My ex is a d**k!!

You sound insane. You're not putting your child first. It's unhealthy to want to keep her to yourself all the time. She's her own person, she has two parents who love her & want to spend time with her and you're preventing it for no good reason. If he is a decent parent he may well be awarded 50/50 custody. I cannot believe you think it's normal that a father can't see his daughter at the weekend. Ever. That is so bizarre I think you must be joking.

Is is co - incidence tonight I read a threat do people really withhold contact because they are bitter then this .

To be clear he left you. . That might have hurt . But a good solid relationship with her dad is the building blocks of her having a healthy relationship with her future partner .

My Ds couldn’t see his dad because he was unsafe … sadly I do think not having a father figure has damaged him … and yes Disney dad or not child has a right to a relationship with him .

I think I'm beginning to understand why he left! What you fail to understand is he left YOU, not his child. He wants to spend time with his child, not you.

Just because you gave birth to her, it doesn't entitle you to have her 100% of the time. Your ex is her other parent and he is entitled to spend time with his daughter too. Your child has a right to know and spend time with her father - her other parent. You may not like it, and I can see a lot of mums wouldn't like being without their children for any time, but he has rights too as her dad. You need to give your head a bit of a wobble as you're sounding extremely unreasonable.

Unfortunately I think you're in for a nasty shock if he takes this to court. Firstly, yes you will have to pay for your own solicitors fees. Secondly, if you display this kind of attitude in court they would very quickly shut you down. Of course he should be 'allowed' every other weekend, that's the minimum the court would expect these days tbh. 50/50 is not uncommon at all. I ended up having to agree to it, of course I hate it and feel like she should be with me more but ultimately she has a right to both of her parents.

Yes dhs ex is like this it's baffling.
I Co parented with my ex and 0 issues.

Dh ex however is a different story.
He had to take her to court as she was usingdc as weapon. What he asked for was less than what he got. He's originally asked for less as wanted to slowly get his dc used to staying and wanted it staggered over time . His ex sat there saying ' you're not having dc x amount of nights, No way' . The judge replied you're right Miss ( name) I'm granting more. And upped it 50%
10 years on she's still a piece of work but we ignore it now. She stormed out.
She tried to have the CAO changed twice but failed. Was then told if she wasted more time , residency would be to DH.

How about taking advice from people who know what they're talking about re the likely outcome if it goes to court?

Are you on something. Your child has two parents not just you. Stop being selfish.

You're so extreme that it raises doubts for me, but if you're for real, your attitude is shocking and far from normal. You aren't being fair to your DD and it will come back to bite you.

It was 10 years ago! Move on!

You sound a bit unhinged.

We do 50:50. It’s fairest for everyone. Children get to see us both the same and have bedrooms in each home. It can be done in a really beneficial way to the children.

I can’t believe how you cannot see this from his point of view. He is just as much an important parent as you are. ‘Us mums’ do not need to stick together when this is your view 🙄

Is he not her biological father?

Hmm, he's not a Disney dad is he. He's someone who has jumped for ten years. Be careful OP. This is a scenario you would be better to share than fight.

Sorry but she's his daughter too. It took 2 people for your daughter to be here

And I think it's this type of post that should enlighten people about what really happens out there. MOTHERS do behave like this.

It's a rare occurrence that one posts on their unreasonable behaviour but it's extremely common.

On MN we see, more often the other side, the poor women left with feckless fathers who could not care less.

Here, we see a guy who for ten years has accepted "what you have LET him". Proved himself over and over and that's still not good enough.

You really need to calm down.

He is just as much her parent as you are.

Don't even think about poisoning him against her. It will come back to haunt you.

I wish my ex wanted 50/50! That would have been my preference

You make your DD sound like a support human. It's not about your rights. It's about your obligations. You both have obligations towards your daughter. You both have exactly the same rights & obligations.

But she don't even want to allow weekend's!

Ok. So making the assumption that given contact has been operating, there are no other issues...

here's a standard contested contact arrangement.

50.50.

Here's another standard contested contact arrangement

Each alternate weekend, one night during the week, half the school holidays.

This isn't about you. I thought 50/50 was supposed to be best for the child. My parents took full legal custody of a grandchild at 12 years old. The court did indeed take his preference into account.