To have let another child ruin our afternoon?

🤣

This is one of the saddest threads I’ve read on MN because of the majority of responses

Yes it would have been a pain but she was obviously used to being ignored by her parents and wanted to engage in your family - because it looked nice.

She she wasn’t your responsibility but in the bigger schemes of things it’s not that bad is it?

This was probably me at 5 :(

I had a little girl do this with my dd (2). She kept trying to pick up my dd and was holding her hand which was sweet but then it moved onto her trying to kiss my dd. I firmly so no kissing thank you and she ran away upset and brought her mum back to me. When I explained the no kissing the mum was actually quite apologetic and reminded her dd not to touch younger children.
I just don’t think her mum realised she was being a bit of a bother.

In your shoes I’d have asked the little girl to play elsewhere for a while and then during your lunch I would have been firm and told her to go play as we are eating alone.

"I'm sorry lovely, we're busy over here so can't play right now. Please go and find your parents or off you go and play.".

Yeah right like you do this and if you do, shame on you. In what world is telling a 5 year old yo go away acceptable?

Classic MN post!

I would have asked who she was there with and taken her back to them as soon as she started to annoy me.

Hand her over to a staff member as a "lost" child. Problem solved.

"Time to go back to your mum now sweetheart. Go on now…"

"Go back to your parents, they'll be getting worried about you"

‘Ok, go and find your adult now 😀’

Failing that I’d walk around the place with her going ‘is this your child? Is this your child? She couldn’t find you’ etc. Genuinely have done that before 😄

Next time ask yourself which you prefer: being blunt with a child or having it tagging along with you. Make a conscious choice and live with it.

I think we’ve found the girls mum 😂😂

It seems bizarre the parents weren't looking out for her. Did you see them, speak to them?
When little kids are annoying me it's perfectly polite to say in a kind but firm voice 'no, you need to go back to mummy or daddy now. See you later. Bye bye' then wave her goodbye with a smile. Warmly and not sternly. If they hesitate just say 'go on, there you go' and point them away.
It's always worked for me, even with kids that seem a bit unruly.

I find this frustrating too op because really it's the parents fault for not supervising effectively and i don't want to hurt a child's feelings. Ds got this all the time when we were at soft play when he was younger and it really interfered with him being able to move around freely plus sometimes older kids aren't aware enough of themselves and could hurt a smaller child. Cracks me up when parents don't stop their older kids going into the baby section at soft play.

Often I just say something like, please don't pick the baby up he doesn't like it. Or he's learning how to crawl and he needs more space to practice so why don't you go play over there with the bigger kids or thanks for coming to say hello but we're going to get our lunch now so you should go find your grown up.

Sorry I just think if you go somewhere full of children then it is not unreasonable to assume that at some point you are going to have to interact with other people's children. I find this attitude towards children that are not your own bewildering. Stay at home then if you don't want to speak to anyone else. Or if children annoy you so much why bother having any? Also well done teaching your children on how to be rude and anti social.

I’ve got more bolshy with time. When DC1 was a baby/young toddler I would have quietly been annoyed but said nothing. Now I’m trying to manage two DC and I’m perpetually knackered I happily tell other kids how to behave if their parents aren’t around. I told a 5 yo at a messy play thing today to stop opening the water chutes when other kids are trying to fill up the containers. Mum glared at me but I couldn’t care less. 3 years ago I wouldn’t have dared say anything. I can’t be bothered picking up the pieces when it inevitably upsets/pisses off my kids.

Eurgh, we had this on holiday. A very sweet little girl practically moved in with us. Any time we were at the campsite she was there with us. Watching us eat, got her swim stuff as we got ours, watched us get dc ready for bed, joined any activity on site etc. I got her to show me her parents when she tried coming into our tent. I told the parents that I was concerned because we are strangers and it was getting a bit much. They offered us money for her drinks in the club house 😂 I’m not sure if it was cultural (we were in France and they were French?).

We ended up having to be very strict and saying no every time she came over.

I know all the other posts say the opposite but I feel like I would have been the same as you. Where I live telling a 5 year old to do one would probably be the catalyst for the mother of said child kicking off as well. 🙈

I have done the "go back to your parents now, don't touch my baby" loud enough for the mother to come and get the kid. More than once. I have never needed to escalate further because i'm not too wishy washy to make sure my own kids are ok and having the fun we planned.

Her parents should have been dealing with this. How annoying for you. I personally would have told her to go, but I get what you are saying, it is her family that should be telling her. We had this years ago at swimming lessons, a child who was always watching her older siblings was actively told by parents to go and talk to people on the gallery so they could get rid of her for five minutes. You then watched people having to talk to this child instead of seeing their children swimming.

It’s not mean to tell a 5 year old not to pick up your baby and that it’s time for them to go back to their grown up! It’s not fair on your own children not to.

As everyone else has said you just had to say where’s your
Mummy/Daddy? Ok you need to go back to them now, it’s been lovely playing with you. If she doesn’t go take her by the hand walk her back to her grown up (or a member of staff if you can’t find them) and say she’s been playing with us but my littlest is getting fed up of being picked up now and we’re now having lunch so I’ve brought her back, big smile, bye bye sweetie and you’re done.

You can either say nothing or be mean and tell a child to piss off?!

Whoah are you going to struggle when your child grows up! Might want to book onto a communication skills course. Gentle, but firm and clear is absolutely key to talking to children. I'd start practising now.

She shouldn't be picking up the baby- but did your older one enjoy having someone to play with? Personally, I usually liked it when my children made "playground friends"

Scared of a 5 year old. Another one to "how do some mumsnetters survive?"

I think it’s kind of hard at a public soft play place.
youl get lots of practice being firm with other peoples kids as you baby grows.
environments like this are great for both you and little one to navigate social interactions and boundaries.
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I would act all jolly with the five year old and ask her to point out her parents, then walk her over there and say to parents just returning Jessica as we are going to have lunch now and I’ didn’t want to leave her alone in the baby area
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some if the comments here? Why on earth would you take your kids somewhere like that if you don’t want other children interacting with them- so bizarre.