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AIBU?

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Sending your unwell wife downstairs

167 replies

Navymamma · 17/05/2024 01:21

I’ve got a nasty, persistent cough. It’s annoying but I’m unwell. DH is getting audibly annoyed because my cough is keeping him awake. He suggested I put on some Vicks or try sleeping upright. I told him there was no point because I know from experience it doesn’t make a difference. He testily said fine then, do nothing. He’s been so passive aggressive about it, so I said, I’ll just go sleep on the sofa then. He pointed out that I wont be comfortable. I said, well of course I wont be comfortable but it’s obvious you’re annoyed about my cough. He said nothing. I’m now on the sofa uncomfortable while he sleeps upstairs.
AIBU to think a man shouldn’t have his unwell wife sleeping on the sofa so that he can sleep uninterrupted?

OP posts:
PercyPeg · 18/05/2024 20:04

Dillydollydingdong · 18/05/2024 20:00

Haven't you got a spare bedroom?

Some people live in bedsits, let alone a spare room.

Dillydollydingdong · 18/05/2024 20:00

Haven't you got a spare bedroom?

mandlerparr · 18/05/2024 18:03

lol, you sent yourself to the couch.

drusth · 18/05/2024 11:13

tends to rub me up the wrong way when I’m unwell as I’m unfailingly sympathetic when he’s unwell.

In that case treat him how he treats you when he’s sick. Don’t make any more effort than he makes for you.

bloodyplumbing · 18/05/2024 11:09

He didn't send you anywhere!

I'm sure you could've seen a GP in sone form in all this time

Looneytune253 · 18/05/2024 10:59

No absolutely not, your poor DH. You're unwell and grouchy obv (and he will be tired and grouchy too) but you basically sent yourself downstairs. He didn't loudly protest but he still said not to. You've defo brought that on yourself. Please rest in bed today and get yourself well but try not to take it out on him

MrsSkylerWhite · 18/05/2024 10:56

You may need prednisone tablets. You really need to see your GP.

mrsdineen2 · 18/05/2024 08:41

Haven't rtft, so I'm probably the 49th person to say it, but he didn't send you, you flounced.

Yabu

Whowhatwherewhenwhy1 · 18/05/2024 08:40

Ear plugs. Silicone ones. Always have some in the medical box for just such situations. Easy fix avoids sulking and sleepless nights.

TheCadoganArms · 17/05/2024 21:34

Toomuchgoingon79 · 17/05/2024 11:21

In our house the coughing person would go downstairs as they'll be up anyway coughing pointless both being tired

Same here. The sick person in our household buggers off to the spare room and leaves the other person to actually sleep.

brunettemic · 17/05/2024 21:02

Navymamma · 17/05/2024 01:26

He didn’t tell me not to, he said “you’ll be uncomfortable” and fuck all else after that!

Get a grip, you’ve invented this problem. He gave you alternatives and you didn’t like them, then told you not to do something but you did it anyway. Then you made your post header a flat out lie to try and garner MN support against your DH.

Unforgettablefire · 17/05/2024 20:44

Theothername · 17/05/2024 09:48

In my house the sick person gets the bed and the one who needs more sleep goes downstairs. And we both make big sad eyes at each other as though we’ll never be together again.

Big sad eyes 😂😂😂😂

EnglishBluebell · 17/05/2024 20:16

Sitting upright DOES help with a cough.

StarbucksQueen1 · 17/05/2024 18:44

Doesn’t sound like you’re that unwell you can’t handle sleeping on the sofa! Someone else’s cough is bloody annoying! My husband used to get a horrific cough whenever he was poorly, an inhaler sorted him out. Maybe see a Dr.

Concretejungle1 · 17/05/2024 18:42

ibuprofen is not recommended to asthmatics. It can worsen the symptoms.
ive had to use once as a one off even then a very low dose.

Concretejungle1 · 17/05/2024 18:41

ibuprofen is not recommended to asthmatics. It can worsen the symptoms.
ive had to use once as a one off even then a very low dose.

TiptoeThroughTheToadstools · 17/05/2024 18:30

It sounds like you're having a tiny tantrum

rwalker · 17/05/2024 18:29

I’d go and sleep downstairs if i was coughing and wife does the same

StormingNorman · 17/05/2024 18:22

I would have let you get on with being uncomfortable downstairs too.

Sounds like you got your knickers in a right twist.

gannett · 17/05/2024 18:21

I don't think either of you would have been at your best in that situation. It's crap being kept awake by coughing and it's even more crap to have the cough. I would have just slept separately in the first place to avoid this very predictable annoyance.

Boomer55 · 17/05/2024 18:12

Not sure what you thought he could do. Coughs are annoying to others.🤷‍♀️

Merryoldgoat · 17/05/2024 18:05

Plus a lot of coughing with asthma might indicate your medication needs a review.

Merryoldgoat · 17/05/2024 18:03

Navymamma · 17/05/2024 11:23

I do usually see a GP I’m just not impressed by mine and haven’t yet seen him.

I can’t take codeine and I’m asthmatic, but the GP suggests ibuprofen to reduce inflammation.

Can the ibuprofen and talk to a pharmacist.

I had a bad cough and was taking brufen for my knee and pharmacist said to stop as it was likely making it worse. Cough stopped very quickly.

And change your doctor.

rebus · 17/05/2024 17:58

Would your husband be open to alternating nights on the sofa until your cough has improved?

Laurama91 · 17/05/2024 15:17

Me and my partner sleep downstairs if ill. It's not fair on the other to not be able to sleep and have to go to work.