To sell my house and try and get a council house? To think I'm too poor to own?

Talk to your lender and any other institutions you may be in debt to. It’s always better to face them. Your lender may agree to interest only payments for a few months and you can arrange to pay debts in instalments. Your lender may know if other schemes that might help. Get some quotes for repairs so you know what you’re dealing with. See a debt counselling organisation. It’s hard- I was a single parent with 2 kids one SEN but if you seek advice there will be a way out. Councils will class you as intentionally homeless if your house is repossessed or you sell and make yourself homeless

council tax is an absolute priority, sadly if you default they can take it directly from your salary at a ridiculously high percentage, you can look on your local council website under attachment of earnings. It is the same across the country though, set by central government. The argument is why would the council settle for a payment arrangement you could default on when they know they will get a guaranteed amount in through your salary. It might have changed since the cost of living crisis but please even you cannot make the full payment make some payment and ring them. They are honestly there to help you, I used to work in ctax and we would bend over backwards to help people but there are limits as to how far we can stretch it due to government parameters. It is a tax, just collected locally.

Do not do this. Most councils will count this as making yourself intentionally homeless.

You would have to sell the house, rent privately and live on the money from that until you run out, wait to be evicted and only then would be eligible to join the list. From there you would be lowest priority as you had a house and intentionally made yourself homeless. You would then likely go into temp accommodation which, take it from me, is grim.

I joined when I was 18 and didn't get anywhere until I was 34 and even then it wasn't council, it was housing association which is only slightly less expensive than private rent.

Your Council should have a Housing Advice Team (may be called something else eg Homelessness Prevention Team, Housing Options). Make an appointment and talk to them as your first step. You can also try Shelter for advice.

could you sell, use your equity to buy a shared ownership and potentially qualify for housing benefit for the bit you don't own

Sounds grim and no surprise that you are feeling so desperate but my advice is to do everything you can to keep your mortgage payments up and stay in your house. Someone suggested getting a lodger and that's very good advice especially if said lodger was a handyman and could help you out with some repair work. Also maybe there are local charities that might help with the repairs needed? Or an appeal on your local facebook group? There are some lovely kind community minded people out there. I wish you lots of luck and hope you find solutions. I remember being young and struggling to pay my mortgage and I am glad I kept going. It will get easier so please hang in there xxx

CDP? Do you have a child with additional needs?

OP this sounds very overwhelming. As you say you have hardly anything left if repairs were done I would rather sell and then rent privately and wait on a council house list. UC would too up whatever you need and you will no longer be struggling like this. I worry as I have been on a downward debt spiral in the past and it is really an awful position to be in.

I hope there are better solutions for you from
others but please have the peace of mind that if it is all too much you can do what I said and end this struggle and build yourself up again.

I’m sorry OP, but you really need to look at your priorities. I know you want to treat your dc’s, but it is far more important that you have a safe and liveable house, than trips to the beach and ice creams. Your friend is correct, you need to go through your banking app (or preferably get help from Citizens Advice, to do this), to see where your money is going and what you can cut out. I know what it is like to be counting every penny and it’s hard, but this is what you really need to do.

I am really surprised that you actually got a mortgage on your house. Mortgage lenders normally insist on any major issues being put right, before they will loan you the money, or at least that’s what happens in Scotland.

It's overwhelming weight on your shoulders, with debt hanging over you and worrying how to get repairs done or paid for. But there is help out there as others have mentioned through Citizens' Advice, Shelter etc. And there are things you can do yourself, so do not panic and throw in the towel. With a bit of help and reassurance you can get through the worst of this.

Your local council is a good place to start looking - for lots of different things: help with council tax, finding local voluntary or community schemes, grants for home repairs, volunteers who help with domestic jobs or home maintenance, info about access to community kitchens that give out food or finding befrienders or volunteers to support families under stress. Check out the website or go to the town hall.

Apply to the Council under the Household Support Fund - a government scheme to help struggling families with the cost of living - not related to state benefits or income but based on need. Information here: https://www.gov.uk/cost-living-help-local-council

To recap - as already mentioned by posters:

Claim for repairs under house insurance
Extend term of mortgage or ask for mortgage holiday
Check out benefit entitlements with Citizens' Advice
Take in a student lodger - won't affect single person discount on council tax
Get community free food, clothing etc.
Get budgeting help from reputable debt charities
Get financial and /or practical help with repairs from family or father of children
Read up on cutting bills on money saving expert website
Increase income from working from home, online etc or part-time bank staff e.g. for answering calls to the NHS or local surgery.

Looks like you could qualify due to being unable to fund repairs. Check with your LA

If I were you I would call my mortgage provider and ask for a 6 month mortgage holiday. Explain your circumstances.

Some banks will allow this. It means the interest will still build up during those 6 months but you don’t have to pay any mortgage payment.

It’s in the banks interest to do this because repossession is much more expensive than non payment for 6 months.

that should give you some breathing space.

when your mortgage term comes up for renewal I would speak to a broker to get your payments low by any means necessary- you could add to the term for example.

In the interim if you need to borrow money for the roof then do it. Make sure you get three quotes from reputable roofers to make sure you’re not getting ripped off. Do you know someone who is handy who could help for free?

I think you're seeing everything as terrible because you're so exhausted. But look, OP, you've got a job with decent part-time income, and you bought your own house, and your kids sound like they get a lovely life. Stick in there with the house. Can you see where the drip is coming from? We had a leak a few months ago when the rain was thundering down and it turned out to be at the edge of one of those tiny roof skylights in the loft. Used some expandable foam on it and the leak stopped.

What are your monthly outgoings? Mortgage, debt, bills etc?

It's just life living with raw sewage 🙄

Boiler also needs looked at, there must be a leak as the pressure drops to the point of not working roughly every 3 weeks.

Try bleeding the radiators with a radiator key. I appreciate this is not the point of the thread but it took me an age to realise I was even supposed to when I moved into my first rental house.

Leaky roof.

Don't panic. If you are in one of the many areas at the moment that are affected by the flash flooding, it may not be as bad as you think. Our roof has been studied from multiple angles by a range of roofie expert types and declared solid each time. We get a damp wall every so often when the rain is particularly hard and coming in for a specific angle. Failing that it's fine. It may also not be your roof. Invest in a dehumidifier (check Facebook market place) and run it gently for a bit. Don't go mental with it as it is can cause cracks if you do at it too hard. If this is not an option get lots of cheap cat litter (Fullers earth) and place in open trays near the wall to absorb moisture. Run the heating if you can afford to. Lay newspaper at the base of any affected walls so you can monitor any new leaks.

As someone mentioned upthread- gutters. Bane of my life.

I feel your pain here. Houses are a fecking money pit. BUT it is surprising how far the status of homeowner will get you if you need it to and with your own property you have a lot more security. Sorry you are going through this.

I’m so sorry to hear that. I think what went in our favour was that they struggle to fill these houses. People don’t often move out but when they do they can be empty for a while. The HA told me to write a letter to the council explaining the circumstances and that there was a house here for us. So we weren’t on any list, the council approved it and the HA offered the house to us. I think the key issue with this though is the location.

How much is your mortgage each month? You might be able to take a mortgage holiday for a few months after you have been there for a year. It could give you a chance to save some money to pay off debts or get some repairs done.

I’d like to chime in about Council Tax. Check you’re getting a single person discount. Apply for Council Tax Support if you haven’t done so already and ensure you tell them about the DLA. Your income may exclude you from Council Tax Support, but it’s worth checking. Ask if there’s a discretionary support scheme for council tax. You can also get your instalments spread over 12 months instead of 10.

Also have a look on your council’s website for a local welfare assistance scheme / household support fund.

I wish you all the best, OP.

as above you cant make yourself intenionally homeless to get a council place

you have to wait till your literally thrown out due to reposession an even then could be put in a b an b for months even years

i'm not attempting to minimise your issues, raw sewage and leaking roofs are, obviously, not things you can live with indefinitely. but i do think it's quite normal, particularly now building and materials are so expensive, to have to live with less than perfect homes. we've got damp, and windows which don't close and crumbling plaster in places, and and and, but unless you're very well off that's just life i think

I am sorry OP. Can you rehome the dog? Buying food for you and shoes is more important.

I know people who sold their house to get a council house (it's free, didn't you know it, people?!) ignoring everyone's advice. The council said they made themselves homeless and they also had money from the sale. Now they live with relatives because prices have skyrocketed and they can't afford to rent either!

OP I just want to say no you're not an idiot. You were desperate to get out of homelessness and you did the best you could property-wise.

Don't be too hard on yourself, you had no reason to know about all the issues with the house. You should have seen me when I bought for the first time... not a clue. You were unlucky.

It's understandable that you hate the house while it's bleeding you dry but I hope you can get voluntary help and/or a grant for repairs and start to make it your own.

I was brought up by a single mum. She's my hero.

Is there no claim on your insurance? Roof leaks are often wear and tear issues but putting right internally is sometimes covered under accidental damage.

With the boiler you'd be surprised how long you can make a boiler losing pressure last. We have been in this state for three years now. A qualified friend has checked it for us and there is nothing unsafe we have to just keep restarting it before a bath, you make do.

I’m so sorry you are going through this. You have had some great advice but two things sprung to mind after reading your posts:

1. Your younger DC has SEN - why is he not allowed to attend wraparound club? Is that because he himself couldn’t cope or because the school have told you that they won’t take him? If the latter, then could you try and push back on the grounds that they are leaving themselves open to being accused of disability discrimination? I talk from direct experience of having a child with SEN myself but seeing a child with quite extreme needs attending wraparound club at our school on a regular basis as his single parent mother has to work
2. You mention the possibility of the DC living with their Dad for a year but that this would mean them having to change schools. I know it’s not ideal and we all want to maintain stability for our children, but it seems to me that this is your best chance to get back on your feet? Children are much more resilient than we give them credit for. You might even find that a new school for your younger child would be more supportive?