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Bf doesn't understand grief

108 replies

Starlive23 · 27/05/2024 08:25

I haven't posted in such a long time but i need some perspective.
My bf and i have been together just under 18m. Do not live together but see each other 3/4 times p/w.
Recently my stepfather of 24y passed away from quite a short but intense illness. Obviously everyone is devestated.
My bf unfortunately hasn't been as understanding as i had hoped, more or less treating it as though life would be normal.
He's a weed smoker so very often falls asleep at random times and won't text me til the next day. The week my sf died, he had basically fallen asleep almost every night, tried to call him, just for a chat i suppose to help process it all. But he wasn't answering.
Fast forward to the day of the funeral/wake and i started to feel angry about him always being asleep. Said I didn't want to but i think possibly this is a deal breaker and maybe we would be better off split. Argument ensues and he starts to say he isn't coming to the wake and not to contact him for 3 days as he needs space. Well that really hurt. I respected his wishes but felt thoroughly dreadful. Now he expects us to go back to normal. Am i overreacting?...sorry its so long, there is so much more but feel I've already written a novel here!

OP posts:
Enko · 27/05/2024 08:30

OrderOfTheKookaburra · 27/05/2024 08:27

You are underreacting. He is a complete waste of space who values getting stoned more than he values you.

Toss this one back, he's a poor specimen.

This

BouleDeSuif · 27/05/2024 08:30

Imagine living with that for years and years.

Couldyounot · 27/05/2024 08:30

Bin him, OP. And condolences on your loss 😔

Ace56 · 27/05/2024 08:30

Sorry for your loss.

Even without the grief situation he sounds like a complete waste of time. Getting high and sleeping all the time? Is he 18?

Catsmere · 27/05/2024 08:29

What @OrderOfTheKookaburra said. Useless bloody stoner who doesn't give a damn about you. You've kept him too long already, bin him now.

Starlive23 · 27/05/2024 08:29

You have no idea how much i needed to hear that

OP posts:
Gettingannoyednow · 27/05/2024 08:29

Dump him, for God's sake. Be free of his useless self-important twattiness.

OrderOfTheKookaburra · 27/05/2024 08:27

You are underreacting. He is a complete waste of space who values getting stoned more than he values you.

Toss this one back, he's a poor specimen.