School won't send certificates

thanks @the2andahalfmillion and others.

agree that some posters are being unpleasant - esp when they repeat the suggestion that the OP arrange for a courier to collect the certs - even though we've already been told that the school wasn't willing to accept this solution, as they wanted advance notice of the name of any nominated person (who would turn up with photo ID) before allowing them to collect. A lot of courier companies would not provide the name of the courier in advance.

And I agree there is an unpleasant undertone (or overtone) to many of the messages here, which have variously implied: OP's son is incompetent, and immature if he can't sort all this out himself; OP/ son is friendless in the old area for good reasons; OP is unreasonable for questioning school response solely because what schools' say is always correct, and finally: everyone is telling you you're wrong so get a grip and accept it.

Really not very becoming at all, no matter if you personally would have handled this situation differently. I wouldn't dream of speaking to a friend or even casual acquaintance in this way and I'm not sure why it's become acceptable online. Women don't need other women as enemies. We have men for that.

Am still with the OP. It's a perfectly reasonable request on their part and the hectoring/ forceful support of this school's not very well-explained or justified rules is a bit annoying. Sure, schools are under resourced and can't be nipping to the post office willy nilly but I've done the kid of job that would recieve a request like this and I would not have reacted to the OP in the manner described here. Unhelpful, unimaginative and rigid.

You are not being bullied. That's not how bullying works.

Why would you assume it's the same across the whole county, though? Do we even know what county it is?

I was wondering why they couldn't send them as that's how my DS got his. I don't know if we're in the same county or not. But if lots of other institutions have no issue sending certificates it does seem odd that others do and particularly that so many people believe it would be unthinkable to send a certificate through the post!

However, it does appear most schools do have a problem with sending certificates so that's that, I suppose!

Can anyone adult not provide their own lunch and snacks?

I remember my postie standing at the door on results day. He was desperate to know my results. He had been our postie since I was a baby.
He gave me a congratulations card.
It was a really nice way to get your results.

If 100 people are saying the same thing then you’ve got your answer. YABU.

Some comments are sneery on MN and you knew that was the nature of the forum before you posted. It’s not personal to you. It happens to everybody.

Just take on board what has been said. It is your family’s responsibility to pick up the certificates whether that’s you or your son.

Normal here .

You can't take a range of A-levels without busing between sixth form campuses - it varies year on year what each sixth form offers.

For one of our kids the suggestion was he take one A-level on the site and other three others elsewhere - so spending more time on other sixth form campuses. One of DD friends face with same choice transferred to other sixth form and then came back for the one at this school - downside travel cost to other sixth form - them being picking about which transfer bus she was allowed on - ie not previous schools and insisting on holding onto GCSE certificates for another two years.

Honestly it's another reason ours went to nearby college- it may not be your area normal but it hardly rare here.

How many kids do one A Level at one school and then transfer somewhere else?
Hardly a normal situation, really.

Don't know if you can force the school - but similar attitude with DC secondary.

DC secondary keep them all - some GCSE done early - if they do one A-level there but transfer to another school still keep them all and have restrictive pick up days and times in February months after exams are done.

The real kicker that gets me though is they don't actually inform the kids who leave - the bulk of them - when they can pick them up. They rely on younger siblings at school and word of mouth.

They don't have active e-mails for kids don't send letter or texts or parents e-mails - not tweets or Facebook nothing even on school webpage- don't inform kids before leaving. Ex A-level students date turned up in school news letter only kids and parents still at school see - GCSE even more obscure. You chase with school and they get very unhelpful.

Oddest bloody thing - and to make it worse college just down road sends them in the normal post no drama no chasing. In most of other sixth forms here according to DC friends just post as well.

Sadly easiest thing to do is just to suck it up and pick certificates up - you have them and it's done but I can see it's annoying to sort out but I expect you'll get it's always been done this way and no one complained before and no shift in attitude.

🙄

You clearly expect everyone to solve your issues!

No friends close enough to collect....... oh surprise

I think if you review the tone of your own OP you might understand why you’ve received the responses you have. Referring to school administrators as being “jobs worth” is just plain offensive. It isn’t “mad” to expect a student to collect their exam certificates from the school where they took their exams. Considering legal action to “force them to send them” seems like bullying to me.

Perhaps when you calm down and stop feeling so cross you might be able to make an enjoyable trip of it.

I agree with all of that @Malbecfan.

The nearest post office to our school is about a fifteen minute walk away. There is nobody who could be spared for 35 minutes to go to the post office. And it would take longer to drive and park than it would to walk.

I haven't seen any bullying. What I did see was the OP demanding that the school posts them to her/her DS because THEY have moved away.

I teach in a state school. There is NO spare money. To send them by recorded delivery means a member of staff would have to go to a Post Office. There are none close by, so they would have to drive. They would have to take their own vehicle, and as they would be on school business, they would require business insurance on their car. The member of staff would be entitled to petrol money and to have any other expenses reimbursed such as parking costs. Our admin staff have been pared back - people leaving have not been replaced due to the abysmal level of funding in state schools - so I'm not sure who would actually be able to go out for the hour it would take. Yes, OP, you have offered to "pay" but can you see what an administrative pain it is for the school to "just send them"?

The school has offered an alternative, which is a named person with appropriate ID collecting them. I get it that neither choice is ideal for you, but sometimes that's how it goes. Sorry.

Perhaps send your adult child on public transport to collect them? He might enjoy the day out. Give him money for lunch and snacks.

Give an adult money for lunch and snacks???

Nobody is bullying you, op.

Inconvenient to collect his own certificates. Ok. Let him go without them then.

Perhaps send your adult child on public transport to collect them? He might enjoy the day out. Give him money for lunch and snacks.

To be fair, you set the 'sneery' tone of the thread early on when you rudely dismissed someone's suggestion of using a courier.

Answers on Mumsnet are always repetitive because a large percentage of users can't be arsed to read all the responses. I'm sure you wouldn't have been so dismissive if the 100+ comments had told you that you should take legal action against the school.

I think your choices are

Drive there and back to collect them.
Go on public transport to collect them.
Your son drives to collect them.
Your son goes on public transport to collect them.

It may seem unreasonable to you, but the school has declined to do what you ask, so I don’t think you have any other choices.

It’s not particularly helpful to cite what happens in Scotland or in any other English county. Wherever the OP is, that is the information she’s been given.

"Surely that’s a breach of GDPR as what authority do they have to keep the certificates after the child has left the school?"

🤣🤣 what?

OP you've not said why you or your son can't just go and collect them. That's why people are baffled and repeating things. It's fucking bizarre that you just refuse to drive a couple of hours. Have lunch out or something, visit some old haunts, make a day of it.

It's not bullying. If you ask for opinions then some people will agree with you, others will have a different view. That isn't bullying.

Welcome to Mumsnet!!