it.
Get out to the local park with a picnic they will have just as much fun.

Well, the point is to pay your bills so that your child is looked after and you have a roof over your heads, in a house you can keep warm and dry, with enough to eat. If you didn’t have that income, you wouldn't have the things you do.

Gently, OP, you're being ridiculous. You are not failing because you can't afford a day at an adventure park. You own a home, you're paying your bills, and you're feeding your child. I'm sure you can find plenty of free/cheap stuff to do at weekends - a nursery aged child does not need expensive days out.
Stop comparing yourself to your friends.

It would take me over 3 years to make your annual salary.

Give your head a shake and put your life into perspective.

£70k is the same as a couple each earning £30.5k. Suddenly people wouldn't call you a high earning household then....

But anyways OP, the point is you are buying a house that in the future you will own. The childcare bill is only temporary and that's what's crippling you. You're in a very fortunate position as far as being a single parent goes, as most single parents can't afford to run all of what you do without a second wage.

God can people not let someone have a moan and a rant

Apparently not, unless you’re poor but of course someone who is poor in the UK is still rich vs other parts of the world so basically no one can ever moan.

You have to view childcare as a temporary evil.

I earn less than half what you do, but I have about £1000 per month disposable income because I have no childcare costs any more. It doesn't last forever.

No she earns over the child benefit threshold and as you say legally any father doesn't have to pay nursery fees at all.

She hasn't mentioned a father and potentially that would be a way to increase income if she isn't receiving maintenance.

God can people not let someone have a moan and a rant. Maybe @ReLOa is having a bad day/week. The feelings are valid! @ReLOa im a new single parent on just over 40k and although I have no childcare I have a high rent. I have savings of quite a bit and yet I still worry. It’s ok to worry and despair. I hope you see the light soon.

I’m about to go to my friend’s house - she’s a single mum with 4dc earning a school TA salary. I can only imagine her reaction to this thread.

Do you think her housing & childcare costs are in line with the OP?

The point of work is to be able to pay your bills. Which you can, with lots left over.

That doesn’t make sense, lots of people don’t earn enough despite working to pay their bills?

Your friend will be entitled to all sorts of benefits that OP went access and you may actually find your friend is better off disposable income wise.

The point of work is to be able to pay your bills. Which you can, with lots left over.

Nobody gets 70k on benefits

Sole income so taxed more

The majority of households have lower income than op, even 2 people households.. That doesn’t mean the OP is better off, that’s just a measure of
PAYE income whereas loads have other income streams and many have lower housing costs.

I just don’t understand the race to the bottom personally.

I had 3 dc in nursery and fuel was crazy expensive in that period (similar to prices now). Interest rates were over 5%. Her mortgage is very similar.

The majority of households have lower income than op, even 2 people households. I just think people are so unaware on this site and feel worse of than everyone else. I’m about to go to my friend’s house - she’s a single mum with 4dc earning a school TA salary. I can only imagine her reaction to this thread.

I’m assuming you get Child Benefit?
Single Occupancy Council Tax Discount?
Child Maintenance for DC father? In an ideal world he should be paying half the nursery fees as his salary won’t have been compromised by having a DC. Why does childcare always seem as the woman’s expense I.e. coming out of the woman’s salary? Surely we need to get away from this, it should be a JOINT cost because the man cannot work without childcare either? Sorry that just annoys me, so unless your DCs father is looking after him 2 1/2 days a week he should be paying half the fees.

Are you kidding right now???

I'm.in care. I have £200 left if I'm lucky. I'm happy with that. Everything I like doing is free.

£570 and you still haven't got enough!!!! Jeez!!!

But OP's situation will be very short lived, not long term.

@ComtesseDeSpair yep!