To think that men get a ridiculously bad rap on this site?

I agree too. Especially as I get older, I look at my friends, and at my mum and all her friends - there is a specific way that women support each other on their life journeys which is incredibly precious. I would never want to be without my truest friends.

OP I'm sorry that you feel hurt and upset. If you wanted to find support you could do so here; if not I hope you find it irl.

One I’ve come across have been the type who want, or demand that other women have to pick up the slack - for example : if a woman has a useless male partner, all of sudden she remembers this ’sisterhood’ and want other women (always women, never men) to help her, for free.
While simultaneously tear other women down who might be different from her - if there’s other woman who doesn’t want/have kids, she’s shelfish, living easy life, couldn’t need help herself sometimes.

Then there’s the queen bee types who want to rule every woman.
How automatically we all have to have pretty much the same opinion, toe the line, or we have ’internalized misogyny’.

And from what I’ve seen, these women lead a very conventional life (nothing wrong with that in and off itself) but it seems to mean that it’s rest of the women job to put them on pedastal and pander to them.

5128gap also gave a great example.

These ’sisterhood’ women are only thinking what they can get from women.
And weaponize it.

And personally I don’t trust anyone who tries to push artificial familiarity.

I know this got very long already, but I just want to say that anyone who just helps and supports others is amazing.
Nothing wrong with that, obviously.
And they are very much needed.
It’s just this ’sisterhood’ that gives me heebie-jeebies, the way I’ve seen it being used.
I have nothing againts women choosing themselves to help and support other women.
But these women don’t go around demanding ’sisterhood’.

Oh dear OP, it looks like you're the one generalising now. No, I don't know any women like this at all, I don't recognise this picture that you're creating. I know women who have lifted me up when I have been at rock bottom at the hands of men, I have had support, guidance and wisdom of women to help raise my wonderful children and be my biggest cheerleaders. This is sisterhood and damn right I believe in it and practice it everyday in repaying what was given and is still given to me.

I'm not the PP, but as someone who agrees with her, I think of it like this: women who talk a lot about 'sisterhood' often are quite self aggrandising and performative. They say crap like 'queens fix each others' crowns and similar platitudes, and are always talking about 'lifting each other up'. IME, these women are the very first to sack off other women as soon as a man shows up, throw other women under the bus, and generally make it all about themselves.

//

Literally the first post after the one you referred to have contained a really healthy example of what many of us refer to as the sisterhood, not sure why you would bypass that?

Much cherry picking going on ..:

Agree whole heartedly.

It's sad that this thread was seemingly started in defence of men, but appears to have an 'all women are bitches' narrative at the core.

They are framing it in a very superficial simplistic way, as the imposing of obligations on women by other women - 'don't steal my man' kind of thing. They are overlooking the women who see it as something they offer other women, not merely take from them. Which is actually quite telling about their own characters.

@FindThatThing "Do grown-up’s actually believe in ’sisterhood’ though?

Is this an actual thing?
I ask, because I’ve only seen this online, and going by that, anyone who in real life try to push some ’sisterhood’ on me would be a red flag.

(Sorry, but women who have insist this consept have seem entitled and selfish, only thinking about themselves)"

I don't believe in the sisterhood. But could you explain why those who do are entitled and selfish? I don't see the connection?

All I know is that when women are at their lowest ebb, when they've been raped, abused and violated, its other women who pick them up. And at the less extreme end of things, when they're struggling for childcare, or need support or comfort with no strings or expectations they'll repay it with intimacy, or when they need care in old age, it's women the majority find it from. Campaigning for better rights, greater safety for women..guess who?
If you want to off set that against those women who can be unpleasant or competitive towards you, or a minority who do appalling things, that's your perogative of course. But whatever term you use for it, there is great value in what women provide and offer each other. And anyone who thinks otherwise, is clearly priveleged not to have needed 'the sisterhood' in their own lives so far.

Do grown-up’s actually believe in ’sisterhood’ though?

Is this an actual thing?
I ask, because I’ve only seen this online, and going by that, anyone who in real life try to push some ’sisterhood’ on me would be a red flag.

(Sorry, but women who have insist this consept have seem entitled and selfish, only thinking about themselves)

I think I didn't realise how awful my relationship is until I posted on here. I just bumbled along thinking lots of people are in a similar set up to me, so it was very helpful hearing from women who have decent, kind and helpful partners & realising this isn't normal. Happy people aren't generally on forums looking for advice so there is less representation for decent men.

OP it sounds like you've been abused and let down by the woman in your life and many people receive support when they share these experiences on here. That's not the same as minimising the impact of men's nehaviour on woman, they are two different things. Perhaps post a thread about the thing you really want/need to talk about.

OP: Starts thread bitching about what other people post on MN

and later whilst getting their arse handed to them:

OP: I will post what I fucking well like and YOU should be embarrassed trying to censor what I post

😂jfc

No, no one would say that, you are projecting. There are posts on here which detail abuse from mothers or friends and no one tells them that they are a statistical anomaly at all.

Women have been beaten, tortured and abused by men and are sharing their stories, who are you to tell them their stories are not valid and the poor menfolk. I know plenty of men who abuse or enable the abuse so my experience is very different to yours, that's life. You know plenty of men who are great - good for you.

To be honest, I don't particularly care if men get bashing on here - I could quite easily slide into misandry if it wasn't for my son who is lovely. And I couldn't care less, perhaps if most men I know/hear about met all the wonderful men you know they would stop being shit.

"Why not try though? Rather than prioritising men and their feelings. That won't make your experiences ,possible trauma and feelings any better. Prioritise yourself, and you might actually find some sympathy and solidarity. Rather than fighting and arguing on the behalf of random men that neither care or are aware of how MN feels about them or that you're defending them."

This 💯%. Championing random men on Mumsnet. And then getting aggressive when challenged.

If I made a post based on what I have been through with some women, I would probably not be allowed to post it.

Of course you would.

Are you really calling the many, many posts with women's personal experience of abusive or just generally shit men, and the reference to factual statistics about inequality in domestic and caring load, plus referring to stats about sexual offending rates in men 'a bizarre generalisation'? What's bizarre about it?

Nobody ever says that all men are like that, so why the need for these NAMALT threads?

If I made a post based on what I have been through with some women, I would probably not be allowed to post it. I would be told that my abuse at the hands of a woman was a statistical anomaly so not worth posting about. Never mind NAMALT, I would be told 'almost no women are like that'. So I will post what I fucking well like and YOU should be embarrassed trying to censor what I post!

Why not try though? Rather than prioritising men and their feelings. That won't make your experiences ,possible trauma and feelings any better. Prioritise yourself, and you might actually find some sympathy and solidarity. Rather than fighting and arguing on the behalf of random men that neither care or are aware of how MN feels about them or that you're defending them.

And goady.

Gosh. So aggressive.

@Hateam and that the do
Inane prevailing view on MN, is it?

@Hateam The OP in that example you have given goes on to say she used that title for traffic and dramatic effect.