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AIBU?

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Original poster

To say no to this holiday

30 replies

Rosebel · 25/05/2024 07:32

We have been invited to go on holiday with in laws during October half term. This would be our only holiday as we can't afford a summer holidays and this would be split 3 ways and will be fairly cheap as we'd be renting a house near the beach from a friend of SIL.
I love going on holiday but I don't want to go to this one. DS is autistic (low functioning) and starting school in September. We have very high doubts he will cope at school and he certainly will not cope with a holiday straight after. He hates routine change, new places are will not sleep.
I have suggested to DH that one of us takes the older kids away with his family and the other one stay home with DS. He's not keen and wants all of us to go.
I (stupidly) mentioned my concerns to MIL who told me not to worry because DS might be less autistic by then. This just confirms my thoughts that the holiday will be a disaster.
AIBU to tell them we're not going?
.

OP posts:
Sirzy · 25/05/2024 07:48

I think planning for that school holiday to be a chance to rebalance is the best.

he may be fine but you can’t be sure

SilentSilhouette · 25/05/2024 07:46

Or you could use it as something for your son to look forward to, especially if he finds school tough?

My DS is autistic but as long as its been clearly explained (where we are going, why etc...) to him he would see it as a good thing.

Mindymomo · 25/05/2024 07:46

I would just see how it goes with starting school, before finally deciding. Your in laws will just have to accept that although a holiday would be lovely, it’s just not worth the upheaval it will cause.

MartinsSpareCalculator · 25/05/2024 07:42

I absolutely wouldn't be going. You know your child and their needs, and if this holiday is likely to not meet those needs then you don't go. Prioritising other people's wants over your kid would be wrong and your husband sounds like a bit of a twat for wanting to do that really.

I've never been on holiday with family and it not be an endurance though.

Froniga · 25/05/2024 07:37

Oh dear, MIL seems to be a little out of touch with the term “Autistic”.
I think you’re absolutely right it could be a disaster. I would stick to my guns and tell DH that I shall stay home with our autistic child and he can go with the rest of the children and his family. This seems an entirely reasonable and sensible arrangement.
Hope things work out.

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