How do you know if you've got an issue with booze

This.

I think for me it’s about how you’d feel if there was none in the house. Do you routinely buy it when you get your groceries?
Some weeks I drink a bit too much and I regret it. But I can decide to give myself a week or two off it - with beer or wine in the fridge - and not touch it.
Or I can open a bottle of red, have a glass or two and end up pouring the rest away a few days later because I haven’t fancied drinking the rest.
Some evenings, I admit, I will drink until I am drunk and it’ll take me a few days to recover.
Could I go three months without it? Probably. But I don’t really want to either.

Too much is when you can't manage without it, engineer ways to make sure you can drink at events, hiding how much you drink ... Overdoing at an occasion, or one weekend isn't the issue, having the reputation as the drunk one is!

I drink, I like drink but I take my car when it's more convenient to drive, don't at home on weekdays, also say no to another drink because i don't feel like another one ... I don't feel I have a problem even if I'm over 14 units some most weeks

I think it’s worth being aware of the link between alcohol and breast cancer for women. This from the WHO re European data. This is not about judgement but medical evidence that some might not know about.

Many people across the WHO European Region will celebrate 8 March, International Women’s Day, by raising a glass of an alcoholic beverage – oblivious to the fact that drinking alcohol is a major risk factor for the most common cancer among women, breast cancer* Low awareness of this link represents a significant barrier to cancer prevention and a challenge to women’s health across Europe.
According to a recent study, only 21% of women across 14 European countries were aware of the connection between alcohol consumption and the risk of developing breast cancer. Awareness was even lower among men – just 10% of the men surveyed knew of this link.
This fact is even more worrying given that the biological mechanisms linking alcohol to cancer are well-established and substantiated by decades of evidence from across the world.

How does alcohol cause breast cancer?The biological mechanisms through which alcohol causes cancer are complex and varied. The most important one involves the metabolism of ethanol into acetaldehyde, a metabolite that causes DNA damage and mutations that potentially result in cancer. In the case of breast cancer, alcohol consumption also affects estrogen levels. Estrogen plays a significant role in the development and progression of many breast cancers, and alcohol’s impact on these hormone levels could partly explain the heightened risk.
Additionally, substances often affect men and women differently due to differences in metabolism and body composition between the sexes. These distinctions underscore the need for gender-specific approaches in public health strategies related to alcohol consumption and reducing cancer risk.

Breast cancer cases in Europe higher than everBreast cancer represents a major health concern for women across the WHO European Region, with more than 600 000 cases in 2022. The role of alcohol as a preventable risk factor for breast cancer is critical. For women in Europe, breast cancer is the primary cancer caused by alcohol, making up 66% of all cases of alcohol-attributable cancers.
Research indicates that even relatively low levels of alcohol consumption can contribute to the risk of developing breast cancer. More than half of all breast cancer cases attributable to alcohol in Europe are not due to heavy drinking, and about one third of new cases every year are due to drinking the equivalent of up to 2 small glasses of wine per day.
Countries of the WHO European Region must protect their populations from alcohol-attributable cancers as the deadline to achieve the global targets for noncommunicable diseases (NCDs) is closing fast.*

https://www.who.int/europe/news/item/07-03-2024-shouldn-t-we-know-this-already--the-link-between-alcohol-and-cancer

You are drinking a lot. 14 units a week and over that is a lot and will impact your body. Boring but true. Could you decide what you think is an ok amount and stick to that? Not drink Mon-fri? Try the good gin alternatives instead?

I've just seen it's quite a few gins. OP, you're probably having 40 units a week...

3 bottles of wine plus gin is well over 30 units so over double the recommended amount. It will be having a detrimental effect on your health. Try to stick to the recommendation of 14 units per week, which is 1 bottle plus a couple of gins.

I think if you're asking the question it could be a problem.

Reframe it as a drug - cocaine, or heroin or weed or whatever. If you were doing those with the same frequency would it be a problem? Why do you think alcohol is different? It's poisonous ethanol albeit nicely flavoured and marketed to get you hooked.

Could you go without alcohol for three months or do you think absolutely not - there's no way you could do that wedding/party/holiday without a drink? Could be a problem.

I think it's a scale and most people who drink alcohol are dependent in some way.

Can't remember which podcast chap said it - but if you can go four days a week without a drink, why not go seven? We know it's detrimental to our mental and physical health. Why bother moderating?

I used to drink a lot - a lot - and it was really really hard to stop at the beginning but it's getting easier.

I do have designated drinking nights that I look forward to because I know it enables me to relax and gives me a nice feeling. This is problematic - pre-planning, self-medicating to relax.

There's a 7-8pm slot when the kids have just gone to bed that I usually yearn for a drink. As is this - cravings.

