Not to have given up my seat on plane

I’ve not been on holiday since before having kids and we never felt the need to book seats, it was never an issue. We’ve finally booked our first family holiday and OH refuses to pay for seats. I’ve seen so many stories like this and as the lead Passenger, I’ve bloody booked them, I need peace of mind that my 7 and 2 year old will be sat with us.

We booked a long haul flight once and booked the front row of the back section because we had a skycot for our baby. Middle row of 4 with a similar couple booked on the other side. We both had to wait to drop our buggies and by the time we got there there was a family of 4, 2 adults and kids about 8 or 9, sitting in our seats. They had already unwrapped all the blankets, taken their shoes off, unwrapped the headphones, put the pillows on the floor with their feet up on them. We were gob smacked. When we told them to move they started begging us to let them stay, needed to be together as a family, we have children look, my wife is a nervous flyer etc. Lterally begging with hands together. We couldn't shift them. Other bloke with the baby and DH were starting to shout as they just wouldn't budge. Cabin crew came and forced them out. Even then, the wife a few rows back with one kid kept standing up and leaning towards us begging for our seats. They were astounded we just hadn't let them have the seats as they were a family of 4.

I sit in the seat I paid for unless cabin crew tell me otherwise and then they better have an upgrade seat waiting for me.

YWNBU but, it shouldn’t be ‘allowed’ for passengers with same booking reference to book seats leaving one in the middle.

We (DH and I) always book the window and aisle seats, he prefers the window while i am claustrophobic and cannot sit in the middle seat where I can't get out.
We have never had an empty middle seat between us and do not expect this at all.
And people seated between us have been visibly surprised when we exit the plane together as they had no idea we're a couple.
DH spends his time looking out of the window or at the flight tracker while I am concentrating on keeping the plane up in the air.

Yes, we’ve done this a couple of times but if the flight isn’t too busy, then there is a chance we get the empty middle seat which is a bonus. Maybe sounds a bit selfish but I think it’s exceedingly selfish not to book a seat and expect someone else to move.

I am honestly shocked that even one person thinks you're being unreasonable, you specifically paid for a specific seat so why the heck should you give it up for someone who was too cheap to do the same thing. Well done you, for standing your ground!! 👏👏👏👏

I remembered once I was flying with my husband and our lap infant and I booked us same. (I did hope nobody will book that middle seat so we would be able to put our 1 year old down, but plane was packed and seat was taken). The guy did ask us if we wanted to sit together, but my husband wanted a window(and he's tall, sitting in the middle doesn't suit him) and I fly aisle for ages and always pay for it as don't want to be squashed in the middle. It was 2hrs flight though and the guy in the middle was very patient when we joggle our baby from one to another.

Now that is unreasonable. That man in the middle was more tolerant than I would have been. Passing your baby across when neither of you had the grace to swap with the hapless passenger in between you.

I wouldn’t give up an aisle seat if paid for. I’ve got problems with my back and sciatica and need the aisle to stretch into and get up and move.

I also agree that it’s a bit odd reserving seats with one between to travel with your friend. I’m guessing you were hoping no one would choose to sit between you on a less full flight??

Honestly!!! I'd be embarrassed to ask someone such a thing! Wth should you swap, she should have booked an aisle seat simple as!

You didn’t want to be squashed in the middle but you thought it was ok for that bloke to have to put up with you & your husband passing your baby back and forth????

It would have served you right if he’d objected every single time any of you got in his way.

Phew!! According to the AIBU poll only 4% of mumsnetters are entitled.

Of course you weren’t being unreasonable!!!

#1 she/they could/should have paid the extra to prebook seats to sit together. I’m assuming the family she wanted to sit with were adults or older children (havent read all comments) because BA has a clear policy:

We want to make travelling as a family as enjoyable and stress-free as possible. To ensure your family has the best seats when you fly, we recommend choosing yours in advance when you book. There may be an additional fee for this.
If you don’t choose your seats in advance, we always do our best to seat your family together based on flight seat availability. This may mean that you’ll be seated in adjacent rows or across the aisle. All children under 12 will be seated with an accompanying adult. It's recommended that children under 12 in Club Suite are supervised and not left unattended during the flight. Anyone over 12 may be seated separately.”

#2 she could/should have asked crew at gate desk.

#3 she could/should have asked flight attendants when she bored as a last resort. They know all the tricks to resolve these matters including knowing on the flight roster who is an employee, plain clothes marshall, someone on standby…. Or even who they would be willing to upgrade to move passengers around.

