How would you split holiday cost?

Read the whole thread.

"The family" isnt hard up, the sister is hard up because her husbands spends a lot on his hobbies and holidays so there is no money spare for the sister. "Money is tight" means "I dont want to spend it on her as I want to spend it on me".

The sister is borderline financially abused. She is certainly kept short.

I can't imagine asking for £500, from my hard up sister's family, for something that only cost me £100.

What do you think is a reasonable amount for my sisters husband to pay?

This is where its gone wrong. If your sister is disabled and in receipt of benefits, she has her own income. It's her money.

Why do you need to ask her husband?

If she can't access her money, that's a totally different problem.

I think £350 for a week away is a bargain. We paid £650 each this year.

Perhaps OP you could invite me next time?

You asked your disabled sister to go on holiday with you and it cost an extra £50. Moneys tight for her but her but you are asking for £500??? Am I right. Her husband goes away all the time on his own???? You both sound absolutely horrible. Is she being taken as the babysitter.

Bit of a tight bastard

Does your sister have to ask him for his permission to go on holiday because it is his money? It's giving financial abuse

from comments the OP has made, it sounds like hell would freeze over before he did that

Personally, if money is tight for her and if you were going to go anyway I would treat her. Or let her just pay the difference in price to add her....

But she’s already booked it before broaching the subject and she’s felt the need to ask on here so it’s not that obvious.

were you going to directly approach him and ask for money (and if so how much were you going to ask for?

OP isn’t going in blond, she knows their lifestyle and what the could afford.

Week with friend A - 4* all inclusive as standard
Friend B 3 nights in a B&B with cheap flights

it’s not difficult to gage

If the OP went with just her son she would have more space and choice in sleeping arrangements. She is now sharing this with her DS so husband should contribute more than just the difference between two/three person person. £500 is a win win situation. DS gets a lower price holiday (ie less than half price of two adults) and OP benefits from free child space.

Hang on, why did you book this holiday before agreeing who was paying what?

I was initially under the impression that you booked it as you wanted to take your sister away. As you are not only wanting to recoup the entire amount, but also want whatever birthday money the BIL is willing to give, then clearly you were never intending to pay her portion. In that case then, what were you expecting to happen if BIL hadn’t volunteered to put to? Were you going to charge your sister (and if so how much?) were you going to directly approach him and ask for money (and if so how much were you going to ask for?) or were you planning on paying it initially but have now seen an opportunity to use her birthday as profit? I don’t understand how you booked and paid for a holiday that you expected them to pay for without at any point discussing the cost of it in advance.

£500 is plenty. You could have not invited her, and it seems without your invite she wouldn't have a holiday.

As an aside, I would not have booked with this company. In this country the company would be breaking equality laws by insisting on couples. The rule discriminates against single parents, crap really. If it is this country then they should be reported, I am willing to do that if you wish to DM me.

But you are paying £130 extra, to get a “free” child place! Yes your sister should contribute, otherwise there is no point in her going with you

I think I’d just treat my sister, if I could afford to, and suggest to her husband that he uses the money for them to do something (go away?) together.

I’m amazed how many people jump to the BIL being financially abusive with little to no information. I’m not saying he’s not, but the info isn’t enough to conclude that. we need more information, like what holidays is he going on? 2 weeks in Thailand is a lot different in cost to a one night golf break, for instance, and what else does he pay for in the relationship? Have they agreed to split their finances completely? There are too many unknowns to jump to that huge conclusion.

i think £500 is too much, but £130 is too little. There are small negatives to the sister coming along, such as loss of privacy, activities, meal time considerations etc, and that should be factored in. Rather than how much the sister is getting out of it, I’d look at how much your holiday would be affected and devalued. I think £250-£300 feels fair.

Or say full amount is £1880…. A third is slightly over £625 but I’m happy to call it £500

Well I’d be telling him the pull cost and state that son is free… and ask if he’s happy to pay a third

I'd say that the holiday cost £1800 with a free child place but wouldn't have been much cheaper if she hadn't come and let him decide. I think anything from £500-900 is fair. I'd assume he's not thinking it cost £500 and his contribution would be £100...

You probably need to let him know total cost to prevent embarrassment. If he thinks it's a £1000 holiday and you ask for £500 it's completely different in terms of ratio!

Just be mindful that a free child’s place doesn’t usually include the flight, just the hotel. I’d say get the prices for the flight and split into 3rds and then split the hotel cost in half.

We will have to agree to disagree, they both benefit and the OP is still suggesting she pay significantly more. There aren't loads of details but her sister is said to be desperate to get away and seemingly doesn't get the opportunity with her DH, the op was happy to take her child alone yet everyone assumes she'd want adult company (and for some reason should pay for it) but maybe she isn't bothered about that? We don't know but I doubt her sister will feel hard done by if her DH was to pay half price for a holiday and no single person occupancy charge. Most people would be quick to snap that offer up.

Also, where has everyone got that the BIL is financially abusing her sister? I can't find anything that says that?! He goes away without her but could be stag do's, work trips, friends special birthday, wellness retreat. OP didn't say he was a bad husband, did she?

OP is completely disingenuous. She gets adult company on holiday and at the very least a second pair of eyes keeping an eye on her child for a £130.

There's no way you (general you) can spin that so that sister or sister's husband should stump up £500.

I think 500 sounds fair. You can either use it towards the cost of the holiday or use it while on holiday to do some extra things you may not have done otherwise. Not really understanding why if things are tight for them that he can afford to go on holidays though.