Are you reluctant to invite people to your house, in case they're jealous ?

No, I don't tend to invite people over because it's a tip!

DH used to live in a nice but normal house in a nice area and quotes would go stratospheric as soon as the person walked down the drive. Quoting over £100 k to paint the outside for example. This was circa 1998.

It just meant that he ended up doing almost everything himself (not regulated stuff obviously).

Nah, they're not humble bragging, they're just mean. So many rich people are really mean.

We had a huge (ramshackle, dirty) house when i was growing up. My parents were the most sociable people in the world and loved having people over. If anyone felt uncomfortable, they included themselves out, as it were. Parents lost most of their wealth in the Lloyds crash at the end of the 80s and downsized to a tiny bungalow. Their love of life and earlier sociableness stood them in very good stead when they were down on their luck, people still visited and enjoyed their company. God I miss them.

When we lived in a big house my father was convinced every time we asked a tradesman for a quote that we would get ripped off. He would fake an Essex accent every time he spoke to tradesman and try and convince them if he "wasn't too busy ducking and diving for a living" that he would do the work himself. Once when he was talking to an electrician instead of using a fake Essex accent he used an fake french one. My mom hired the electrician so he had to use the dodgy French accent every time he spoke to him.

Our property was recently valued at £1.4M. We've had it since 2005 and the last time we spent any money on it was in 2014. The bathrooms also haven't been updated for 20 years - they're quirky and I fill them with interesting stuff so they're very un-bathroomy. We're not high earners but just bought at the right time in the South East.

I often go in homes that are worth less but have had a lot of money spent on them in more recent years, and the owners clearly have more disposable income than we currently have.

It can sometimes make me feel a tad insecure momentarily as they’ve “got their sh*t together” etc, but never jealousy that would make me not like them. I thought people left that emotion behind in their early 20s!

But I wouldn't assume someone is going to judge my house and therefore not invite them over. Which is my answer to OPs question. And the reason for that is that it wouldn't cross my mind that they might judge, because I don't.

So I have answered OPs question, and given my explanation for my answer.

I disagree
Just because you don’t judge doesn’t mean others don’t

Indirectly, it was OPs question. Would you not invite people in case they judge? No, because I wouldn't imagine they would judge, because I wouldn't.

It’s great that so many don’t judge people on their homes. Well done, you.
However, that wasn’t OP’s question. Clearly, others have been made to feel uncomfortable about their homes either from blatant comments, surprise or that seemingly perfectly nice people turned on them since seeing their home.

Totally get this! The day DH screwed our retractable line exactly where we wanted it, without worrying about if other people might take the washing (there was shared lines in our flats but didn't dare use them) or when we rented a house if the landlord would be mad we'd put something in, was an amazing day.

It's the little things.

I genuinely do not get jealous never have really (except of people whose babies slept at night when dd1 didn’t and I was on my knees). But I am pretty happy with my own circumstances so that may be why.

I can easily comprehend how it’s possible not to envy others, because either by luck of the draw, cultural influence and/or my own privilege, I’m someone that doesn’t ‘do’ or ‘get’ jealousy. I’m happy for people who are happy, and if they have something I would like then I focus on getting it myself, rather than resenting them for having it.

I know ‘flimsy’ reasons can be the truth, but I also know they can be lies. Like I said, the underlying reasons reveal usually reveal themselves over time - when the initial complaint is about the aforementioned faux pas and segues into a rant about snobby rich bitches that are ‘showing off’ by virtue of merely having of doing something, then not even Stevie Wonder is missing that one.

Also a big house is a lot of work so you then need to be rich enough for staff. I admit I was more jealous of the staff yesterday than the house. Imagine someone else doing ALL the cooking / cleaning / shopping gardening? Now that is enviable.

I don't compute it. And this isn't one of those wilfully ignorant: 'but I don't understaaaaaand' protestations that people rightly complain about on this site. I really, genuinely don't.

We are all using anonymous screen handles here. No one on this site has the first clue who the others are.

Who cares about impressing a bunch of fonts?

No of course not, unless you think your visitor will steal your antiques.🤣

DD’s friend is a millionaire, lovely girl and parents. Very down to earth. We have a nice home in a nice area but nowhere near that level of wealth. I don’t think any of her other friends are either, so their world would be very small if they only befriended the wealthy.

Hahahahahahaha. No.

Was at a house yesterday that was quite frankly a palace. It would have been suitable for royalty - I am not exaggerating.

The mum is lovely friendly and warm though was invited in tried not to goggle at the genuine art

We stay in a bog standard 3 bed house.

I've been to a few very nice houses with ds, and while I might envy the beautiful house they have or having more space, I am not jealous and it would not result in any negative feelings at all.

I house is just a small part of people lives and while it might outwardly signify wealth (or a lot of debt), it doesn't automatically mean everything about their life is perfect.

My BIL/SIL took the plunge and bought a very nice house. They are now in trouble with mortgages rates soaring and realising it also costs £40/day to heat it in winter!

Not quite the same, but when we bought our house nearly 30 years ago, the area it is in was a little… faded, populated by those who had purchased in the 1950’s to 1970’s.
As those people passed on, their houses were bought up by people with young families, on medium wages.
In the last few years, house prices in neighbouring areas have escalated to such a degree that those from the “richer” areas are moving into this area, remodelling and extending the post-war housing stock, which is in turn “gentrifying” our area and rendering house prices unreachable to young middle-income families.
This has the “postcode effect” on us: it’s clear that the trades, in particular, think they can add an extra zero onto their prices, so we can’t afford to have a lot of renovation done. Now we feel looked down on by some of the “Flash Harry’s” who’ve moved in!

I prefer neutral ground. No pressure on me nor anyone else.
I'm messy. I don't have the time to tidy adequately enough to entertain smartly though our place is large, and then cook etc and then clean up etc
I never judge another person's home, be it big, shiney, small etc but I do notice and love to compliment a beautiful garden.

Without the humble

I'd love to have this problem 😆

I do worry sometimes but it isn’t a case of thinking the visitor might be jealous, more that they might think I’m a snob or similar. I grew up in a similar house and literally had friends growing up say “you’re so normal and down to earth. I really didn’t think you would be with living where you do’. I usually found it embarrassing as a young person as it was a point of difference at a time when I just wanted to blend in.

Yes, we live in the middle of nowhere and bought a really run down house and did it up. Our brother in law is a gardener so we went to town on the garden then we got a pool table from a free to good home website and all the kids clubbed in to buy a foosball table and a year later an air hockey table. People come in and the comments about being loaded fly about. A few of my friends who live in Dublin regularly comment and then laugh it off when I remind them our mortgage was a third of theirs and we’d never afford to live there.