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AIBU?

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Original poster

To feel like I have to pay this off for DD’s sake? How can I do it?

332 replies

Hyre · 21/05/2024 08:18

This situation is making me feel unwell. I have 200k left on a mortgage. I’m 36. If I don’t pay this off by the time DD is at school (ie by the time I’m 40) I feel like she is going to be at such a huge huge disadvantage in life as I am a single parent with cms that as everyone knows is unpredictable. This is causing me a lot of stress. I try and overpay but sacrifice my own eating to do this.

i don’t feel like she will have the same opportunity as a child in a two parent household otherwise. How can I achieve this? I feel constantly stressed

OP posts:
modgepodge · 21/05/2024 08:22

why would your daughter be disadvantaged by you having a mortgage when she starts school? I’d imagine the majority of children starting school have parents who owe money for a mortgage or have to pay rent. Hardly anyone this age is mortgage free surely? I don’t know anyone who is (other than my parents and PIL) and I’m 37.

by all means overpay now if you can afford it as it reduces overall payments but don’t sacrifice eating to do so!!

Neolara · 21/05/2024 08:22

Literally nobody pays off a 200k mortgage in4 years. The entire point of a mortgage is to spread the payments over a very long period of time so that it is manageable. Most home owning 40 year olds will have mortgages. In the kindest possible way, you're being completely ridiculous.

LakesideInn · 21/05/2024 08:22

Don’t put your own health at risk. That won’t help your child. Most 2 parent families won’t have paid off their mortgages by the time their child leaves school let alone starts!

Newmumatlast · 21/05/2024 08:21

Most 2 parent households wouldn't have paid a house off by then so I don't understand

MaryBethMayfair · 21/05/2024 08:21

As gently as possible, you're being absurd. You don't need to pay off your mortgage by 40 for your daughter to have a nice life. Being mortgage free doesn't stop you from ever being stressed or having financial pressures.

Do you work? It sounds like you are struggling to make ends meet so I'd suggest you check if you are due any benefits top-ups or whether you could increase your working hours/improve your position at work.

TwattyMcFuckFace · 21/05/2024 08:21

If you can afford to pay 50k a year, surely you can afford to keep a bit back for food?

Or just pay your normal monthly payments, leaving more than enough to spend on your DC?

Chrissmasjammies · 21/05/2024 08:20

Please don’t put this pressure on yourself. Over pay if you can but there’s no need to set that specific deadline. I hope to have mine paid by the year my child hopefully starts college.

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