Do you know what's in your parents' Will(s)?

Yes but I expect if my father dies first the will will be changed and I won't be included. I'm definitely not factoring an inheritance into my future plans that's for sure.

50/50 with my sibling.

Only FIL left now. He's made a will leaving everything 50/50 between his son (my dh, married to me with 2 sons) and daughter (married with 2 daughters). However, if one of them has died then the other gets everything, nothing goes to their surviving spouse or their children (FILs grandchildren). I wouldn't mind but all his property, money etc came from late MIL as he hardly ever worked a day in his life. He now relies heavily on only me for day to day care, as his daughter and her family live far away, I'm the first person he phones when he needs help, which is frequently. Also, my dh is in very poor health which everyone in the family knows about and FIL will probably outlive him. Maybe I'm awful but it hurt me to think why couldn't he have made his will so that if one of his adult children die, then their spouse and children inherit their share. It makes me feel a bit resentful that I run around after him, help him on a daily basis, but he obviously doesn't view me as his family and doesn't care what happens to me and his grandchildren if dh passes away first. I'm good enough to look after him but not good enough to inherit any of his money. It makes me sound like a terrible person but I've actually thought, if anything happens to dh, I'll just have nothing more to do with FIL and he can pay for a carer.

Yes, there's a copy in my safe. Mirror wills to each other, then everything to me as I'm an only child. If I pre decease them, then everything split evenly between my children.

They're comfortably well off, but I'm not assuming anything as one or both might need care at some point.

Neither of my parents had wills, but they also had nothing to leave other than the odd personal item

My grandmother left a will, yes i knew exactly what it said, i was the only beneficiary and also the executor, she kept me updated every time she changed it (to write people out) at the time i didnt like it, i am literally now dealing with everything and i now understand why she kept updating me, i hate that we needed to have those conversations but they were necessary

You and your brother are good people.

Yes i know what is in my mum's, though we eventually had to invoke our LPA to see that she hadnt altered it and it remained exactly as ut had alwats been (a sibling asked not to inherit directly and she told them shed changed it, but she hadn't. When my dad died we were just delighted not to inherit his debts.

Based on things I've heard from others (not personally) I would NEVER leave money to charity in a will. The main problem is leaving percentages, but even then, I agree that you simply can't know what your situation or your families' situation will be years or decades ahead. (Also since I work with older people, I see the shitty daytime TV 'help us save this kitten' charity ads far too much and I've come to dislike most of the sector. But that's just me).

I have a will and also a Letter of Wishes to my executors which includes my funeral preferences and preferred charity for funeral donations to go to. They could always request a major donation in a letter like that, but allowing their executors to take a view on the priorities at the time.

Yes and I have copies of both, I’m also the executrix.

Leaving fixed amounts is potentially dangerous, as it could be the charities end up with everything and there is zero residual.
Better would be something like '£100k or 10% whichever is smaller' or something.

Nope, and I doubt they'd tell me...

I've always known that it stipulates everything to be divided 50/50 between me and my sister.

My parents would quite simply never have considered doing it any other way and drummed this into us.

My parents are deceased and I was executor for both. I had copies of their wills and knew where they kept the originals. They were always upfront that everything was left to each other and then split equally between their 4 DC. We talked about it in advance and I know that my DM had been upset about her DB being favoured in her DPs wills. When splitting their possessions we agreed a rule that if we had gifted the item to my DP, we got first dibs, and my DBs agreed I would take my DMs (inexpensive) jewellery as I wear it. We also agreed and made a small number of gifts to others on my DP behalf.

Our children are only teens but know what is in our wills (left to each other/split equally between DC/who guardians are etc). And our executors know this too and where the originals are stored (with a service). We've even paid for support for the executors to manage the process in advance, and update every year a list of accounts held etc which is stored alongside the will.

I also have copies of my siblings and DUs wills as I am executor for those too. Everything is left as per intestate rules, split equally. What I or my DC inherit is dependent on who and what is left at the time they pass - I also have access to spreadsheets which set out details of their assets, but don't check those out of privacy.

I believe that everyone should make their own decisions about where to leave their assets, but that it is much simpler all round to discuss in advance. It avoids any upset. And practically sharing information makes the thankless task of being an executor much easier.

I've known for years. It's good to know it's all sorted. My parents wills left everything equally between me and my siblings despite the fact one sibling is obnoxious and I do and will continue to do all the 'caring' etc. I encouraged my parents to leave everything equally. It's the right thing to do.

