Tell me you're a parent of a ND child without telling me...

This thread.

Wondering whether your highly talkative child really is autistic and then reading through something like this and going yes... yes... oh jesus that's not just her?

The running away like an energizer bunny. Having to go first up or down the stairs. The food. The fucking fucking socks.

The having a second child and realising that things you deemed normal in infancy and toddler hood... weren't.

I am autistic myself and it's still so bloody hard. Because I feel like all I know how to teach her is how to mask. And she triggers me every day because she shines a light on my weakness, my mismatches with society and I'm so afraid of her having the same or worse struggles.

She has has exactly the same coat for 8 years now thank god for vinted. I have just purchased the largest size they ever produced and I am dreading when she grows out of it.

My house is full of stuff. I put it away and try and get rid of it around a year later. Last month she asked for her roller skates. I found them in a box we hadn't unpacked when we moved - in August 2020. She remembers everything!

I don't have an evening. Getting her to bed takes around 3 hours. It has always been like this from babyhood. Sleep is for the weak. 50% of the time she will end up in my bed anyway.

No, teacher she does not have a close knit group of friends. She feels like an outsider and doesn't understand why no-one gets her. I realise you "can't imagine her ever having a tantrum", that's because she is so exhausted from masking at school, it all comes out in the evenings.

Sainsburys have stopped selling her breakfast drink. I don't know why as, according to my sainsburys statistics, I was the 6th biggest purchaser of this drink in the entire North West last year who the fuck the other 5 were I don't know. My stash will run out at the end of next week, so I am going to have to source it from every other supermarket I the area.

She is the most adorable, funny and quickly little being I know and I am so lucky to have her.

I find we're tightening up our childproofing as our son gets older, rather than relaxing it.

My DD’s on ADHD meds. (She’s Audhd)

Coffee sends her crazy. Even before the meds.

Another one from me:

Having a 2 drawer airfryer so theres no chance of DCs food touching the food they don't like.

Mine is a teen now and talks the hind legs off his barber.

But it took years to find one who gets it.

The barber I take him to is so amazing he rang me before an appointment one day to say he had to change the location of his chair in the shop from his normal spot and wanted to check that DS would cope.

What an incredible thing to do. Some people are so kind and aware.

Yes, I don't object to ds1 having coke or coffee the caffeine calms him down.

And yes if ds2 wants to spend the day under a blanket, so what.

I still don't get why adhd treatment is amphetamine based but hey ho!

I can’t tell you whether we can come to [important family event] until the last minute.
but once I’ve said we r coming, absolutely no minute detail of the day’s plans can change

I can summarise the travel plans and time out of the home in the ?5 seconds person who needs the information has, before they become so overwhelmed they get annoyed at me

I cry sometimes at seeing younger sibling sail past social milestones older hasn’t achieved.

I can find joy in the small connections

Ds has refused to wear shorts since age 4. I randomly bought him a pair from a charity shop. Has not taken them off for 6 days now. With winter coat & heavy army boots. Nearly 20.

Having to buy multiple different flavour/brand 6+ toothpastes to try him with after he turned 6. I knew the fruit flavour would be best for him, but he said it 'burned/hurt' his mouth, so I had to prove that other versions, all mint flavour would be worse, I was right but still had to ease him in to the new 6+ fruit flavour toothpaste with teeny amounts until he got used to it because we couldn't go back to the 0-5 fruit flavoured toothpaste as he needs the higher fluoride content now. Where we live has very few child toothpaste options. I kind of get it, I hate changing toothpaste brands myself as it always tastes disgusting for the first week until you get used to it. I suspect he will be using fruit flavour for a long time.

Having to plate his food so it isn't touching too much on the plate, if crumbs from 1 food get on another food having to wipe or rinse it off.

He won't eat wet (e.g. sour or pasta with sauce) or blended food (except pizza or jam sandwiches/bread and butter), he won't eat potato products as he doesn't like mash (even the 'mash' inside of fries except for McDonalds of course, I have just found a super crispy skinny fries frozen product which he will eat!!). Will only eat the skin of a jacket potato. Eats very little protein, barely any cheese, very little/few types of meat (I wish he would eat chicken nuggets, he doesn't even eat McDonalds nuggets).

