Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Pulling my hair is weird behaviour?

145 replies

thelastgoodbye · 28/05/2024 11:10

This bank holiday I went on a weekend away for my friends birthday, I know most of the people going but not all.

We got the train down and we’re all sat on the tables of 4 next to each other. They started talking about how they were doing their hair that evening and one had extensions and she said how difficult it was to style as her hair was so heavy. I simply agreed with her that yes when I had mine I had the same issue.

One of the women I don’t know, looked at me and said actually you can see your extensions, leaned across from the other table and yanked on my hair. I just looked at her bewildered and said “that’s my real hair, I don’t have extensions in anymore”

Aibu to think this is just odd behaviour? It was like she was trying to embarrass me

OP posts:
Cathbrownlow · 31/05/2024 10:57

Actually this has just reminded me of the time years ago when some twattish guy insisted that I was wearing contact lenses when I wasn't 🙄

MrsJackThornton · 31/05/2024 10:47

Richard1985 · 31/05/2024 10:28

It didn't last long😂

Show quote history

Yes because the important thing when women are talking about people crossing boundaries and touching them without consent is that the women make sure they are talking about it in a fun way 🙄

pizzaHeart · 31/05/2024 10:37

Tbh I would be furious if it’s my own mother !
Who the f* does this?

cerisepanther73 · 31/05/2024 10:35

@thelastgoodbye

As a black woman this can happen sometimes occasionally or often
par of the course having random stranger or someone you know vaguely or know well 🤔

Touch code word for =Grope/ interfere with your hair

Who think that it's Ok to touch your hair,
it's weird othering someone as different fetishism like,

Yes admire my hair style or type of hair but at a difference
Just like you do with Caucasian white folks women,

You don't know if someone who touches your hair goes to the toilet and does not wash their dirty hands after visting the toilets,

Or

If random or someone you know who touches your hair,
also has scratched their backside arse or picked their nose too,

You don't know if they have just touched your hair they have sweaty clammy hands or just eaten greasy 🤔 foods particles,

Or
If they have just sneezed on their hands ✋️ 🤧 too..

Waffle78 · 31/05/2024 10:32

Sounds like she was jealous of your real hair and saying it's not your hair anyway.

Fgfgfg · 31/05/2024 10:30

She showed herself to be a twat. I'd have told her to get her eyes tested.
More importantly though how bad do things have to get to be banned from a Premier Inn?

Richard1985 · 31/05/2024 10:28

BrassOlive · 31/05/2024 09:55

Whey!! Fun OP has entered the chat 🥳

Show quote history

It didn't last long😂

Rosebel · 31/05/2024 10:16

Can you imagine the response on here if it was a man who yanked OPs hair? No one would be condoning that and it shouldn't be any different because it was a woman.
I'd have told her fuck off. It's not playful banter, it's being weird and rude.

Beeinalily · 31/05/2024 10:10

She deserved a punch up the bracket. But OP, PLEASE start another thread and tell us about the weekend! I'm too old for misbehaving, so I like hearing about others!

ThisQuirkyPeachHare · 31/05/2024 10:07

Sounds like she was jealous of your lovely hair and couldn't believe it wasn't extensions so tried to prove it...
Someone to avoid.

Original poster
thelastgoodbye · 31/05/2024 09:57

Myblindsaredown · 31/05/2024 08:48

lol at these answers. Of course it’s not ok. But it’s really not thread worthy either.

And yet people continue to comment. I’ve never resurrected this thread.

That’s the great thing about an open forum, people can post what they like. They aren’t posting to serve only your interests on what you consider “thread worthy”.

OP posts:
BrassOlive · 31/05/2024 09:55

thelastgoodbye · 31/05/2024 09:47

Yes. I had to walk around with uneven hair all weekend.

Show quote history

Whey!! Fun OP has entered the chat 🥳

TimeZonePlantPot · 31/05/2024 09:52

mrsdineen2 · 28/05/2024 11:54

If she thought you had extensions, was she actually trying to pull them out?

