How would you split holiday cost?

"Money is tight" means "I cant do everything I want to do if I have to allow for the same budget for my wife to have a holiday of her own".

Selfish git, I would ask for half of the cost and use it to book another shorter trip for the two of you later in the year.

Oh I like this!

Include all costs like parking and split between three. You pay 2/3.

That’s fair. Then you can treat her whilst away if you want to.

Ask him for one third. £630
Keep the difference in cost. £130
Give the rest in cash to your sister. £500
It looks like she might need some money of her own.

So we are saying that OP should be compensated for spending time with her sister because she’ll be an inconvenience?

@Obeseandashamed @SunGoesIntoHiding

Your sister is unable to work and says that money is tight and yet her husband can afford hobbies and multiple holidays without her? Huge red flags. I would be thinking this could be financial abuse and how cruel of him to holiday without her, knowing she is desperate to go away.

However you decide to split the costs I would be using this trip to make sure your sister knows that she has your support and that her husbands behaviour is not ok, not by a long shot.

The extra person on the holiday changes the dynamics and they are sharing the room too so it DOES impact OP and her DCs holiday and they should have a “benefit” from that in the form of a reduced holiday price by charging the third person an appropriate share not just saying “oh well it only added £130” as that isn’t taking account of the change in holiday circumstances! (id rather pay the extra £130 that share my accommodation with a third person and have to consider their needs wants and wishes during my break for instance).

Reading between lines you aren’t happy with how your BIL is treating your DSis (eg why if she’s desperate for holiday hasn't he taken her, why is money tight when Op tries to do things with DSis but there is plenty for BIL’s hobbies). I’d start with saying 1/3rd of the holiday is What he is due for his wife’s place. He sounds financially abusive.

£500 seems fair. OP is effectively taking her sister along on a holiday because her sisters husband would rather have a holiday on his own instead with her. Nobody is considering the fact that OP will have to factor her sister in to everything that she will do on her holiday.

I would ask for £600 and then use some of it for an excursion or day out for all three of you.

Also to add, its none of OPs business what the financial arrangements are. Presumably DS is still happily with DH and isn't crying financial abuse, its not up to OP to seek to claim that money back from him.

I wouldnt be pleased if my DSis took it upon themselves to charge my DH more because they decided he deserved to pay it. She is aware of their current arrangements, if she's got a problem with the way her family finances are handled then she needs to take it up herself.

Reflecting on this I think you're out of line to 'charge' anymore than the extra £130/£150. I'd tell them that cost and then tell them they'll need a good amount of spending money for the trip.

Actually, I say £600 and then save some to do nice things with your sister afterwards.

Have fun. Her DH sounds like a doll (not)!

I've noticed you've mentioned OP that it's cheap for the summer holidays - but as DS isn't bringing a child with her then surely they are only going in the school holidays to cater for your child.

If money is tight than £500 could be a lot. I get that you've said DH seems to go away more but you don't necessarily know the financial arrangements of that. And a holiday with you and your little boy (free place means young right?) Isn't exactly going to be relaxing spa break for her, she's naturally going to be helping with your son.

When people come with me places to help with DD I always pay for their place. I just took my parents away to Centre parcs with us and wouldn't dream of asking them for money when they are helping a bit with DD and also have her other times.

I would just tell him what the holiday cost and see what he offers. He might offer to split it 3 ways in which case you'll get your £500. But if DS is coming and is able to help with the child/keeping you company I wouldn't necessarily set my eyes on the £500. Especially if it might have been proposed as 'I'm going away and it's only £100 to add my sister on'

He might also be expecting it to be a joint present.

If it’s only cost you £130 to add her, why do you want £500? Bit of a piss take that isn’t it?

The difference

I agree.

Tell him what the total cost is... be grateful for any contribution... spend some of it on your sister.

Don't let him off the hook.... he never takes his wife on holiday.

Bear in mind that these ‘free’ child’s spaces aren’t really free.

No, this one isn’t. It’s £130. Still a bargain.

If husband is seeing this as a birthday present to her, then you asking for more feels a bit like you’re stealing her present, unless you’re planning on giving her the difference? If he pays you £500, he’s unlikely to get her anything else as that’s a decent spend on her. If he pays you £130 he might buy her something else, or give her money to get some new holiday clothes, or extra spending money for when there. It feels really weird to me that you get to profit off whatever you decide your sister’s present should be. The only reason you should ask for more is if you plan on giving your sister the cash directly. Even if you spent it on fun things whilst there, it’ll still seem like it’s come from you rather than it actually being money from him.

Not at all … there will be an extra person sleeping in the 1 bed accommodation so that will be worse… it’s only fair they pay a decent amount as getting a weeks all inclusive holiday after all.

I think it'd be really immoral to pocket £500 when adding your sister to the booking only increased the price by £130. Request the £130 & spending money for her to pocket, not you.

£500 sounds good to me to

I would split it three ways (so £600) and IF you can afford it I would then use that money to take her away on a mini break later this year as your birthday present to her.

I think £500 is fair

Child is half adult price, unless a teen.

Therefore adults cost around £750 each and child costs £350 (approx figures).

On this basis, , £500 seems fair, as you were going anyway.

It's clearly £130. Asking for £500 is asking your sister to subsidise your holiday.

The only circumstance in which I would ask for more than £130 would be if I thought her husband was financially abusive and wouldn't give her any spending money. Then I'd keep up to £130 (if I needed it) and give her the rest.