Will stop wearing socks when they start to get threadbare because he's worried it will turn in to a hole soon.

Hates getting his hair cut so gave him the choice to grow it out, but now have to be super careful brushing it because he will scream and cry if I pull a knot too hard.

Worry how he is perceived in winter when the wind is strong and cold where we live, he hates it and absolutely screams like a banshee... worry he will scare other children away.

He was supposed to go to his second ever birthday party today (he's almost 7 so judging from other posters not doing too bad with this) but he has a stupid f'ing stomach bug so couldn't go and I'm worried about it affecting his friendships and whether it will turn out to have been his last ever birthday invite/whether he will be invited to another any time soon.

Mine had a 17 tog duvet and 2 blankets.

After one hot night where she sweated all night and didn’t sleep she removed one blanket.

Child has just gone to bed under a weighted blanket and two duvets and tried to demand an ice pack to go with them.

Mine won’t wear a bloody coat!

Going from winter coat to lightweight coat. 😬 Could be boiling outside but the winter coat is very much wanted.

This has been one of the best threads I've ever read and makes you feel like your not the only one. Thanks OP and all who wrote in.

Just want to tell you all you are fantastic parents, and thank you for the thread which is the most incredible eye opener.

❤

No, she's not lazy, if I put her down or take her out of her special needs pushchair, she'll run and keep running, probably into an on coming vehicle/open water/someones garden or house.
"She stripped off her shoes, socks, trousers and pull up in the playground again, so we'll be keeping her indoors at break time".
"The dining hall is too overwhelming for her, she was climbing on tables and walls, so she needs to go home for lunch." - 3 years ago...
Everything gets launched across the room once she's done with it.
Did we go anywhere nice during the holidays? No.
We rarely take photos of her because she rarely has clothes on!
We have to immediately stop what we're doing when the washing machine starts it's spin cycle. I must sit and hold her dog soft toy whilst she swings on her doorway swing. The same goes for when certain Cocomelon songs come on.
Locks on multiple doors, cupboards and windows, keys hidden.
I know it's -5/torrential rain and she has several coats, but she feels a short sleeve tshirt is sufficient!
Bing and Cocomelon on repeat during waking hours, even when she's not in the room.
I'd she coming in for a hug or a headbutt?
Sorry, went off on a tangent there...

It's acceptable. Just in case you needed it heard from somewhere.

I'd also add:

If YOU find this in any way upsetting, please bring it up with YOUR therapist.

@Comingoutofmycage51 heinz spaghetti with sausages 😫. They are a staple for DS and I dont know how he will cope with the new recipe. I'm also pissed off because they've added gluten to the beans version with the change and although I don't eat them, I am GF and support the GF community on this issue. Bombard Heinz even more with disgruntled messages!

Having to do 'silent' sneezes so I don't upset dd and going around the house reopening blinds that dd has closed because she doesn't like bright light.

And we still laugh at the first time as a teenager he went out with friends and their parents for dinner and I explained that he had to offer to pay for his at which point the parents would probably tell him it was ok that they were paying at which point he had to say it’s ok I can pay for mine for them to say no it’s fine we are paying for him to then say thank you, this is to be fair weird social behaviour and he asked why on earth people go through all that 😂

i remember buying a pair of trainers in every size they had available because he they were the only ones that he said didn’t hurt his feet and I wasn’t risking not being able to get them in future!
He now has a job, a girlfriend, drives, still has special interests although they have changed, needs reminding that washing and brushing your hair are things you need to do and still looks at me with a wtf expressions if I have to explain some expected social rule or explain certain responses and how showing interest in others is important and makes them feel valued.

This is lovely to read ❤

Puft Hula Hoops for one child, Chip Sticks for the other!

I also have a million carrot cake oaty bars which apparently 'taste weird' and now can't be eaten. I'm assuming a change of recipe. Thanks, Organix! 🙄

So sorry, all we want for our dc is for them to be happy and be able to function in society. She clearly has a loving and devoted parent in you and that makes a huge impact. Xx