To ask if you have the same political views as your significant other?

Nope.
Been together since 1997. Our second date was 2nd May. I was celebrating, he was crying into his beer.

Yes. Same views. There is absolutely no way I would ever even date a Tory.

Our views and morals would be so polar opposites, that it would mean we had nothing in common.

Yes. I couldn't have a relationship with someone with strongly opposing views, as its not just a casual preference, its based in a deep rooted sense of right and wrong. And so convinced am I that what I believe carries moral and ethical weight, I genuinely struggle to respect someone who is strongly committed to the opposite position. Its always accompanied by character traits and opinions i dislike. A soft leaning in the other direction from someone who didn't have much interest or hadn't thought it through I could possibly tolerate, as i have friends like this and we avoid the subject.

My DH and I are similar @DoAWheelie , we don’t always agree on policies, I.e., how to achieve a particular outcome, but morally we’re mostly on the same page.

Broadly aligned on outlook, what we consider social justice, societal fairness, both agree on Constitutional matters, want to see an end to the monarchy, and so on.

We disagree on quite a few cultural matters, but I think that's perfectly healthy. I don't think I could ever be comfortable in a relationship with someone with the polar opposite views on the really important stuff. It's a bit of a case of "respect the right to hold those views", but at the same time not believing there's any obligation incumbent upon me to either respect the views themselves, or the person holding them.

Broadly there are two ways you can disagree politically.

Moral grounds, or policy grounds.

E.G "As a society we should help disabled people who can't work"is a moral thing.

"I think Policy A will do y", and "I think policy B will do y", are policy grounds. You both want the same outcome but think differently as to how to achieve it.

My late OH and I had all the same moral positions but had lots of debate over how to achieve those which were often hours long and very fun. I don't need someone who parrots my opinions back at me but I can't be with someone who doesn't agree on the big moral things.

Extreme beliefs are death to any meaningful relationships. They kill off human connection and spoil what might otherwise be a decent human.being.

We have pretty much opposing views but just don't discuss politics.
Been married for over 30-years so it shows that it can work.

Yes, both Labour but he's center, I'm left.

Yes, and I am curious about how relationships work when the parties don't share social and moral values.

Yes, pretty much. Both Labour voters, both slightly to the left of centre. Randomly, despite my left tendency, I’m a little more “right-wing” on law and order. I draw the line at capital punishment, but I think we should take a much, much harsher line, as well as trying to tackle the systemic causes of criminal conduct.

Does everyone in your world have to share your politics?
What if you had a friend you liked very much and then discovered her politics were not like yours?
What if you were comfortable with a friend's politics and then discovered she had some very unpleasant traits?

And that’s exactly why it matters in our house as we discuss it lot.

Yes, but it wouldn’t really matter if we didn’t because we rarely discuss politics.

Yes, we have very similar views, a bit different in details but vote the same.
I have a few friends with different political views but I personally wouldn’t be able to have a partner with different political views.
My parents have different political views and it affected our relationship.

DH and I disagree politically, but I still love him despite some of his views

Broadly, yes.
We have the same overall beliefs about how society should function.
I suspect over the decades we've not necessarily always voted the same though - it's more about believing in different ways to reach the same end, and also, which element of the manifestos are more important to each of us.

Not really. We’ve been married almost 30 years and just don’t discuss it too much.

No. He once voted Tory which gave me the ink for ages.

and we’ve just had a Barney about whether a two state solution is the way forward for Palestine so no.

Very much the same and we talk about it often. Families are also similar to be fair.

My values pretty much align to one particular party.

DH on the other hand is a bit of a head scratcher.... he hates the Tories with a passion "because they've fucked the country"...... yet some of his values aren't exactly left, definitely more to the right. He is adamant he will vote labour but when I've pointed out to him they won't actually do the stuff he wants he gets all huffy. So we don't talk about politics anymore 😂

Not at all! I'm left wing, he's right wing, both very outspoken. It makes for great conversation during long car journeys - we love talking about politics and it's always interesting and rewarding when we discover something we do agree on (more than you'd think). He's opened my eyes to a lot of new perspectives as well.

I'll be honest, it really worried me when we first started dating - I fell firmly into the "I could never date a Tory" camp. However, with time I've realised that DP is kind, principled, and shares my core values - we just have very different ideas on what a fair society looks like.

The main problem has been introducing DP to some of my left wing friends - although I agree with their politics, they can be very snooty and judgmental about anyone who doesn't think the same way. I used to be like this myself, so I get it, but I always start to panic when the conversation veers into politics!

No. We don't discuss politics in detail and have never shared our voting intentions. But I can guess what his vote is, and I'm sure he can guess mine. We live in a very safe inner London seat where our votes make no difference.

My DP and I are very much on the same page politically, yes.

I wouldn’t be attracted to someone with completely opposing political views to mine. My politics are a reflection of the values that are most important to me. If someone had the opposite values, we wouldn’t be compatible on anything but the most superficial level.

I think whether you could live with someone with completely the opposite political views comes down to these things:

1. How much your politics are linked with your values and how strongly you feel those values are representative of what makes someone a fundamentally decent person. If you’re someone who just decides how to vote based on which party you think would benefit you personally the most, or who doesn’t see much of a difference between parties, or who just votes a certain way because you always have without thinking about why, then it’s probably not going to a problem living with someone who votes differently.
2. Whether you’re someone who thinks ‘love-hate’ relationships full of massive arguments are healthy. I actually know someone who is standing for election for one party and whose husband vehemently disagrees with that party on basically everything. He will not be voting for her on 4 July. They have constant blazing rows about political issues, really nasty sometimes. But they’ve been together 20ish years and she seems to think the rows are part of the attraction. They have kids and seem to be happy. For me, that sort of conflict all the time would feel stressful and toxic - but we’re all different.

I should add that I also wouldn’t be attracted to someone who had no interest in/knowledge of politics at all. I’ve got lots of brilliant friends who aren’t interested in politics and that’s absolutely fine, but it’s not something I’d want in a life partner.

Yes, broadly speaking, and I don't think it's a coincidence - for both of us our politics are an extension of basic morality and compassion. I wouldn't chuck him if he voted Lib Dem or anything but if he took a view that was essentially survival of the fittest (which is what modern conservatism has come to) I would struggle to maintain my love and respect for him.