Page 2 | Is 'pearl-clutching' the best you can do?

VestibuleVirgin · 2024-05-17T04:27:01+00:00

This seems to be the perjorative phrase du jour here. Just because someone disagrees with a view, or raises a concern, or who presents a considered, unselfish opinion, they are equated to what most posters here seem to believe is a failydail reader who is assumed to be a country-based, retired colonel's wife, who wears sensible shoes, and a twin-set and pearls combo, and who has the vapours at the way society is going? A middle-class version of a 'Karen'

Disturbia81 · 17/05/2024 09:42

Engaea · 17/05/2024 05:30

Yep it's a pathetic way of shutting people down, I get very tired of it. Super misogynistic too.

Yes I've had it said to me a few times when questioning something grim about men. Just trying to shut my opinion down.

Beefcurtains79 · 17/05/2024 09:25

‘FailyDail’. Jesus, the cringe.

pointythings · 17/05/2024 08:28

I always thought that the term was more or less reserved for people who are prudish and old fashioned to an extreme degree, not for general disagreement? An example would be the kind of people who come to AIBU periodically to tell us we shouldn't swear so much because it isn't ladylike. I've only ever used it in that sort of context and yes, I've used it to describe men that way too. My late husband included when he was being very silly about the (mid teen) kids occasionally saying 'fuck'.

EdithStourton · 17/05/2024 08:25

Sugarcoatedalmonds · 17/05/2024 06:05

Sorry I disagree. It's a great description of someone who is old fashioned in their beliefs.

This failydail reader who is assumed to be a country-based, retired colonel's wife, who wears sensible shoes, and a twin-set and pearls combo, and who has the vapours at the way society is going? This is exactly who i picture too, so also a very apt description!

It is well known that if you live in the countryside you are as thick as mince and hold attitudes that came out of the ark.

(For the avoidance of doubt, that was sarcasm.)

Edited to add, living in the country conduces to the wearing of sensible shoes. I have an ex-Londoner neighbour who says she never wears most of her shoes these days (as she stands there in lace-ups).

thanKyouaIMee · 17/05/2024 08:21

I dislike "pearl clutchers" and "cool wives" etc - it is just a way to shut conversations down without appreciating other opinions.

EmilyTjP · 17/05/2024 08:18

There’s lots of phrases used on here to silence people from both sides of the argument.

MrsDanversGlidesAgain · 17/05/2024 08:15

Sorry I disagree. It's a great description of someone who is old fashioned in their beliefs

What is 'old fashioned in their beliefs'? Can you give me a defintion of that and why it merits being called a pearl clutcher?

TigathaChristie · 17/05/2024 08:12

Couldn't agree more OP - it's a lazy misogynistic put down aimed at women who don't want sex and violence to be shoehorned into every sodding thing, particularly in the mainstream media.

As an aside, what the hell is wrong with being the wife of a retired colonel who lives in the country and wears sensible shoes. I guess she doesn't deserve respect?

I am a middle-aged middle-class woman who lives in the country and wears sensible shoes. On occasion I wear my late grandmother's beautiful pearls. I therefore assume that I am an irrelevant laughing stock!

pictoosh · 17/05/2024 07:54

First time I heard the expression on here I laughed at the vision it created in my mind's eye...not necessarily an outfit but an action. I'd say it to a man.
I still like it.

Mrsjayy · 17/05/2024 07:50

You call non swearers "Karen" are you not very bright ?

Original poster

VestibuleVirgin · 17/05/2024 07:49

BibbleandSqwauk · 17/05/2024 07:14

Sorry, read and posted in haste and my loathing of "Karen" tends to make me jump on that. The pearl clutching thing I get as a phrase is perhaps not dissimilar in that it does conjure an inaccurate stereotype but is a social media shorthand for saying uptight, fretting over small or unimportant issues like non organic hummus being served. And yes I suppose it is similarly female based but I wonder if there are similar tropes on male forums?

I do that too, so understand! Certain words bring down a red mist!
Non-organic hummus! Perfect example
Have a good, whatever you are up to today!

