Would you dry and fold your hosts' laundry?

I just don’t know where people’s minds go…is this really your first thought in relation to laundry?

Who said he didn't

I just don’t get why people are so wound up about this- it’s just clean clothes!

We visit and stay with family, and they us, and any washing needing done gets chucked in the machine, and whoever’s about when it’s done, deals with it-hanging it up/putting in dryer. This means I’ve regularly handled my adult cousin’s boxers, and he’ll have had his hands on my pants…they’re just clothes!

It would freak me out a bit tbh but I'm sure he did it to be helpful and considerate so I wouldn't make a big deal out of it

Oh yes, I agree. (The reason they just washed underwear is because that's all that was in the basket, but that was because it needed hand washing and I hadn't got around to it.)

Decent and considerate of him.

What else should he have done: leave it damp in a basket? That would have been up for criticism too

@karottybagel surely he'd have nicked a pair to wank with?

What's the point with a fondle?

I think it's nice of him 😊 my brother in law did this when we went to stay with him in Florida - with five kids, myself and DH I was very grateful!

No, touching peoples clothes is a bit much. Washing up is fine.

I wouldn’t see this as overstepping unless you’d already asked him not to do it. It seems like it comes from a kind and helpful place, not pushy or manipulative.

It’s fine to ask him not to do it, though personally I think you’d be a fool to turn down the help! But I would phrase it as being due to your laundry being finicky and not that you think him seeing/touching your underwear while doing the laundry is somehow indecent.

(If you really do think he might be perving on your undies I would ask him to leave altogether, not just leave your laundry alone.)

He probably needed to do some washing, found your stuff in the machine and thought “if I leave this in a damp pile in the warm weather it will start to smell and I’ll be in the wrong so I better dry it”.

It was kind of him.

You think he contrived the whole situation?

Really?

He obviously felt he couldn't leave it in a wet mess in a basket, that would have caused extra creasing so put it into the dryer then couldn't leave warm dry clothes in there either as they would also be super creased.
I'd much rather come home to a dry folded pile than a wet basketful

I think he was being very kind.

I'm such an overthinker that I'd probably be wondering if he'd see the wash and dry it so I wouldn't have put it on in the first place if I was worried.

I think he did a nice thing and might have been worried about just dumping it in a basket.

But in life everything is context. If you get on well and he's pleasant then no problem. If he has previously given you creepy vibes then might be a concern. You've not mentioned any issues so I'm going for he's a good sort!

Was raining when he changed the washer over but had cleared by the time his wash finished?

No room on the line?
Not enough room in the dryer for his?
Prefers the smell of air dried laundry?
Doesn't like or is allergic to the smell of dryer sheets or whatever she uses to limit wrinkles?
Arthritis limiting the amount of movement in putting wet clothes on the line before he started to feel sore?
Feeling a bit funny about too much handling of other people's laundry?
Couldn't carry a big, heavg basket of wet washing to the line, or more than one basket, so opted to line dry just his and bung the rest quickly into the dryer?

The only bit that would bother me would be putting things in the dryer that should be air dried.

It's likely he thought wet washing left in a basket for you to deal with would end up getting smelly.

Oh this is giving me painful flashbacks to when DP’s mum used to look after DD at ours and she would go through our laundry baskets and wash knickers and put them all over our radiators to dry. We told her not to and she stopped doing it, but then would forget we’d told her this and would start doing it again.

i ended up hiding the laundry baskets in a locked wardrobe.

I think it’s slightly icky your BIL doing this. Did he really need to do his laundry just at that particular time. I’m sure he could have waited till machine was free.

I think it was meant to be helpful.

I guess he wanted to do his own washing and thought he'd be helpful and dry yours rather than just leave it wet in the basket.

I'd cringe at him folding my keks and bras but no more than I used to cringe when my MIL would do stuff like that - she meant no harm but I used to hide the washing basket when she came over!

I work in a small learning disability care home, if doing a 24 hour shift (includes the sleep in) it's normal for other staff/clients to do your laundry! We were a uniform during the day and our own nightmare but we all chuck it in and however is going to do the next load folds it. We are all people and we all wear pants.

I thought it was a bit weird to start with but no I think it's totally normal and I appreciate not going home with dirty nightwear.

Then surely he'd have just had a rummage, found ops skimpiest pair, and his them in his room for a fancy wank 🙄

Just say thank you and be glad it’s a job done for you. So it was underwear if you put his washing through for him presumably you would be horrified it included pants and socks? Too precious by half

Or your bum is huge and they cover it all