Bringing a SEN child to an expensive holiday

Go go go! I used to be embarrassed about my autistic DD’s behaviour and then I just got over it - you see all sorts of behaviour and he does indeed have a right to enjoy a nice holiday.

My dd made a huge mess in several lovely Spanish paradores when she was younger and the staff couldn’t have been nicer. Same when I had to take her out screaming from a restaurant.

Absolutely go on holiday! Enjoy it 🌞

Cruising is also a great shout - usually very well set up for children and adults with a wide range of additional needs.

If I was on holiday and a child was stimming at the next dinner table or on the sunbed next to me I would think they have as much right to be there as me and I wouldn’t give it a second thought.

I can understand where your dh is coming from though because I guess he wants to feel relaxed and ultimately that’s important. But he needs to remind himself you guys have as much right to take up space in this world as anyone. I hope you have a lovely holiday.

Go on your hols… if people are bothered, tough luck.

We go cruising, and there are adults and children with a range of needs - I’ve never seen anyone bat an eyelid.

Who are these people going to family friendly ai resorts for peace and quiet?

Of course you should go if you want, but I also think that if either you/DH are going to spend the week stressed and worried, it may be worth thinking of other options. It's not much of a holiday otherwise.

If it’s IKOS or Sani or the like, I wouldn’t have any concerns. These resorts are big and there are lots of options for pool / beach etc. if someone doesn’t like the noise, they will have plenty of options to move to. Similarly, there will be lots of variety for you all to try different places / things. These resorts are set up for luxury holidays for families - with all that children and families bring.

Please go and enjoy it. Anyone that is bothered can move on.

Totally agree with you regarding more Mediterranean attitudes to children and noise. I'm also from this kind of background and it is much more relaxed

His logic makes no sense! So what he's saying is people who can't afford expensive holidays deserve to have their holidays disturbed?
Also I doubt he'd cause a massive disturbance, most people (I'd hope) would have compassion, I think kids disturbing you is usually secondary to the absolute rage you feel towards parents not managing their kids. So a new born baby or toddler tantrum is far more palatable when their parents are helping or doing their best, even with no success the noise is somehow more manageable. Similarly if a child has clear SEN its easier somehow for your brain to accept any disturbance, instead of a NT child screaming because their parents are knocking back poolside mojitos.

Ikos? Take him. You'll all love it.

Please go.

Enjoy every minute. Your money is as good as your fellow travellers. Kids are noisy anyway and families will be too busy looking after their own and those without will be happy they don't have to run after kids!

Anyone with a problem, well so what.

I do agree though that Spanish, Turkish, Greek etc are much more tolerant.

As a mum to a high needs disabled child I would be more than willing to sink my teeth into them if necessary. Money doesn't buy them the right to dictate what others do, not in the situation OP describes.

OP, we take our disabled son to Martinhal resorts and have never had an issue, which I'm relieved about but I would literally go to war for my son if necessary and don't feel intimidated by people that think they are better than me.

I hope you decide to go and that you all have a wonderful holiday.

I'd like to believe that any decent human being will understand and generally they do (parent of an SEN child myself). Holiday resorts are full of noisy kids, much more so than your DC. Please don't worry and just have an amazing time! ✨️

I'm on holiday with my largely non verbal autistic child at the moment. He loves the pool and beach and is swimming/paddling all day.
All inclusive is great because you can grab your child some food immediately- no waiting/ordering etc. and generally pretty relaxed.
I say go for it. I would choose somewhere with a couple of pools/a beach/ a couple of eating options so if your child gets frustrated/restless in one place you can try somewhere else.

I wouldn't if it is going to be stressful for you and or DH. You both deserve to be as least stressed as possible.

Yes absolutely! I'm in a similar situation by the way as my daughter is also non verbal autistic. I'm taking her to Jersey and Tenerife this year, and can't wait!Our children have as much of a right and place in this world as everyone else.

I'd be very, very careful of families who are wealthy. Their kids will be at schools where their experience of neuro diversity is likely to be autistic savant or mild dyslexia. They won't have the compassion and shrug shoulders "that's just Henry" approach that their state peers do.

Definitely take him, don’t let other people’s attitudes or perceived attitudes get to you. He- and you- are just as entitled to go on a nice holiday as someone who doesn’t have SEN. Enjoy!