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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think if one parent can't look after the DC, it's the other parents responsibility to do so?

431 replies

looop114 · 28/05/2024 21:41

And not their partners?

If two parents are separated and one of them becomes unwell (not just a cold but actually very poorly and unable to look after the DC kind of unwell), it should be automatically the other parents responsibility to look after the children and not the unwell parents partner or spouse?

They can if they want to obviously but the initial assumption should be that the other parent will parent their children even though its not "their time" when the other is not able to? Providing both are involved parents.

Aibu to think this is the case and that it's quite entitled to make assumptions that your co parents partner/spouse will look after your DC when the other parent is unwell intstead of you?

OP posts:
Original poster
looop114 · 28/05/2024 21:46

StartingOverInMy40s · 28/05/2024 21:44

Exactly this.

I'd happily look after my partners two children and have done many times. We're a family so why would I not?

Show quote history

As I say if you want to that's fine but where both parents are involved the first assumption would be that their actual mother would look after them rather than just assume that you will because your husband can't? And vice versa

OP posts:
Singleandproud · 28/05/2024 21:46

I guess technically it is for the ill parent to make childcare arrangements for their child on their time whether that's partner, grandparents, other family or friends unless they have an agreement of offering the other parent first refusal.

I suspect in most families the other parent would want their children back with them rather than looked after by others

StormingNorman · 28/05/2024 21:45

Are we talking about unwell for a week or two or a long term illness?

StartingOverInMy40s · 28/05/2024 21:44

OhHelloMiss · 28/05/2024 21:43

I think it's different for different families

No right or wrong way at all!

Exactly this.

I'd happily look after my partners two children and have done many times. We're a family so why would I not?

Thepeopleversuswork · 28/05/2024 21:44

Of course YANBU. But a lot of men whose marriages have failed recruit new partners largely based on their perceived gullibility and the likelihood that they will become proxy parents. And it is usually men.

What has prompted this?

OhHelloMiss · 28/05/2024 21:43

I think it's different for different families

No right or wrong way at all!