Are you reluctant to invite people to your house, in case they're jealous ?

We have a big house. I would hate to think that any friends of DD (primary age) or their families were intimidated by it.

I've lived in a teeny tiny cottage and a couple of bog standard 3 beders. When we were living in those I don't think i would have been funny about my older DCs being friends with kids with big houses. They didn't though, so it's hard to do the mental gymnastics to be sure.

I do feel a bit wary dropping my child to a large house / mansion for a playdate and will only do it when I know the families very well. IME most wealthy people have a hands off approach to childcare and have no idea what their kids are doing on their grounds. I much prefer to host playdates.

Not a problem I have - but I do have friends with magnificent houses.
I've never felt jealous, just happy they’re doing well.

I think it depends if their peers were all a lot less well off. It might be the same as a poor person not wanting to show their home to people who they perceive as having bigger/nicer ones.

It's a shame anyone should feel this way.

I certainly do a lot of 'wow' and 'your house is gorgeous' etc if I do visit a fancy home. But I would never be jealous. My gushing might be embarrassing for them maybe, but it's certainly not meant to be. I'm genuinely impressed!

My house is a mess, cluttered and old and broken, so I'm kind of ashamed about it. But real friends simply don't care about stuff like that. They just want to spend time with you.

No definitely not on this position lol but I was a guest at a kids party at a v expensive massive house and some of the comments from other parents were quite shocking, so much bitter jealousy , was really surprised .
One mum though made it clear she felt this was her natural habitat and started speaking like Hyacinth Bucket, it was most intriguing 🤔

No..I fact the opposite. I live in money area and my house is a disgrace. I have been in friends million pound houses and it's made no difference to how I see them. A few close friends have house worth multi millions who are just lovely people. But the only thing I feel if I had invite them in to mine would be shame.

The wealthiest current friend earned her cash, not her dh and I think she is bloody amazing. I love being round her house, it's a warm and happy house because of them. Their company

I wouldn't avoid inviting someone round because of it, but I do feel a bit self conscious and embarrassed, if my guest has it much tougher financially. Particularly because I feel like I don't really deserve it (it's my husband who has been very successful and well renumerated in his career, not me)

Ha, nobody in their right mind would be jealous of our house.

Don't get me wrong, it's not awful, but it's just a bog-standard terrace that needs some upgrades.

I don't live in an amazing house but it's all relative. We are in a comfortable home and have nice stuff.

I did have a friend who would come round and point out all the ways in which her studio flat was inadequate, how she much preferred my home, etc. We shared a hobby and had become friends through that; in our 30s. There was more to it but I stopped being friends with her after a while, it was just weird. I never judged her, her life had gone differently to mine, that's all. In fact I admired her for her independence.

I just notice that prices increase dramatically when people arrive to confirm a telephone quote!

Not a mansion, but a lovely family home.

Name changed for this. Yes sort of. Proper friends or long term friends of my children I don’t mind, because I know they accept us as we are (and to be clear, the house isn’t spectacular, just pretty big.) And messy.

But I am reluctant to have, say, a whole class party (or even a 15-20 kid party) at my house because yes I know that that will make some people in that group see me and my child differently. And yes, I have had a few slightly unpleasant comments.

I have what, if it were ever tidy, could be considered a large insta-worthy house. My friends don’t hate me, mainly because they’re friends, but also because they know how much blood, sweat and tears have gone into making it the family home that it is. They know the trials and tribulations we have gone through as a family, in that house. They know there is always a shoulder to cry on, a bed to sleep in and booze to drink. They know it’s party central and a place to get away to for some semblance of peace. The same applies to my kids friends.

I remember when my son was little he had a friend over for tea. During the meal the friend said “my mum said I wasn’t to say anything about our house being much bigger than yours” 🤣

Nobody would be jealous of my house, so I don’t have that problem.
I’ve never felt jealous walking into someone else’s house who have more than me either.
I’m not even slightly materialistic though, so none of that appeals to me anyway.

Unfortunately yes. I have lost a pair of friends from uni over it. We used to meet up once a year for a catch up and I would drive us to Alton towers or similar. I quickly learned to underplay how well I was doing. At one point my husband and I owned three houses between us (unusual, short term circumstances and all mortgaged etc) and I couldn't tell them or let them stay with me because they were still living the student life of drugs and music festivals and lived in tiny studio apartments. The friendships fizzeled out eventually. Just completely different life stages. At 25-27years old.

Eh no, I can't say that has ever been a problem for me.

My DM was (and still is) very into property/ houses. Parents weren’t wealthy (normal middle class type income level) but we grew up in a huge house and as a young teen I was occasionally surprised by new friends’ comments on it. I don’t know if my parents’ friends thought anything of it though.

A measure of a person is not what they keep, it's what they give.

I couldn't give a shit if someone's got a £5m worth of art on a wall, if they act like their better than others because they bought something... They can get to fuck.

But no, I dont avoid inviting people around because they might be jealous .. I do t invite people around because I hate people .. and I'm a cunt.. so. It works well.

Err no. Sort of the opposite, I live in a nice house but worth that people will think it’s a mess (because it is most of the time). I’m always jealous of small houses where everything is neat and tidy.

I used to feel like this when I was a kid about inviting people to my parents house, embarrassed because it was so nice and big

Now I live in a small house and I'm worried I'll be judged for other stuff

Love this...a place to relax in...

No. Friends don't judge and accept you for what you are. Mind you I don't have a posh place but have friends with vvvv posh places...I'm not jealous..why would I. They a friend. one friend who you think is posh is being abused by her husband (financially mostly but it's becoming emotional) so I'm just an ear to her at the moment with suggestions of where she go for help...her house like something you see on a magazine. I'm not jealous just concerned.

I know people are jealous of my carpet.... the crushed Ella K puff pattern with banana accent has caused many hatred side eyes...

No, but then again I don't invite riff raff.

Humble bragging, but it was 20 years ago. We lived in an amazingly house, overlooking the sea and built on stilts. Friends thought we had a flat in it. However it was a short term company let so easy to enjoy and not feel braggy.
More recently I’ve bought a breathtaking house, however it needs a lot of work done on it, it’s too isolated to bring up children in it and had been on the market for 18 months. I probably over explain every time I mention it host.