To think everyone has some mean girl in them?

Jeez, it’s not nitpicking or sneering to think someone looks bad in an outfit.

Of course you wouldn't but if you were a secure, happy person you wouldn't need to nitpick and sneer at others.
Terrible habit.
You can deny it all you like but ask any counsellor or psychologist

I would say yes. I tend not to say it but God I'm thinking it. It's Friday so here's a meme.

I'm not sure that's what a "mean girl" is tbh.

Absolutely accept this makes me judgy but definitely don’t accept it’s all about my self esteem.

Would absolutely think the same about men with a horrible outfit/ nasty tattoos / beer gut

Nope. It’s just an unappealing sight, same as decor or artwork I don’t like. Not comparing them to me, just don’t like the way it looks.

Because you are comparing them to you unconsciously.
It's a terrible misogynistic habit as its mostly done about women.
Too big, too thin, unflattering, not good enough,look terrible
By your standards which makes it your problem

It's not, I agree. It's just an observation. If you acted upon it and said something horrible then that would be different.

Looking at other people and thinking they look terrible,overweight,ugly is a reflection of your own self esteem and your feelings about yourself.

Eh?

If I see someone and think they are wearing a really unflattering outfit and look terrible, how is that a reflection of my feelings about myself?

We wouldn't be human if we didn't have those thoughts at times.
I'm sure the nicest, calmest people even do. People will and do annoy us.

Yes realised I had posted in the wrong place after posting it and can't figure out how to delete it!

I think your question needs a thread of its own, I am sure people will be happy to discuss!

Totally agree with this.
Looking at other people and thinking they look terrible,overweight,ugly is a reflection of your own self esteem and your feelings about yourself.
Mean girls/ Bullies actually hate themselves but it's unbearable so they dump it onto others,usually people they are jealous of or people who are different.

There are people I dislike but I give them little of my time or energy, polite if absolutely necessary but I barely think about them let alone think mean things about them.

Everyone can be judgemental or unkind.
Honestly I think this behaviour is worsened by a persons unhappiness or insecurities.

If I find myself thinking in unkind terms I honestly know somethings up with me.

WWYD
My DD (9) is having a birthday party soon. There is one girl at school she spends a lot of time with, not always entirely out of choice. After some discussion she did invite her but they seem to have had arguments everyday since. DD has come out of school every day this week asking me to uninvite her and say we got the numbers wrong and there isn't enough spaces. She thinks she will cause an argument and ruin her party. I don't feel uninviting her will work and isn't very kind but also don't want DD to have her birthday party ruined or be stressed out about it for the whole run up to it.
So WWYD??

actually contrary to PP I think there can be mean thoughts

Wishing someone harm or enjoying someone’s misfortune is mean - even if you don’t say it out loud

But thinking someone’s outfit is awful is neither of those and is not mean

I don't agree tbh.

I think the vast majority of women have it in them to be a mean girl, but not everyone chooses that option. It’s possible to have the bitch streak but decide not to use it.

I think mean thoughts all the time!! But I never say them. It's just your inner dialogue and we're all human.

Did you ever see that episode of Sabrina the Teenage Witch where she changed Libby into a nerd and instead of learning a lesson, Libby was just as bullying and superior as before, just now towards the cheerleaders and "in crowd"? And the other nerds went along with it? She realised Libby didn't actually care what group she was in, she just wanted to exclude people.

It sounds silly but it was a massive revelation for me because I was in the nerdy crowd and I suddenly realised that as a group, we weren't actually any nicer or deeper than the people to whom we felt so superior. I'm not saying all of us were horrible but the fact that we weren't very fashionable didn't make us better.

Mean girls are absolutely prevalent, that’s for sure; as evidenced by what sometimes happens in this forum.

Yeh I do this. I can't stand it when people are just mean and say unkind things to someones face or behind their backs, but I certainly think things sometimes!! I think as long as you don't say it then it's just human nature. The difference is not having the intent to hurt someone else's feelings, or just not caring about their feelings.

Not everyone has some mean girl in them. People have opinions and different tastes etc so I may think I don’t like someone’s skirt, that doesn’t make me a mean girl it means me and the skirt wearer have different tastes. It’s what you do with the thoughts or opinions that would define if you were a mean girl or not

I suppose it depends on your threshold for ‘mean’.

To me, being mean involves taking enjoyment from others’ misfortune, judging them and having feelings of contempt towards them.

I might think that somebody I meet looks terrible, but it wouldn’t bring any sort of emotional response from me, I wouldn’t gain any pleasure or superiority, or feel contempt towards them, so I don’t think that counts as “mean”.

The only times I feel “meanly’ towards others is if I dislike them, usually because they have behaved badly towards me or others I care about, but I think this is probably quite normal and not a “mean girl” trait.

To be a mean girl I think you need to think nasty thoughts about perfectly harmless people. I’m not like that and I hope most aren’t either.

Anyone who does think that way has a self-esteem problem imo.