Just my Dad left now and he’s 91, he and my Mom had mirror wills .
I know that his estate is split three ways with me and my sister getting a third each and the final third will be split between my two sons, my sister doesn’t have children and I’m not sure I feel entirely comfortable with whether that’s fair.

Obviously that could be hugely helpful to my sons, both in their 20s. However while one is already paying a mortgage the other still lives at home and should he inherit a large sum of money in the next few years (which is highly likely with a 91 year old grandfather) I can see it being squandered on a camper van, holidays and clothes when it’s intended to help with a house purchase (although this isn’t stipulated in the will).

I don't know amounts as obviously they don't know exactly what they'll be left with, but I know the division of assets. Care could be needed for a very long time though.

Yes. My mum has left a specified amount to each of her grandchildren and the rest split three ways between me and my siblings.

I've a pretty good idea because my sibling told me. Sibling is very nosy and very money oriented while I am neither. I would never ask our parents for details, but my rather greedy and already well off sibling would, and did. Then told me, which I suppose is useful information.

So as far as I know, the will is split 50/50 between us. I suppose I'm glad to know as there's a sizeable inheritance there, but I also feel uncomfortable knowing about it unofficially.

However, I may have the last laugh, as my mother has told me she doesn't want my sibling's spouse in the house in the event of her death before I get there (I live overseas). She's worried sibling's spouse will help themselves. Not on my watch, they won't.

I did know years ago (everything to me, a named charity instead should I predecease her) but it's been a long time since it's come up so it's possible it's changed since then.

My grandad for the most part didn't talk about his (apparently he got it out once when drunk when I was about 6, but I don't know if anyone actually found out what was in it or if they just told him to put it away before he had chance to tell anyone.) When my parents separated when I was 10, Grandad said he'd made a new will cutting Mum out - Mum explained that that was because he didn't want any of his money going to Dad in the event that anything happened to him while Mum and Dad were still technically legally married (Grandad had had a heart attack about 4 months before they split up, so I can quite easily believe that was on his mind). He was never open about the will after that - every so often Mum would say "I hope he remembered to put me back!" (He did - the will that was eventually processed when he died was dated three years after Dad remarried and it would have become a non-issue, Mum got an equal share with her two brothers).

My mother knows exactly what's in mine (I updated it today) because I've appointed her guardian to my DC so she kind of needs to know. I don't know what's in hers but I have a copy and she's always said she'll split evenly between my sister and I. If for some reason she hasn't we'll sort it out between us.

@YorkshireTrailRunner , I’ve read and reread your post and I don’t understand your concern.
Your parents have left money to charities but you’re concerned if they need care? That doesn’t make sense to me?

Yes, my mother and I made our wills together years ago and I have the copies. Hers won't be changed now, because she has dementia.

Do you know how much has been left to charities OP? The reason I mention is because sometimes charities offer free will writing services if you agree to a legacy to be left to that charity which is included in the will.

My mum did it years ago and left a nominal sum to a charity of her choice, it was only £50 though! But she got the will for free.

You may be worrying unduly, but if in doubt have a conversation with them, I think it's important to know your parents wishes with regards to care etc, especially if you're going to be the sole person dealing with it when the time comes, so it shouldn't be a taboo subject to ask them about.

You need to know what charities have been left something, and whether it's a percentage or a fixed sum.

Large charities, but some smaller ones as well, are ruthless in getting their money or what they decide is the amount they should receive from someone's will.

So if they decide a house is worth first example 600k as they are going to get a percentage e.g. 10% of it, but all valuations you are getting are 400K they will harass you as an executor while you are grieving your deceased love one.

Ah, "The Will" - my mother and her husband delighted in trying to torment me for over 20 years with threats, promises, and playing siblings off against each other.
Who was to be executor, who will benefit and to what degree, which one was in favour etc.
The final straw came when my mother sat at my kitchen table and informed me, with a malicious sneer on her face that "depending on how you treat (her husband) after I'm gone you MIGHT get something ".
Apparently I was supposed to look after the racist, misogynistic, abusive pig.
This was after she stole a huge amount from me to feed her gambling addiction, and they were both abusive towards me and my DC.
That was it, after a lifetime of deception, lies and theft, I broke.
Cut all contact.
My sister, after years of hating them both and banning them from her house, has swooped in at their final years and is convinced she'll inherit everything.
I am free though, and that's priceless to me.
My father died when I was a teenager, his money was gambled away by my mother.
My widowed MIL has given out copies of her will to the family. I haven't read it, as I don't need to know.
Sorry for the novel 🙄

Same! No idea. Happy to leave it that way, tbh.