To have let another child ruin our afternoon?

This ^^

@Brefugee seriously? You’d say these things to a 5 year old child?

they’d also learn that some parents are ignorant twats.

Risking being locked up for unstable behaviour is a bit overkill, even if it does mean I ‘grow some ovaries.’ The child meant no harm but she was being intrusive and ideally her parent(s) would have noticed this and tactfully removed her but that isn’t what happened

I can't tell if you're being facetious here or really believe it @letsgoglamping

Either way, YABU. You acted like a drip so as not to offend a five year old and won't speak up in case you're locked up for unstable behaviour?! Give over woman. Next time, tell her to leave the baby alone and to go back to her mum or dad. You are your children's only advocate in these situations, and you're teaching them to be just as drippy as you.

Some parents are happy to have children play wth their children so unless you told the parents you were not they are not psychic, if you did not want the child I would have niceley asked the child where their parents were and took them to them

I get the situation was annoying at first but then you are the adult so you fix it

I don't see it like that. I think OP showed her children kindness by including a, seemingly, lonely child. It showed patience and tolerance of others. In the grand scheme of things OP, you may have made a little girls day and it was just one soft play visit. Your baby wouldn't know any different , and your 3 year old possibly quite liked having a new older friend? So, not what you had in mind but I'm sure you'll have other times when it's just you and your children. A PP saying they would shout "who's is this child, come and get it"?? Lol. As if.

And if you had had enough, which I can totally understand after that long. You can gently and kindly say, "Ok, we are going to play on our own for a little bit, you've been really kind to play with us. Say bye DC. "

Then again it's a soft play, there are kids everywhere and you can't dictate where they play. But of course, don't let other children pick yours up or have them sitting at your table if you don't want them to.

Anyway, I'd still look at the positives.

Her parent was not parenting her. They were being lazy.
Some people just want their kids out of their hair, and so it suits them to let them annoy others.
Don’t be embarrassed to take the child back and tell them you are trying to eat/spend time with your children.
They are the ones that should feel awkward.

Nope I wouldn’t have let it happen. Very firmly in a no-nonsense voice “you need to go and find your grown up now as we’re going to have lunch”. Followed a few times by “off you go then” if she was still hanging around. Failing that, go and find a member of staff to deal with the ‘lost child’.

should have marched her over to one of the staff & said she was lost

To be fair it's equally as dull watching your child swim as it is talk to a random child. (Swimming day was THE worst day).

Totally agree! I’m not a hoverer but I do carefully supervise my 2.5 year old as she’s so sociable and friendly. Would hate to think that other adults would think of her like this…totally get this child being a little much but she sounds quite sweet really.
Surprised at some of the comments on here!

Unless you're going to actually take it up with the parent, there's nothing you can do because tbh if you (general you, not you personally OP) haven't got the courage to address it with the adult, you shouldn't be taking the easy road of being 'harsh' with a small child who is too young to blame. So in a nutshell you've a choice, be assertive with the parent or put it down to bad luck and put up with it.

Do you literally mean no adult checked on a five year old for over two hours? And nor did the 5yo go and check in with their parent themselves? I find that mind boggling. I allow my kids (oldest is 4.5) to play together/independently at soft plays, parks etc and don’t appreciate other adults hovering, but I think five minutes is as long as I would happily go without eyes on them, and they’re usually back over every so often to update me on some detail of whatever game they’re playing before they rush off again. I’d notify the staff FAR sooner than two hours in if I observed a 5yo hadn’t linked in with an adult in that time.

A very firm ‘my baby needs some space please let her play on her own’ said with a smile and repeat.
At lunch a firm ‘we’re eating now so please go and play’ and just insist. If she won’t move find a member of staff.

But where were the parents????
Nearby??
I can't see how this kid for over 2 hours was neglected?? Very odd

Omg we used to get this all the time when I took my child to soft play, kids who cling on and follow us around! I'm trying to remember what we used to do, I think I used to point out another child to them and tell them to play with them!

That made me chuckle.

Yes to this.

Never been to ''Soft Play'' but they sound hideous - A small girl was bitten quite severely at one on the face while in a lavatory- by two older male children {where on earth were the parents?}

They sound{anecdotally} rather hellish places where children {obviously not OP's} are left to do their own thing while the adults look down at phones.

Attachment disorder? It's bizarre that a stranger's child should have begun to hang around with you , trying to get attention by picking your baby up.

Sounds very irritating, but it's not the girl's fault..Was her mother gawking down at her phone, rather than supervising her child?

I would have asked her to show me where her mummy is and dropped her “lost" child back to her personally.

I mean....no. Asking a child to find their parent is in absolutely no way the same as telling them to piss-off. I guess the result would be the same...they'd go away. But in one scenario they'd be hurt and upset and in the other completely fine and not atune to your dislike of them.

Honestly, it's really worth looking into some sort of communication training, how you phrase things really makes a big difference to the message you send.

Problem is OP, 99% of parents would have sent the 5yo back to their parent pretty sharpish. Particularly when eating lunch! So if you didn’t, the other parent probably assumed you were up for having them and were finding it useful to have another child in the mix to entertain your 2.

Because they want their children to play on the equipment? You can hardly hire a soft play for one or two children.

If you want your son to have company at soft play why not invite some of his friends to go with him rather than annoying other families?

“Right… show me who you’re here with, Honey!”
Go to said parent/guardian and say “I didn’t come here to look after her. She’s monstering my kid. Please get her to leave us alone.”

Do you have much experience with small children OP? Other than your own obviously. I mean cousins, nieces and nephews, friends children etc etc. Because honestly, the amount of times I’ve firmly told other children to leave mine alone, or play nicely, or share, or go find mummy now.. I mean I do it all the time! It’s not a big deal. Kids generally do what other grown ups tell them. They look to adults for boundaries and guidance, and as adults, we are supposed to give them this. You can’t let some random 5yo muck
about your baby and impose on a lunch with your two children! You have to be in charge and make sure you and your dc have the sort of day you wanted to have.