To the 4% who think OP was unreasonable — you don’t get to dictate where people sit for your convenience. Any non selfish, non entitled person who wanted to switch seats that badly would have offered to pay OP the cost she paid OR tried to make an arrangement somehow as a last resort.

You don’t get to make up rules or make others uncomfortable to suit your preferences.

Yeah, it was an Emirati woman traveling with her family. She wanted me to sit in the middle so she didn't have to sit by a man. I asked her son who was traveling with her to switch then and he said no "I must sit next to my wife". Entitled twats, truly.

If it’s permitted, this is exactly what my husband and I do. Sometimes it’s not so we suck it up but I hate the middle and window and am willing to pay to have the seat I want. I do not talk with my husband over the middle person.
When you book your flights, book your seats - simple!

If you don’t talk, have you thought of booking separate rows? The only people who would actually want a middle seat are those who want to sit next to their travelling companion, and, by doing this you would leave that option for one more couple.

Quite! 2 friends watching Netflix sounds bliss by comparison!

My husband and I always do this if we can. I hate the middle and window - I’m tall and my husband hates the aisle. We don’t talk with each other during flights so if someone has to sit between us, they won’t be disturbed by us. And if they didn’t want a middle seat, they should have paid to have their preferred seat - like we do.

@Deepf60 This happened to me - leg injury abroad and flying back with being given three seats.

I was told by the insurance company that it is a "legal" requirement (not the 'law' as in statute but required by insurance and airline as a lawful condition of flight) if you have a full leg injury to have three seats because you can't have anyone else in the row for their safety and yours in the event of an emergency, you might block them in (if you are closer to the aisle and can't walk unaided) or they might block access to your assistance and because you need to elevate your leg due to risk of thrombosis if you can't walk around.

At the time I thought it was all a bit excessive but having read about that air turbulance stuff recently and people without seat belts flying up and hitting their head on the ceiling, I can now see how it's realistically possible for a healthy and mobile person on the end to be injured /killed/knocked out seriously obstructing or preventing access to help for a person with a full length leg injury.

YANBU at all. And especially for short(ish) flights (not intercontinental en limited in flight hours) adults should be capable of sitting alone, like maybe 1.2 meters away from their friends/family, quietly minding their own businesses and not making a nuisance of themselves.

Wow, that poor guy must have had the patience of a saint. Did you really think it was OK to refuse to swap seats and then pass a baby back and forth over the top of him!?

I get your point. But her friend wanted a window one, she wanted an aisle. I remembered once I was flying with my husband and our lap infant and I booked us same. (I did hope nobody will book that middle seat so we would be able to put our 1 year old down, but plane was packed and seat was taken). The guy did ask us if we wanted to sit together, but my husband wanted a window(and he's tall, sitting in the middle doesn't suit him) and I fly aisle for ages and always pay for it as don't want to be squashed in the middle. It was 2hrs flight though and the guy in the middle was very patient when we joggle our baby from one to another. But unfortunately, I am not comfortable in the middle or even window seat. I will never swap, unless like for like- different row, same seat.

Curious how the other passenger knew they were travelling together if they really were just watching netflix

Where does it say in OP that the other passengers knew they were friends?

Always book an aisle seat and refuse to move if asked. I didchange once for someone who was sat on the front row (plenty of leg room) but that's because it was nearer the toilet (why I book an aisle seat near the front). Some of the flights I've been on cost lest than £30 & still people don't want to add an extra few £sss to sit together and get aggressive/rude/upset if they can't sit next to friend/partner/child/relative etc. If I was cabin crew and folks whingedabout their random allocated seat and wanted to move I would let them but be charging twice what it would have cost when booking. It would stop all this entitled crap.🙄

Not being unreasonable! It’s not just the paying its the thinking it through and planning in advance that you bothered to do to make sure you were comfortable and she didn’t bother but then expects to be accommodated. We are already booked for Christmas holidays booked front row of economy aisle because that’s what I have found is most comfortable for me. When I’ve gone to the bother to pay and plan this much in advance I don’t see why someone who didn’t bother should take my seat!

Ironically I was supposed to be in a window seat, but the cabin crew made me move because two orthodox Jewish men objected to sitting next to me...

What you and your DH do is perfectly reasonable, and you leave 2 seats each side potentially for couples who wish to sit next to each other. Not sure any airline shows the sex of passengers already booked, so we can avoid sitting next to a man!