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AIBU?

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Why don't people reply to party invitations?

62 replies

Hotttchoc · 27/05/2024 11:14

Why don't people RSVP even if you specifically say let me know by XX or RSVP by XX?

It's more awkward if you don't give a date but surely people realise you need to know a couple of weeks before (especially if invitation was sent 6-8 weeks before)

Most people seem to be considerate and respond in a timely manner then you have the odd few which makes it hard to plan fully.

OP posts:
Jeannne92 · 27/05/2024 12:43

If I don’t reply, it means I don't want to come. I know this is U. I have caught this from DH who never wants to go anywhere but is too shy to say so therefore just doesn't reply, I appreciate that this is also U.

For the DCs e.g. a party invitation I do reply straightaway as I don't want them to be jeopardised by my rudeness.

I prefer to reply in person if possible so if I know I'm going to see the inviter within a few days (for something non-urgent), I will tell them then.

I hate WhatsApp groups and do not post on them unless, again, something urgent and I have something genuinely important to say to the whole group. I also hate being added to a WhatsApp group with strangers who then have number so it's U but I would be less speedy to reply had the invitation come by that means.

So all in all a long winded way of saying that no reply probably means not coming.

caringcarer · 27/05/2024 12:33

Laziness.

Greenmayleaves · 27/05/2024 12:32

Based on PP, Do people send birthday party invitations for school age kids weeks in advance? Someone has said 3, someone has said 6-8 weeks.

qwertyqwertyqwertyqwerty · 27/05/2024 12:29

Octavia64 · 27/05/2024 12:20

Because they're working and have multiple kids and also elderly parents and haven't got time to even pee on their own and rsvp ing to a kids party isn't high on the priority list.

After a while I did them at village halls or at home and invited shedloads of people.

I think this too.

Peaceandquiet9276 · 27/05/2024 12:28

I don’t know but as soon as I’m given a party invite for the kids, I check my phone calendar there and then and reply straight away.

PuttingDownRoots · 27/05/2024 12:27

Mine are older now so out of the school birthday party stage...

But part of the issue is people sending invitations 6-8 weeks before. At that length of time we don't know work shifts, family commitments etc. Then they get lost.

Send them 3 weeks before at most!

Octavia64 · 27/05/2024 12:20

Because they're working and have multiple kids and also elderly parents and haven't got time to even pee on their own and rsvp ing to a kids party isn't high on the priority list.

After a while I did them at village halls or at home and invited shedloads of people.

Serencwtch · 27/05/2024 12:17

I teach horse riding & use RSVP as a way to remember the markers in a dressage arena. Unfortunately that no longer works as most people have never heard of it & no clue what it means.

Maybe you need to explain ' please reply by Xth May letting me know if you are able to attend as I need to know numbers. If you don't confirm I will assume you are unable to attend'

Hugosmaid · 27/05/2024 11:35

Maybe they have silenced the class watsap group because they are fed up with being bombarded with messages about lost cardigans/costs/teacher leaving presents/class nights out ..

Maybe they have just forgot to reply 👀 because they are so overwhelmed with life and even though the party sounds amazing - they just forgot

FrogandTrumpet · 27/05/2024 11:21

Because a large number of people are inconsiderate, self-absorbed, want to keep their options open rather than committing to things, and are all round a bit shit.

You’ll get people saying that people are busy, etc. It takes literally 30 seconds, if that, to RSVP by text.

If you genuinely can’t commit but might be able to make it, it takes the same amount of time to say that to the host via text. Time isn’t an excuse or an explanation.

Pipecleanerrevival · 27/05/2024 11:21

People are assholes

FknOmniShambles · 27/05/2024 11:19

Tell me about it. I'm waiting for so many RSVPs for me wedding - making me feel a bit sad although I know that's just me being precious.