OP posts:

Doingthework · 17/05/2024 07:32

@VestibuleVirgin

I think you’ve nailed it A pearl clutches is a gender based insult aimed at a specific group and is no different to A Karen . I would imagine it’s gender opposite is a Gammon in that it probably targets the same social class and age.

That being said I did used to find it amusing on her when an Op would post something sex related and then state. “ clutches pearls” but I won’t be using it anymore.

Thanks

BibbleandSqwauk · 17/05/2024 07:14

Sorry, read and posted in haste and my loathing of "Karen" tends to make me jump on that. The pearl clutching thing I get as a phrase is perhaps not dissimilar in that it does conjure an inaccurate stereotype but is a social media shorthand for saying uptight, fretting over small or unimportant issues like non organic hummus being served. And yes I suppose it is similarly female based but I wonder if there are similar tropes on male forums?

Original poster

VestibuleVirgin · 17/05/2024 07:08

fernsandlilies · 17/05/2024 06:49

Surely the whole point of the OP mentioning’Karen’ was to say that ‘pearl-clutching’ is misogynistic and dismissive in a similar way?

Thank you for understanding the point rather jumping to a conclusion based on the reading of one word in an entire post!
🙂

OP posts:

Marjoriefrobisher · 17/05/2024 07:05

Sugarcoatedalmonds · 17/05/2024 06:05

Sorry I disagree. It's a great description of someone who is old fashioned in their beliefs.

This failydail reader who is assumed to be a country-based, retired colonel's wife, who wears sensible shoes, and a twin-set and pearls combo, and who has the vapours at the way society is going? This is exactly who i picture too, so also a very apt description!

This person lives mainly in a certain type of person’s head. But so what. Lazy, unimaginative people use lazy unimaginative cliches. Nowt new there.

Original poster

VestibuleVirgin · 17/05/2024 07:03

ChockysChimichanga · 17/05/2024 06:25

YABU for using the phrase ‘karen’.

See previously reply. Why is describing someone as a pearl-clutcher any less offensive?

OP posts:

Oneearringlost · 17/05/2024 06:59

Oh, C'mon, Shep!

RampantIvy · 17/05/2024 06:57

HappiestSleeping · 17/05/2024 06:25

Here's one I made earlier 🤣

Show quote history

Mine is covered in sticky backed plastic

I hate the term pearl clutcher as well. It is usually used by posters justifying their own bad behaviour.

I'm assuming this is related to another ongoing thread.

Original poster

VestibuleVirgin · 17/05/2024 06:55

BibbleandSqwauk · 17/05/2024 06:28

You lost me at "Karen".

But that was the point, @BibbleandSqwauk . Pearl-clutching is as muuch a pop/insult at the 'stereo-typical middle-class' as much as a 'Karen' is 'stereo-typical' lower.

Yet it is widely used and accepted on here

OP posts:

Beefcurtains79 · 17/05/2024 06:54

Yes, I’ve noticed it’s used a lot towards posters who are worried about child safeguarding a lot. It’s a way of trying to shame posters by calling them ‘uptight’ basically.

Busbygirl · 17/05/2024 06:53

It’s ageist. Something MN is very good at.

SpringerFall · 17/05/2024 06:52

It is the new gaslighting

DramaLlamaBangBang · 17/05/2024 06:51

'Oi dickhead' is aimed at one dickhead. ' pearl clutchers' etc and ' won't anyone think ofvthe children?' mockingly said is aimed at an entire group of people ( mostly women) who disagree with whoever is saying it. I presume this is a TAAT about the Eurovision song, becsuse people thought simulating a stereotype of gay men cottaging on Eurovision was inappropriate. Presumably the entire global audience of Eurovision (a high proportion of whom are gay) are all Pearl clutches too since he was the only performer to get no points from the audience vote.

fernsandlilies · 17/05/2024 06:49

Surely the whole point of the OP mentioning’Karen’ was to say that ‘pearl-clutching’ is misogynistic and dismissive in a similar way?

KrisAkabusi · 17/05/2024 06:44

"Notice how these types of phrases are all aimed at women."

Oi, dickhead!