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Original poster

Sitting around on bed during the day

134 replies

Ferngardens · 29/05/2024 17:13

Fed up of my husband sitting around on the bed all the time. He just sits there reading or on his phone for hours over the week. Especially in day clothes I don't think it's very nice, plus bad for his back and the bed surely. I get why kids hang around in their rooms but think it's something people grow out of surely. I wish he'd find a chair or something to do! It annoys me when there's piles of washing on the bed and he's just there scrolling away. I feel like I can't go in the bedroom because he's just hanging around on the bed and it's irritating.

OP posts:
Londonscallingme · 29/05/2024 19:25

yabu focusing on where he is sitting in particular (he’s a grown man, he can sit on his bed, day clothes or not). However, it sounds like the bigger problem is that he’s lazy and not pulling his weight.

bluetopazlove · 29/05/2024 19:21

AmelieTaylor · 29/05/2024 19:06

@bluetopazlove

oh the irony, he's on his phone, you're posting on here?

you must need a life too!!

Show quote history

Oh The irony my life is likely done in a few weeks time don't be to keen , my
NHS bed turns up next week .

ilovepixie · 29/05/2024 19:19

I love lying relaxing on my bed reading or whatever with my dog curled up beside me.

AbsolutelyFemale · 29/05/2024 19:17

I love chilling on my bed. Leave the poor guy alone ffs

amijustbeingsuspicious · 29/05/2024 19:15

But if you don’t lie on your bed during the day, where do you go to hide from your children?! 😀

when DH has them and I get a break I am up the stairs at warp speed

K0OLA1D · 29/05/2024 19:14

Worsthotel · 29/05/2024 19:12

See, now if any loved one of mine did that I'd be worried rather than annoyed.

That's not the behaviour of a happy person engaged with family life.

Eh? Me and dp have been at work all day. Done our house chores. The kids are having a whale of a time in the extension on roblox with their mates on a WhatsApp call. There's naff all on the TV and a new Stephen King book come out last week.

Worsthotel · 29/05/2024 19:12

See, now if any loved one of mine did that I'd be worried rather than annoyed.

That's not the behaviour of a happy person engaged with family life.

AmelieTaylor · 29/05/2024 19:11

Thepeopleversuswork · 29/05/2024 17:47

I wouldn’t particularly care whether it was a bed or a chair and I don’t get the taboo about “day clothes” on the bed at all.

But I think grown adults who piss their free time away scrolling are lame as fuck and I would hate that.

@Thepeopleversuswork

and another one!!

it's ok for you to piss about on MN, but not for him to do what he wants on his phone?? I don't think you have the high ground here.

AmelieTaylor · 29/05/2024 19:10

Harara · 29/05/2024 17:41

Does he have a job? Does he WFH? Is he doing this within working hours, or outside them?

@Harara

DO YOU have a job? Do YOU WFH? Are YOU posting in/out of work hours?

jesus, why are you judging him for scrolling on his phone, but it's ok for you??

PassingStranger · 29/05/2024 19:07

I like my bed it's more comfortable.

AmelieTaylor · 29/05/2024 19:06

bluetopazlove · 29/05/2024 17:36

What an odd thing for an adult to do ? Does he not have a life ?

@bluetopazlove

oh the irony, he's on his phone, you're posting on here?

you must need a life too!!

abracadabra1980 · 29/05/2024 19:04

It's my favourite place to decompress from the day. I need alone time. And it's 10 x more comfy than my sofa. Happy to socialise downstairs, but need my own space/time in my room. I used to be most pissed off when exDH interrupted or joined me 😆

AnnaMagnani · 29/05/2024 19:00

What's wrong with adults hanging out and reading in bed? While wearing clothes?

This is a daily activity in my house Hmm

K0OLA1D · 29/05/2024 18:57

Boiledeggsandsoldiers · 29/05/2024 18:50

It’s not really where he does it that matters so much is it, surely it’s more that he spends hours on his phone avoiding family life? Very cheeky not to put away the clean laundry too.

Garden sheds, workshops, and studies have been used for years by men to avoid domestic duties.

What is he trying to avoid? Why has he got hours of time to do this?

I have hours of time to do it. My house is clean and tidy. All the washing is done. Some needs putting away but the kids can do their own when they go to bed. We've all been fed. The dishes are done. The dogs happy.

Nonewclothes2024 · 29/05/2024 18:56

I often lounge round on my bed. Reading , tv , scrolling. I work full time. House is clean and tidy.
In my clothes!
It's more comfortable and warmer up here.

Boiledeggsandsoldiers · 29/05/2024 18:50

It’s not really where he does it that matters so much is it, surely it’s more that he spends hours on his phone avoiding family life? Very cheeky not to put away the clean laundry too.

Garden sheds, workshops, and studies have been used for years by men to avoid domestic duties.

What is he trying to avoid? Why has he got hours of time to do this?

ObliviousCoalmine · 29/05/2024 18:47

I just feel like it's not what our bed is for, his lazy hangout place.

What an insane thing to have a bee in your bonnet about.

Beezknees · 29/05/2024 18:47

I don't do it all day every day but I usually sit on my bed rather in the living room when I'm at home. Don't know why, my bedroom is just cosier. I live in a flat though so it's all on one floor!

K0OLA1D · 29/05/2024 18:43

I can't get comfortable downstairs, so come 8 on a work night, sometimes before, I go to bed. Sometimes on, sometimes in. Weekends I don't normally come down until I've had a brew and a read. What do you want him to do instead? Sit on the sofa?

NoLostCause · 29/05/2024 18:40

I don't see what's weird about it? I'm lying on my bed at the moment, reading Mumsnet on my phone. I've also had a scroll through Instagram and looked up train times for tomorrow. I'm in day clothes/loungewear. I've just put some washing away and have grabbed five minutes while DH bathes the kids.

mynameiscalypso · 29/05/2024 18:31

I would always hang out on my bed if I wanted to read/dick about with my phone/watch TV/work/study. I didn't realise I was that unusual. I have always used my bed for that kind of thing since I was a teenager. I don't do it to escape from family life particularly but if I have downtime - eg DH has taken DS out - I'll always head to the bed.

5128gap · 29/05/2024 18:29

My DP does this. Except he lies on the bed and springs into a sitting position when he hears me on the stairs.

iamabbyleemiller · 29/05/2024 18:23

Feeling attacked here Grin

I love some chill time on my bed but it’s because I feel a bit exposed sitting chilling in my living room. Even though I KNOW no one cares.

ginasevern · 29/05/2024 18:19

This is strange behaviour. I don't know of any adults that sit in their bedroom, unless perhaps it's also used as a work/study space. What is he looking at on his phone? Does he look anxious when you walk in? Is this every weekend and evening?

Original poster
Ferngardens · 29/05/2024 18:01

We do spend time together, but I'm usually getting stuff done and he's usually sitting around. This is the evening or weekend, we both work otherwise. I wouldn't mind if it's 10 mins but he can spend the whole afternoon. I just feel like it's not what our bed is for, his lazy hangout place.

OP posts: