Do you know what's in your parents' Will(s)?

Yes. My brother and I have both been gifted sums to help with home buying. Our parents have made it clear inheritance will be split equally, minus anything we were gifted previously. Grandkids don’t feature because I’m childfree and my brother had two kids so they didn’t think it would be fair.

I knew exactly what was in my late Mum's will. Until he died, she had left everything equally to me and my brother, with modest equal bequests to her three grandchildren and a small amount to her church. She updated her will after he died, and left everything to me, with the same amounts to the grandchildren and church. My husband and I have got almost mirror wills, leaving everything to our daughter on the second death, or to my two nephews if she should die before both of us. The only difference is that I've left some money to Breast Cancer Now and to my best friend, with the explicit request that she spends it all on treating herself - she has always been really short of money and I'd love to think of her being able to splurge some money on designer clothes or a new little car. In the event of me outliving her, the money I've left to her would go to her daughter with the same stipulation. My daughter knows what is in our wills and I would be very disappointed if she had any objections to my bequests.

I know what's in my parent's, I have a copy of it. They're leaving 100% of whatever is leftover after end of life care to charity once they're both gone.

I have six siblings and they said they raised us to be self sufficient, which we all are, so we're all happy with the choice. If things go as they're currently going there's going to be a lot of very happy donkeys one day.

I know what's in my mum's and what's in my inlaws. My mum's because she updated it after my dad died and my inlaws because I pushed fil to put mil on the deeds to the house and make the wills in the first place. In both cases, I was asked to read them and give my opinion.

My parents are divorced. I'm the middle of 3. Dad said years ago he was leaving everything to my older brother. No idea what is in my mum's will, but I suspect it will all go to my younger brother as she's always been very clear that he is her favourite. All I'm expecting is a letter pointing out that I am, and always have been, a crap daughter.

Yes, all to the other whoever dies first.

Then, approx 45% each to me and my sibling. Approx 10% split between gifts to other family members (much younger, single childless sibling of one parent e.g.) and legacies to charities / church.

No, I've got no idea if my parents even have wills.
They've got nothing to leave though and they live in a HA house.

I was with my mum when she sorted it….she leave her 5 GC 10k each ….then the rest of her money and sale of the house she leaves to me and my brother ….she also leaves 2k to dogs trust and 2k to a donkey sanctuary…..she keeps a copy in a fire proof A4 bag in her wardrobe

My parents have always joked that they are spending our inheritance 🤣 however we have never had a serious conversation about it. My parents aren’t particularly wealthy - they have some money which was left to them when my grandparents passed away. They’ve always treated my brother and I equally.
DH and I really do need to make a will as our situation is complicated as there is a step child as well as our shared DC

My husband and I have mirror wills and after that we split everything between our son and grandchildren but we have also left 2 stipulated amounts to the charities that mean something to us. Dementia ( my mother died of it) and cancer research ( my mother in law died of it. ) There is a scheme where if you leave some money to a charity in your will some solicitors do the wills for free . That's what we did and consider it a win win situation. Oh and our son knows this and thinks it's a great idea.

I do. My mum has split it equally between me and brother but as she helped me alot with my house and he didn't ask/need the help I have to pay him the money left I owe my mum from my share if that makes sense. I also get the dog 😁She's always been very big on being fair. I doubt I'd get anything from my dad as it would all be left to my step mum who's a bit younger and that's fair I guess as I don't make as much effort with them for various reasons.

Actually it’s not necessarily a thankless task- my whole family was amazingly thoughtful and careful of my feelings, but everything was fairly split 11 ways including charities who were also incredibly gracious and thoughtful in every interaction. But if I’d been going through the process of administrating an estate and grieving a parent and feeling it was unfair it’d have broken me. Sorry, a bit of projection going on here!

Honestly then I’d tell them to revise it and you certainly shouldn’t be executor. It’s a thankless gruelling task.
I’ve just done it for an adored relative and as a result asked my parents to not name executor. Apart from anything else even if you don’t resent your siblings for the will (you’d be a saint not to) you’ll resent them as you liaise with funeral directors organise probate house clearance etc. and they’ll either walk on eggshells offering you support but not seeming to meddle- it’d take the judgement of Solomon from you all to get through the process unscathed.
I’m really angry on your behalf!!

My mum asked me once if I thought I should get more money than my sister. My sister and BIL have inherited lots of aunts and his parents plus are in both mouth better paid jobs and so are minted. I explicitly told her to split 50/50. My sister is would definitely feel hurt otherwise. She is likely to be very generous with the money (as she is now) but it boils down to being treated equally. Sibling jealousy still hurts when you are adults even in functioning families.

Are you expecting them to leave a sizeable amount? If you leave a certain proportion to charity, you get a reduction on Inheritance Tax. Though I'm not sure it ever works out that the other beneficiaries get more than they would have done if none went to charity and the higher rate of IHT was paid.

DH and I are financially solvent due to having good careers. My siblings aren’t so my mother’s view is that they need financial support more than I do.

It wouldn’t be the sort of decision I’d make but it’s her money so she can do what she likes with it.

Her parents split their not inconsiderable assets between her and her sibling equally despite them being in very different financial positions so not sure where she got the idea from.

It is a lot of money as well so the ridiculous part of it is that when my siblings do eventually inherit they’ll likely end up in a better financial position than I’m in despite never having earned a quarter of what I earn.

The only thing that annoys me is there is no provision for my DS. My siblings don’t even have any children.

Parents have left everything to each other, then split equally between my sister and I. I presume there will be a few small charity legacies. I remember going with them to make those wills when I was about 8

My father encouraged his father to leave everything to his sibling (and was the executor). In terms of their earnings it definitely was the right thing to do.

My parents are in their seventies, they are both lawyers (my father still working) and I'm not a bit sure they have made wills. You can't tell them what to do either, so basically it will all be a bit of a mess at some point. I just think "Sufficient unto the day" which I know is not the Mumsnet way.

No idea - it's entirely their business.

I find the whole notion of expecting inheritance or thinking you are entitled to anything very crass and distasteful.

My parents earned it and should spend it on making their life as happy and comfortable as they can.

For many people, yes, but given she lives in a council house on a state pension, with no savings, it’s not really a problem. It’s not like there’s going to be much of an estate to deal with.

i have a will myself.

Yes my parents have mirror wills and then when they both go my brother gets their home and we split any remaining cash (there will be very little) 50:50.

My parents helped me out and loaned me the money to buy my home so I was mortgage free at 30 with the peace of mind that brings. I have paid them back but my brother will never have the earning potential I have so it's fair and in all likelihood I will give him the remaining cash if there is any.

In my will everything goes to DD but my brother will hold in trust till she's 25. If she and I both die it goes to my brother.

I wonder if where one sibling has no financial worries and the second is struggling, the first would mind their share going to the second if his//her parents explained their reasoning?

I'm in the position of being the former, I understand, and wonder how others would feel.

Yes. They've discussed it openly with me & siblings.

Often the if husband dies everything goes to wife and vice-versa

So the OP is not making it clear as the money would go to charities when both died and if any money assets were remains taking out car home fees

Care home fees in London average about 12k per month for something half-decent

Everyone should remortgage their homes at a certain age and enjot their life but doing on monthly hols