To wonder what’s the point when I’m left with this after bills?

If you think you'll have more than £570 on benefits, go for it. You'll need to give up your home ownership though as you won't get money for the mortgage. Enjoy renting in the current climate. Then you'll have all day free to spend the thousands of pounds you think you'll get.

I believe the tax free childcare your definitely entitled to so that will be over £360 a month towards your childcare.

Tax free childcare is £500 every 3 months max. Definitely worth doing if OP isn't already, but not £360 a month.

I can't believe the lack of sensitivity on here tbh.... I want to say your doing fantastic, your buying a house as a single parent, your raising child and paying for everything they need. The nursery fees are extortionate but not forever. I don't know how old your child is but you fall within the pay limit for 30 hours free childcare, and I believe the tax free childcare your definitely entitled to so that will be over £360 a month towards your childcare. Just open a childcare account.

You've worked hard to get where you are in your Job, keep going because of that. Taking time out can mean it's hard to get back in down the line. Well done for working hard and being successful in life. This will pay off so well for you when your kids are all grown up.

Nappies are £5, wipes are 65p a pack, washing tablets are £10 but last a month, dishwasher tablets again 10 but last a month, bubble bath is £3 and lasts a month

No where near as rude as the poster who went out of her way to kick the boot into a woman struggling. It’s about time these posters were called out with like for like comments.

I think that’s rude.

Thats an average salary and a good salary for most parts of the country.

I’m sure if that poster was in a position to earn more then she would.

Wow there's a lot of green eyed people here who only extend empathy to those on lower incomes. Higher earning professionals, in stressful jobs, who are also single parents, according to Mumsnet should just shut up 🤷

I’d love to have a mortgage I have £120 left over after bills and spend £1400 in rent! I’d love to own a house but will never happen. I think a lot of people are in a similar position just have to cut back where you can.

Washing powder is £5ish for 2 weeks worth, bubble bath £1 which lasts a couple of weeks, nappies £4 per jumbo pack if you’re not fussy about using pampers, wipes 60p per pack, dishwasher tablets £4 a pack again lasts a good couple of weeks. That’s £10ish for the week being generous. We have a 3 year old and a baby so very used to the costs of young children. We formula feed too and still get the weekly shopping in under £100 a week for 2 adults and 2 kids.

£570 wouldn't even cover our monthly food bill as a family of 3, nevermind everything else besides. It absolutely is not "loads"

Yeah I get it but at 70k she's working in demanding job that probably took a lot of effort to get into. I think it's natural for her to feel a bit disheartened?

I come from country where childcare is heavily subsided and treated as important part of infrastructure. Women just keep their jobs and their salaries and its great for equality, economy and productivity. It's like that everywhere in Europe.

We need to stop normalising UK astronomical childcare costs and stop telling women they should be happy they are not starving when they earn great salary and pay a lot of taxes.
The problem is not women's attitude or their lack of budgeting skills. The problem lies with the system.

You’re being disingenuous because very obviously OP would be in a much better position if she lived with a partner who worked full-time - even just splitting the monthly mortgage repayment. Yes, the utility bills would be higher than what she’s paying now but not by much - again they’d be split. It’s very draining, financially and emotionally, when all of those bills are on you.

I dunno. I'm on 35k a year and a lone parent and I had about the same as you left over every month. Got a bit of universal credit but even that didn't take my income to anywhere near 70k a year. Rent £950, childcare £1500, one holiday a year. OK, I'm very frugal, but you must be able to cut back somewhere.

Hi OP are you claiming your 30 free hours? And your tax free childcare?

Are you claiming child support from the father if your not you should.

I want to say hang on in there, when they go to school life will be alot easier. I know it seems a long way off but it flies by.

It sucks I know. However the beauty is that this is not forever. Childcare costs are not forever. Treading water for a bit.

I’m a single parent to two teens, earning 30k.

Also can’t understand why people are clutching to the £900 as being entire household etc cost. It is shit to be in a stressful job and not be able to afford any kind of holiday ever and worry about not being able to build a buffer for boiler breakdowns etc

I don't think it's just for food. I imagine it's for miscellaneous items as well. Eg currently my bathroom is leaking so I need to pay a plumber.
So I think it's manageable but tight just because things always go wrong! It's short term only though.

Your figures are definitely wrong. There's no way OP is bringing home 4200 per month unless she's not contributing to a pension or her tax rate is wrong. You've also not considered fuel, gas, water, electric, car maintenance/lease, insurance, broadband. Why are you jumping down her throat when she's clearly stressed and looking for support? OP also mentions a stressful job. Being a single parent in a stressful job and unable to see even half your paycheck each month due to bills will be stressful on anyone.

OP please remember that after nursery is done your position will improve dramatically. I know that might not feel great now, but it's definitely worth reminding yourself of it.
In the meantime, is there anything you can do about the stressful work? Go to another company? A sideways move within the same one?
I saw someone mentioned putting small bits of money aside each month for different things. I think that's a great idea. How about putting £25 aside each month and saving it for a spa day?

Yeah I'm not sure that amounts to the difference in 2 x 35k salaries compared to 1 x 70k salary. I've just put it into a tax calculator and it works out about an extra £500 a month because there is no 40% tax, and 2 personal allowances not 1.

Thats before you factor in that a couple on 35k each would get child benefit so another 100 ish a month. Not to mention that between 2 of you there is more options to cover some childcare needs etc.

A lot of food comes in bulk which makes it harder for 1 adult....I hated this when I was single, fruit and veg etc, not designed for 1 person a lot of time.

I am in a couple but absolutely not naive to how hard it is financially to be single. I think ppl hear 70k and are jealous but as someone up thread said, it's the equivalent of a couple earning 30k each (not 35k because of the tax) - no one would think they were rolling in it if paying for childcare.

Where is the child maintenance from the father of your child?

People do get the equivalent of £70k on PAYE.

Jeez I have literally nothing left. In my bank at the moment I have £19. My phone bill isn't even paid. I've had to set up a "promise to pay" double next month. And I have to get my shopping on my dad's credit card that I will pay back next month too. I'd feel like I'm rich if I had over £500 left over after everything is paid 🤣 I work in the NHS too and single mum to a teen.

But that's disingenuous. I have a partner and 3 kids and don't buy washing powder, bubble bath or dishwasher tablets each week. More like once a month if that!

Bubble bath is a luxury and isn't required. Washing powder will last for ages.

My weekly shop for 5 people is on average £100/wk. Granted we dont eat much meat.

It's tight now, but in a year when you can get funding it will be better and then when they start school, you'll be laughing.

Most people have to sacrifice in the early years, it's normal. Cut your cloth and look forward to brighter days ahead.

I think you're making bad decisions is you're only on £26k.