Neighbours daughter

Everyone saying she may feel bad about someone else treating her daughter. What did she think would happen when she accepted the offer of her daughter going to the fair? For her daughter to watch her friends having fun and her daughter missing out?!

I’m an only child and now have two children and agree it’s lonely. However I would never say that to someone who only have one child for so many reasons, most which make the mum of the only child feel so bad

Such a shame your good deed was received so negatively by your neighbours daughters mum. Sadly I suspect all she's done is ruin any further 'fun' days out her daughter could of have because of her attitude. I just feel saddened about the whole story. Stay true to yourself, you sound like a genuinely caring person

I would feel unhappy and uncomfortable with the mum’s reaction. The comment that you are spending your husband’s money is off too. It seems to me that the mum has come across as weird, judgmental and aggressive. I would be done with it and encourage your kids to find friendship elsewhere.

This 100%. Understand why you'd be annoyed with her OP but try to be empathetic and let it go. Don't offer to do anything involving any significant amounts of money again with the little girl. Thank you for being kind to her.

I have an only child (not by choice) and I think it was very kind of you to think of the child and bring her out for the day. Even if she is stressed out with money it’s a rude and unreasonable reaction and especially the snide remarks about “husband’s money”. Some people are just strange I suppose.

Rather than focusing on the fact her child had a lovely time, she’s focusing on the fact she feels guilty or a bit shitty as a result.

Those are the kind of feelings most people keep to themselves. By vocalising her feelings she’s come across as rude and ungrateful and it’s only her daughter who’s now going to suffer as a result. You did absolutely nothing wrong. This is all on her.

Is ‘cinema room’ 2024’s ‘room for a pony’?

Yes, it would clearly have been a far different experience if they just watched Taylor Swift on the knackered living room tv.😀

I love how you intentionally snuck in the 'cinema room' part 🤣🤣🤣

I wouldn’t cut back on the play dates I would just avoid the mother and taking them anywhere where you have to spend any money. The daughter sounds lovely.

If your kid goes to a fair with someone you send them with some money otherwise you know that other parent will be spending. You can’t get pissed off with someone for not excepting your child to just stand at watch other kids on rides. The husbands money was a nasty dig that just made her look a bit of a twat.

God she is a bit of a cow isn't she - i would cut back on the playdates.

It sounds like she has taken your act of kindness as an act of pity, and is a bit embarrassed she doesn't have the money to take her child to these things or to pay you back.

I would talk to her and explain it all and if she is still rude or put out leave her to it, and it's just unfortunate her kid will now miss out

I think it’s fine as long as you aren’t expecting compensation.

the mom was probably processing her own feelings after it being ‘the best day ever’.

my partner and I have a huge discrepancy in income. So if he plans the date he pays, it’s to his comfort level, and same with me. We just alternate dates (or hotel bookings on vacation etc). Same could apply for play dates.

she told me I shouldn't be spending my husbands money (I'm a sahm) on her child as it makes her feel bad because both her and her husband work but don't have the spare funds.

Well, they do, but have decided to spend those funds on themselves instead given they gave two new Teslas.

Poor kid.

What an idiot! She is resented probably exacerbated by her child remarks of best day ever. Poor kid but you keep distance and ignore the crazy.

Ah... this is a "take some biscuits around and ask to start again" conversation.

We don't know what caused her to behave like this, but it wasn't anything that you have done.

Time to be the bigger person OP and listen to her. She might be in a difficult situation... or she might be a cunt but its best to make sure first.

I’m totally working class and my kids went to school with millionaires, never would I have denied them a day out or experience as I was angry I had to work or couldn’t afford to do the same and never once was I anything but appreciative to the parents

YANBU and it takes a special kind of arsehole to lash out at someone who treated your child for no other reason than they thought the child would enjoy themselves.

And as for "hurt people, hurt people". Being embarrassed because you feel like you can't/won't reciprocate isn't being hurt. That's being embarrassed, and being too immature or petty to behave like most normal people would, by thanking the other parent and maybe offering for their child to come over to watch a movie as they can't reciprocate with a day out.

You sound lovely 🩷

She’s jealous — probably of both you being a SAHM (because she got that little dig in) and that she didn’t get to give her daughter ‘the best day ever’.

Her DD probably went on and on about it and she got fed up.

She’ll probably be embarrassed about how she spoke to you later.

That incredibly rude comment aside, you were taking them to the fair, so what did she expect?! It involves spending. If she had certain expectations about that spending she should have communicated that beforehand. Wow.

Can you imagine if you'd taken her and not treated her the same? She'd have a thread of her own up here before you could say fairground! Bleating about how her child was treated like an outsider, forced to watch your kids have fun and treats right under her nose etc

If the mother can't afford stuff then she should be happy someone else was happy to provide her with a treat. This is def more about mums jealous nature than you. To say spend your husbands money - personally it's a shame for the child but that's one family I'd give a wide berth. Sounds Toxic!

I wasn’t an only child but was friends with a girl who was, her family would take me away with them. Isle of Wight, Brighton, Margate it was amazing! They never once asked my parents for money as we would have the girl at ours for dinner/sleepovers too. I’d be so grateful for that type of village and know that someone cares enough about my child so they don’t miss out.

You’ve done nothing wrong, I’d be so grateful for what you did I’ve be bringing you a lovely bottle of wine to stay thank you.
Sounds like the other parent isn’t as financial stable and perhaps jealous.