This! Was she hoping to rip some of your hair out in the process?

Original poster
thelastgoodbye · 31/05/2024 09:51

WhenTheMoonShines · 31/05/2024 08:49

I need to know about what kind of extensions you were wearing OP, were they clip in or bonded?

A double row weave at the back, bonds and tapes at the front. A clip in fringe. A cap with a sewn on wig.

OP posts:
LoveHeartsFan · 31/05/2024 09:49

Do we not teach children not to pull hair? Which causes pain? A grown adult pulling hair? And then pulling the hair of someone essentially a stranger to her? An adult not understanding that that’s even more of a no-no?

And all because she wanted to ‘prove’ a point that was incorrect? And if OP had had extensions yanking on them would have spoilt OP’s hair? What would she have done with a wig-wearer, snatched the wig off and exposed someone’s alopecia, say?

Whichever way round, she shouldn’t have done it. And she should have apologised either way. I would have pushed away her hand very firmly with an ‘oh no you don’t’ and said ‘are you 2 or something?’

Original poster
thelastgoodbye · 31/05/2024 09:47

Richard1985 · 31/05/2024 08:04

So she managed to pull them out then?

Show quote history

Yes. I had to walk around with uneven hair all weekend.

OP posts:
tennesseewhiskey1 · 31/05/2024 09:46

God - sometimes Mumsnet is fucking weird 🤣🤣 on what planet is pulling someone’s hair - someone you DONT KNOW ok. Yeah she might have thought she was being funny - but really she made herself look like a fucking tool. Also - what the hell is ‘aggy’ ☠️😩 - is that ‘aggressive’ because surely you can be saying the OP was aggressive?!

Original poster
thelastgoodbye · 31/05/2024 09:46

Shinyandnew1 · 31/05/2024 09:05

What happened for the rest of the weekend?

Show quote history

Too much. 90% of the group got a ban from Premier Inn.

OP posts:
zingally · 31/05/2024 09:39

Yeah, that is really odd, rude behaviour.

Unfortunately, when out with a group, especially when it's a group where not everyone knows each other, there can be some batting to try and quickly establish the social pecking order.
MOST of us are happy enough going with the flow, and seeing where the chips fall. Especially when it's a one-time thing, with people you're not likely to socialise again with for a long time.
But there are people out there who just HAVE to grab themselves the Queen Bee spot. Or at the very least, the spot of Chief Crony, when there's very obviously someone else at the head of the pack, such as a "birthday girl" or "bride to be".

These people will do ANYTHING to get to that position as quickly as possible. Usually they dress it up as a "yeah, I'm wild me!" Or "I'm the crazy one!" Or "I'm what you see is what you get. I say things LIKE IT IS!" And that can also include leaning over on a train to pull at a strangers non-existent hair extensions.

She's a twat, and anyone else watching with sufficient social awareness, will also think "what a twat."

Cathbrownlow · 31/05/2024 09:39

it is not funny or silly behaviour, it was designed to embarrass you and get one up on you, OP.

Notjustabrunette · 31/05/2024 09:23

This is odd behavior. The fact that it has never happy to you before, proves this is odd behavior. Why did she do it? Without knowing her, no idea. I would put it down to some people just don’t know how to behave. These oddballs pop up in society every now and then.

Cuppachuchu · 31/05/2024 09:06

I'd have slapped her hand away and shown her up. Weirdo.

Shinyandnew1 · 31/05/2024 09:05

thelastgoodbye · 28/05/2024 15:41

Thanks, she let go quick when she realised it was my real hair and I told her this is my real hair and I don’t have any extensions in. Then everyone laughed uncomfortably.

Honestly the rest of the weekend deserves it’s own thread tbh.

Show quote history

What happened for the rest of the weekend?

fliptopbin · 31/05/2024 09:02

She made a tit of herself, plain and simple.

ImCamembertTheBigCheese · 31/05/2024 08:59

If she'd pulled on my hair she would have got a major telling off in no uncertain terms. Pulling hair is a form of bullying.

Swipe left for the next trending thread