I can go without it but life just feels flatter somehow. As is this - a sense of loss at the thought of not drinking.

The UK is a country where these problematic drinking behaviours/feelings/associations are widespread - but the fact they are widespread doesn't alter the fact they are problematic.

If you are asking the question, there may be a problem. DH and I share a bottle of wine on Friday and on Saturday nights, and on Sunday we have a shot each of whiskey. That’s it. No drinking during the week.

I'm approaching it from the other end of the scale and I don't think you have a problem - at least not from what you have posted on here. But I have been in AA for many years and my "normal" both in terms of what I used to drink, and the former drinking habits of many of my recovering friends, makes a couple of bottles of wine over a weekend seem fine. In fact I recall my first sponsor saying that if she'd only drunk a bottle a night, she wouldn't have bothered with AA in the first place.

I recommend this a lot but if you want to stop or cut down, Jason Vale's book is amazing.

I think if you're questioning it, it suggests there is an issue. That's an awful lot of booze in one week.

Stop buying it. Break the habit- instead of sitting down to drink and snack in the evening find something new to do that you’d enjoy.
It’s similar to stopping smoking- cold turkey is the way to go (unless you’ve already reached the stage to have DT then you need to have medically managed withdrawal)

I think it's when you make plans around it or it stops you doing other things.

I don't drink anymore but when I did I used to avoid going to places I had to drive to because I wouldn't be able to have a drink and wouldn't book a Sunday morning yoga class even though it was my favourite teacher for example.

I would suggest looking at the guidelines which I would think are below three bottles and g&TS. You speak of set days, what happens if you don't drink those days, does it impact your mood?

The reality is a lot of people have dysfunctional relationship with alcohol but when queried the peers start with I drink 700 pints and am fine. Or I drank from age ten and am fine.

There is clear verified research detailing the issues linked to alcohol. Look into the information. Explore not drinking for a period of time and note the difference in your life.

The extra biscuits are unlikely to directly impact your liver, increase your risk of certain cancers, etc.

I downloaded a drink tracker app years ago and tracked my intake for a month and to be honest I was horrified by how much I was drinking and how much I was in denial about this fact.

I realised a little while ago I have an issue with alcohol, but it’s since hitting thirty (and embarrassing myself deeply, and losing a couple of mates in the process, at an event last summer) that’s really given me the kick to do something about it. I don’t generally drink much at home, it’s when I’m out that’s the issue. I have no off switch, I cannot recognise when I need to just stop.. so I get wasted and act the fool and, sometimes, people need to look after me/get me home/whatever. I’m far too old to still be acting this way, I should’ve stopped long ago, and I can’t bear to have any more occasions where I ruin it by acting so badly and hating myself afterwards. The first time I got properly drunk I was only 12 or 13, so old habits die hard.. but I’m determined now.

I drank loads from the ages of 14-24ish. Then I just realised it wasn’t worth feeling ill for a day/two days over and also find the way I act even after one or two drinks to be quite cringe-inducing.

So I’m afraid I’m one of the famous Mumsnet “glass of champagne at a wedding” drinkers. Not tee total but 99.9% of the time I’d rather not drink.

…unless a good margarita is on offer ☺️

There are quizzes you can take with various alcohol support services - this one came up for me on Google and seems balanced:

alcoholchange.org.uk/alcohol-facts/interactive-tools/check-your-drinking

I used to drink a daft amount when I was younger. I did not get hangovers back then but these days it takes ages for me to properly get over a big night. I love a glass of wine but do not drink during the week. I also reduced my time with certain people in my social circles who still drink like fish. I just can't stand feeling rubbish, feeling depressed and wasting half my day due to over doing it the night before.

I like a glass of wine in the evenings but we are quite strict on which nights we drink. I find I need something to look forward to after the kids are in bed and sometimes that’s a glass of wine and sometimes it’s a cup of tea and something nice to go with it. I’m not a huge lover of sweets and treats so the pull of an ice cold beer or glass of red with crisps is usually stronger but I find limiting the nights we drink means we enjoy it more - and we rarely drink a full bottle between us. Any more and I’d be ill!

I haven’t had an alcoholic drink in 6 years because I’m an alcoholic and was on a slippery slope to ruining my life. However for most of my drinking life I had a lot of fun with alcohol.

Giving up is hard to begin with but the longer you go without the less you miss it I have found and now I rarely think of it at all. I don’t find my life flat at all, I still have a lot of fun during meals and on nights out with friends but it’s great to be able to drive and to know you’ll wake up feeling good the next morning.

I think if you’re asking the question or putting rules in place about your drinking (only at weekends/never at home) then you probably have an issue with alcohol. People who drink normally don’t need to do this, I never needed this when I was drinking normally in my twenties and that was when my relationship was not problematic.