FIL 'took' Our car!

Even if tax and insurance cost them £250 for the month, assuming they sell the car on again for £1500, they’re only £250 out of pocket. This is definitely cheaper than hiring a car for a month.

However, as this is only possible because of help from FIL & BIL, OP and her DH are being very unreasonable.

You all sound like twats.

In your eyes, BIL’s is good enough for you when you need the car to be collected but not good enough for you to return the favour by letting him use it while his car is being repaired.

You were the twats first. They’re being twats as a direct result of your twatty attitude.

@AnxiousRabbit

"OP and her DH are mostly annoyed because under the original plan they were paying for the car and hoping to get all the money back - at BILs expense."

Please explain your reasoning. Why would it be at BIL's expense?

@LostMyCar even said "We never expected or wanted BIL involved. He wasn't until he went with FIL to collect the car."

Your post was an hour or so after OP posted what I quoted- maybe you crossposted?

I think it depends on the bil tbh. One of mine I wouldn’t have a problem with. The other one I would. Sounds like fil spoils this particular bil and always has done and this is what’s behind it all.
Plus I don’t suppose it was for a couple of hours while he has a MOT done. He will be driving it about until the op and her dh come over.

you werent very nice, and they werent very nice
thats it

I cannot believe how close your experience is to ours! We too live o/s (not UK) and decided to buy a runabout for our multiple trips back to DH's home country. In the meanwhile we were happy that his parents had the use of 2 vehicles...

One visit when back we noticed a lot of damage to the car's paneling below the front end and one side of front wheel. It turns out In laws had lent the car to DH's sister and ''somehow'' no one noticed it came back damaged. We were never asked if the car could go over to hers, would have refused as she and her older sons had multiple infringements and loss of licences. No one ever made good the repairs either...

In another visit, we left some bags and our DD's baby seat in the car as we intended to head out later. I went into the garage to find FIL throwing our stuff out of the car! I pointed out to him we were going out again, and he said he needed the car to fit his gardening tools (it was a hatch back) and we could take the other one. He didn't consult with MIL if she had any engagements either and off he went.

Personally I think you are lucky you have your money back. Chalk this up to experience and when you get the other one, don't keep it at the In laws.

Also lol at you having no car

sorry. Serves you right

Lol at Bil winding it you up

It’s a cheap secondhand car !

Sorry but you were all a bit ott here (your bil just saying and then your dh kicking off) and it just took off from there. It’s insane (but brilliant in a mad genius way, I’m sorry but it is) that your fil did what he did. I’d say it will take your whole family some time to get over this though

How was fil supposed to drive 2 cars back?
Someone had to go with him to drive one of the cars back.
Unless it was a short walk away, but that doesnt stop Bil going along with fil.

As for the borrowing of the new car, I suppose if I wasnt asked, just told , it would get my back up. But not necessarily enough to start a row this huge.

I can't help but agree, and if OP and her DH make a fuss like this over every little thing I would find it extremely wearying.

FIL gets my support as well.

I'm on FILs side in all of this.

As pp have said, he did you a big favour. You keep saying he offered, but that doesn't detract from the fact that it was a favour.

You also keep saying that you never asked BIL to help but it sounds as if FIL needed his help.

I think it was very mean of your dh to say no in these circumstances and of course it was petty and inflammatory.

I love that FIL outmanoeuvred you and you now need to find another car without their help.

All the stuff about tinder dates just reinforces my view.

Sounds like everyone’s in the wrong to me.

How exactly did you expect FIL to collect it without BIL’s involvement?

Did your DH specify to his father that he didn’t want his brother driving the car before it was purchased?

Was the receipt, registered keeper, tax, insurance all in your/DH’s name? Or was it all in FIL’s name just funded by you both?

Regardless, FIL should not have kicked off in the way you describe. And if BIL drinks and drives then of course he’s an arsehole.

I’ll stand up for you on the basic concept of buying and selling on though - it can work out cheaper if you have the money up front to buy a decent car.

They didn't steal it! They facilitated the purchase, then reneged on the deal.

@BarcardiWithGadaffia This may have been a typo, but it's given me the best laugh I've had in ages.
😂

Put this right up there with Ripley's Believe it or Not. To basically steal your car, whether he paid you for it or not, is way out of bounds. I would not be involved with them again. I know it's your husbands family but I would still have nothing to do with them.

Mixed feelings. In a normal situation, after all the work fil and bil did doing you a big favour, why on earth couldn't they borrow the car for a bit while you aren't using it?

On the other hand there are fair reasons why you might not be comfortable. I've known someone who has a habit of having accidents, for example, and wouldn't get in their car with them let alone let them use mine.

FIL has paid you back in full so I'd just make other arrangements for a car at this point, that don't involve them.

Honestly this scenario is so bizarre.

You sound as bad as the BIL and FIL.

Oh give over, it was obvious from the OP that BIL can’t be trusted, OP said he “is an immature man child who is often reckless and verbally abusive when he doesn't get his own way. He can't hold down a job and FIL is constantly bailing him out of messy situations.”

Thus

Op how did you think FIL was going to collect the car without help? Magic Carpet?

Why is it OK for you to force the BIL to drive FILs car but not yours?

Your the people who want people to do you favours. It seems all take and no give.

I don't understand why people are saying you are the problem.

This isn't about the car specifically; it's about always having to facilitate BIL when he has been untrustworthy in the past. Why couldn't he borrow his FIL car, why couldn't he just chill while his MOT is done like the rest of the population?

Thats shit for you regarding the car- hopefully you can find another one as soon as you get back.

FIL & BIL sound like a pair of complete numbskulls.
I would keep all future interactions to a very surface level and never trust or rely on them with anything important.

I think you’re all as bad as each other