Should my 10 year old be preparing his own meals?

I have a 10yo.
He cleans his room.
I do laundry, he folds and puts away.
He washes himself, and does teeth, and takes care of his invisalign.
He cooks simple meals - can fry an egg, and similar. Brings me coffee in the morning.
He walks and feeds the dogs.
Walks to and from his acitvities.

Mine can make himself breakfast or a sandwich, use the microwave, toaster etc. Doesn't use the oven or hob unsupervised. I say "can" because 8/10 he will still ask me to do it for him.

His chores include tidying and hoovering his own bedroom, clearing his plates, tidying his own mess etc and anything adhoc I ask him to do things like the recycling, popping to the shop for me, tidying up, putting away laundry, sorting laundry in to categories for the wash. He sometimes does dishes but makes so much mess but I think he should be doing it really.

My dd has recently turned 11, she tidies her room, puts her laundry away (I put in on her bed), showers herself, does her own hair, gets herself dressed in whatever she wants to wear etc

I do wake her up in the morning and do her meals but from September she'll be responsible for getting herself up and doing her own breakfast and then walking to school alone.

My 11 year old makes her lunch (packed lunch for school), tidies her bedroom, packs up her own stuff for activities. I support her to do this. She can’t do her own hair - it’s too long. She can cook a meal but we cook a family dinner. She can make her own bits for snacks if she needs.

Start small? Could he have a shower himself? Could you help him prepare the night before for the next day: teach him to brush his hair.

When I was ten I had to do chores to earn my pocket money (and learn life skills along the way). I had to:

• Get myself up, washed and dressed in the morning, including my hair
• Get my own clothes ready the night before I needed to wear them
• Make sure that my dirty clothes were in the laundry basket once worn
• Help make tea on a Friday night (e.g. peel the potatoes)
• Hoover the downstairs on a Saturday morning
• Do the drying up after tea during the week
• Feed the cats their breakfast and dinner at the weekend

Also I had to keep my own room tidy, that wasn't attached to my pocket money, it was something my mum insisted on. In fact I would get told off if I didn't because it made it more difficult for her to clean in there, also no one wants a messy house do they.

I seem to remember also washing the car once in a while, but I am fairly sure there was a pocket money top up for that - probably 50p or something!

Wouldn't it make more sense to get him to do all the basics first?

I wouldn’t expect him to make all his own meals. I’d expect him to make his own breakfast though and at least help with lin b and tea sometimes. Do you eat tea separately? I’d start with a couple of chores to get him used to it, then increase it when he’s doing them consistently and properly without you having to remind him all the time. Otherwise I suspect it’ll all be too much too quickly and he won’t do any of it.

I might involve him in cooking and food prep but as a fun activity and teaching him rather than expecting him to actually sort his own dinner out. He's probably a bit young for that.

I'm sure he can tidy his room a bit though

Why have you plumped for making his own meals when he doesn't tidy his own room?

Meals is a weird one to pick. Surely you eat together.

He can wash himself and keep his room tidy.

My dd12 doesn't prepare her own meals, usually just due to time constraints. She is responsible for tidying her room, cleaning the bathroom once per week and helping me do a clean on a weekend (for about 30mins).

The baths and hair he should be doing himself, for sure.
Meals? Hardly. Don’t you eat as a family anyway?