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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that time losing sun *is* a good reason?

52 replies

PaddingtonTheAngelofDeath · 17/05/2024 19:47

We are looking to move, it is for 'wants' rather than 'needs'.

My parents have suggested that they buy our smaller house, and we theirs, financially it would make sense for both and it has everything we are looking for, except;

the sun is gone from their garden by 18.30-40 this time of year, my garden keeps the sun until it sets.

No one else in my household really cares (dd a little) but I don't want to move somewhere where I can't sit in the garden in the sun. I sit out every possible night, I am sat now writing this with the sun still uninterrupted.

I don't get home until 6-6.15 and I work indoors with only artificial light, I'm not fussed about anything else, I am happy to move as the only thing I love is the garden but equally I am happy here.

DH says IABU but he gets all he wants (double garage, workshop, office and gym) whereas I lose the only think I want.

OP posts:
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Original poster
PaddingtonTheAngelofDeath · 18/05/2024 22:04

OmuraWhale · 18/05/2024 19:40

If this really is your greatest pleasure then you are right not to compromise OP.

It really is. I'm sat outside now, it is 10pm after a fairly rubbish weather day and this is my view. The sunsets in the middle.

To think that time losing sun *is* a good reason?
OP posts:
OmuraWhale · 18/05/2024 19:40

If this really is your greatest pleasure then you are right not to compromise OP.

Original poster
PaddingtonTheAngelofDeath · 18/05/2024 19:36

Thanks all. I'm currently sat in fleeting sun, but when it comes out from the clouds it is glorious.

To those saying we don't have much sun, I sit out as much as I can , we have a awning that goes up when it rains in the summer and but in the winter if the sun is out I still sit out wrapped up.

I'm glad I've posted it has cemented that it is a valid reason, I've asked what DH doesn't want to compromise on (workshop) and told him I wouldn't make him compromise on that, think he gets it a bit more. It is my greatest pleasure.

OP posts:
CampervanKween · 18/05/2024 18:26

Me too. Sat in it now watching ds3 (play with the hose) water the pots.

Kalevala · 18/05/2024 18:09

Wearegoingtoneedabiggerboat · 18/05/2024 13:55

What is this sun that you talk about.

I've spent most of the day in the sun.

Wearegoingtoneedabiggerboat · 18/05/2024 13:55

What is this sun that you talk about.

StripyHorse · 18/05/2024 13:28

YANBU OP. We have a North East facing garden so we just have a small patch of sun in the evening which goes about 19:00 this time of year. We have sun in the front garden but cannot bring ourselves to sit out in the front.

We are currently starting to look at moving house, and not being able to sit out in the late afternoon / evening would be a deal breaker for me. Thankfully DH is on the same page.

Borborygmus · 18/05/2024 13:12

I've lived in the same house for 28 years now, and I have absolutely no idea what time the garden loses the sun, I've never noticed!

Usernameisnotavailable0 · 18/05/2024 13:03

YouveGotAFastCar · 17/05/2024 20:13

We moved from somewhere that lost the sun around 7pm to a house that usually has it until it goes down two years ago. I love it. I am sat out here now, after doing bedtime, it’s beautiful.

I would not give it up.

We were in the same position, and it was our only reason for moving.

People thought we were nuts, but it makes a huge difference on how we live.

Goldshelfie · 18/05/2024 12:44

My garden is south west facing and gets sun almost all day but then at 6pm at the latest the sun disappears behind some massive trees that are in the grounds of another large property. That’s the height of summer, 6pm and it’s gone. I really hate it as well, because it’s not a hot climate then when the sun goes then it’s too chilly to sit out and eat in the evening. If I moved that would be a factor and also a dealbreaker in a next house.

Kalevala · 18/05/2024 12:39

TheTripThatWasnt · 18/05/2024 11:47

Enough to make it worthwhile! Not being able to sit out and feel the sun on my face would be very depressing. It's precisely the fact that we have long grey winters that having a sunny garden in the spring/summer is important (to me).

Show quote history

Same! I'm outside and barefoot for as much of the year as is possible. I wouldn't want a dark, cool garden in the UK.

Kalevala · 18/05/2024 12:37

KnickerlessParsons · 18/05/2024 09:54

How many days in the year do we actually get enough sun for you to sit out in the garden?
It is nice to sit out in the evenings, but in this country we spend a lot more time inside than outside.

May to September if it isn't raining

Topsy44 · 18/05/2024 12:26

I think if having sun in the garden in the evening is important to you then stick to your guns. Your needs are just as valid as your DHs.

WaltzingWaters · 18/05/2024 12:06

completely understand. I love a glass of wine or pimms in the garden on a sunny evening!

Withswitch · 18/05/2024 12:05

Can we swap? My garden gets full sun all day. I hate it!

mountaingoatsarehairy · 18/05/2024 12:02

I am with you OP. Just say no.

we have a sun trap garden and I will never move.

in fact we bought it 100% because of the evening sun

Mumsgirls · 18/05/2024 11:55

I bought my home in the winter and went and sat outside with a compass before I would even view. Would have compromised on anything but a sunny garden. I live outside in summer, even angle my tv so I can sit out watching sports events. Also have a large parasol for those who need it. Don’t compromise, you will regret it every sunny evening and it’s such a boon for mental health.

TheTripThatWasnt · 18/05/2024 11:47

KnickerlessParsons · 18/05/2024 09:54

How many days in the year do we actually get enough sun for you to sit out in the garden?
It is nice to sit out in the evenings, but in this country we spend a lot more time inside than outside.

Enough to make it worthwhile! Not being able to sit out and feel the sun on my face would be very depressing. It's precisely the fact that we have long grey winters that having a sunny garden in the spring/summer is important (to me).

theholesinmyapologies · 18/05/2024 11:37

Your happiness has to be part of the equation, too, OP. And if you require sunshine, then you need a garden that gets sunshine when you're there to enjoy it.

YANBU

MissScarletInTheBallroom · 18/05/2024 10:39

PaddingtonTheAngelofDeath · 17/05/2024 21:44

Sorry for not being clear. Sun is def there but not in the garden in the evening. Garden is south facing but the ground behind rises quite steeply and with trees the sun is lost behind it.
The front garden is in shadow even earlier because of the house.
For my DH and his family and all his friends it isn't a problem, it is a lovely garden a lovely house.

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Your DH's family and friends aren't going to live there so they don't get a vote.

It doesn't really matter what your reason is, if you don't want to live there your DH needs to accept that and you need to look for somewhere you are both happy with.

awesomeaardvark · 18/05/2024 10:36

Speak to an architect and see if it's possible to add a roof terrace in a way that would provide more light?

Ticktapticktap · 18/05/2024 10:29

If sitting in the evening sun in your garden is a major source of your life's enjoyment, don't give it up because other people who get enjoyment from different think it's not important.

Abitorangelooking · 18/05/2024 10:13

If it’s the ground behind that’s the problem could you add a raised deck so you have somewhere sunny. Victorian houses generally quite tall and Sun must be hitting it somewhere.

PuttingDownRoots · 18/05/2024 10:03

On paper it sounds silly.

However I think the lack of natural light in our house at the time contributed to my depression a few years ago. There were other factors, but that hpuse had wierd effect on me

KnickerlessParsons · 18/05/2024 09:54

How many days in the year do we actually get enough sun for you to sit out in the garden?
It is nice to sit out in the evenings, but in this country we spend a lot more time inside than outside.

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