To be suprised at Butlins and their lack of neurodiverse awareness?

I need you to think really hard about what you have written and why it’s ableist, cruel and discriminatory.

Butlins is quite disabled friendly, if you ring them up before hand they will sort out any issues, they do have the sky park which is sensory, they also have the fast track passes, disability friendly accommodation with parking, I can't think of anywhere on site that you need a ramp except for Reds.

That's why i stick to quieter and smaller holiday parks so it's not so busy and my asd child isn't as overwhelmed by it all.

This reminds me of a Facebook post during lockdown, where a mum was complaining about the local market being full of people, so they couldn't social distance.
But she chose to go to the market, and you chose, OP, like thousands of others, to go to Butlins during half term. You cannot complain that you didn't have the place to yourselves.
Arrogant people expect the world to accommodate them.

If she likes being outdoors and gets DLA then look into a national trust membership. You just pay for the child and then you get a carers card for up to two people to accompany. It works out at about £20 for the year if I remember rightly!

The world is built for the highest functioning people unfortunately. I have a ND nephew and we carefully research family holidays, I find the smaller fry and independent places are more ND friendly then the big names

If you are ever near Preston take her to The Space Centre. You'll need to book in advance, huge, lovely and quiet sensory rooms with soft play elements. Especially for disabled children. It's really really good.

It costs an absolute fortune but I highly recommend center parks as an ASD friendly holiday. They didn't have specific activities for autistic kids that I can recall, but we found it generally a nice relaxed holiday. Loads of space to run about in the woods, fantastic play parks and pools, nice lodges. Lots of different activities if you want them. We went during term time so it was cheaper.

You can get a wristband to enable you to 'queue jump' at pools and fairground on presentation of proof of need. Unfortunately they don't publicise this very well so not everyone is aware of it

Really sorry for your experience OP and I’m sorry you weren’t able to have the break you envisaged with your DGD.

Re the soft play though - the rules re size are to protect the younger children, not exclude ND children. Have seen a small child suffer a broken collarbone from an older child who wasn’t aware of their size at soft play.

The Thomas Centre is especially set up for holidays for non neurotypical children. My own children loved Bluestone in Wales, much calmer there!

It’s not ‘entitled nonsense’ to wish for a more disabled-friendly experience.

I have a son with complex needs and although he has an undersensitive profile and doesn't necessarily get overwhelmed (he presents as non verbal with severe learning disabilities) I would find Butlins too stressful to navigate with him, although chances are he'd quite like it!

There are lots of small holiday camps that are probably more catered to your GD needs. There probably won't be entertainment, but it's quieter in general and have basic amenities.

We tend to rent a cottage at resorts that might have a small pool, restaurant and outside space/small park, with not more than 30 units. You'll be surprised at how those places would adapt for you GD too.

It's a learning curve for you and the more you take your grand daughter away the more you will get used on how to manage her and where to go and where not to go and when to go.

When you are looking at things like Butlins or theme parks most of them have fast passes which are handy for people that have disabilities Butlins included that way you are not hanging around to long.

If your going to busy places go at quieter times although I do have to say you were lucky to get your grand daughter in the circus considering she couldn't access the entertainment, I could not get my children near the circus because of how loud it was.

Don't stop taking her places this is a trap that many people fall into and it can.make situations worst in the long run, the more you can get her used to going places even if she does have meltdowns will actually help in the long run.

Well done on giving her mum and dad a break.

Yes def time it - DD was fine weekday summer and also end of November but we once went too close to Christmas and it was too much.

Sure!

Using York as an example, there is an incredible indoor / outdoor soft play farm called Web Adventure that was spacious and not packed and loads of different areas.
York castle museum is brilliant - really child friendly, and they’ve got a full Victorian street recreation that DD was obsessed with.
railway museum is a must do - you can ride the land train from town to there.
lots of it is pedestrianised so didn’t have to worry too much about her bolting into traffic.
really lovely green spaces for her to run around and explore.
it feels less full on and less pressured - you can always retreat back to your apartment or hotel room for breaks and to chill out before heading out for another walk about.

It depends what she enjoys.

ds is history and train obsessed so we tend to plan short breaks around that. So a night in York so we can do the York Railway Museum type thing.

he was desperate to go to the Tower of London last year so I drove to London and we stayed very close. He enjoyed the Tower but the rest of it was a disaster- him and London aren’t compatible!

for us if we want cities it’s smaller ones like York and Chester. He can cope with Liverpool (very local) for a couple of hours for a specific museum.

What sort of things does she like doing on short city breaks? Any recommendations for favourite cities very welcome as I'd like to take ASD DD soon.

We live and learn and you tried - that’s the most important thing.

DD has ASD and loves small city breaks like York.

Don’t beat yourself up. Your granddaughter has a brilliant time and that’s what matters.

You sound like a fantastic grandma your granddaughter is very lucky to have you but honestly don’t beat yourself up about it, you’ve tried something, found it didn’t work, she enjoyed it anyway even though it wasn’t as you imagined

I guess I’m just a bit precious about my DGD - she’s my absolute world and I am guilty of thinking she’s the centre of the universe 😂

😬

Often I get the same. I feel disappointed as we haven’t been able to do what everyone else has done/the main reason for going somewhere or because DS has been obviously overwhelmed a lot of the time and/or has had a meltdown. Even in these cases, however, DS will often say he’s had a great time or ask to go back.