to LOATHE the word "Situationship"?

PyongyangKipperbang · 2024-05-14T23:40:37+00:00

Its nonsensical! Surely its "Going out with...." So you have Dating ( going on dates, maybe sleeping together but not exclusive), then Going Out With (not living together,but not seeing other people and developing/developed feelings), then Relationship (for me this is more than 6 months but less than 2 years because...) then Long Term Relationship (whether living together/married or not). Its a bloody stupid word. To me it would mean, if I had to define it, people who have ^been^ in a LTR but have to stay in their current arrangement for practical reasons, such a cant afford to run two homes or their house wont sell or similar. The first few times I read it, I assumed that that was what it meant and had to Google it. Probably going to be told IABU but it really bugs me!

Usernamesarenoteasy · 16/05/2024 10:43

PyongyangKipperbang · 15/05/2024 23:42

So from this thread I have go that a Situationship seems to mean two people having what is, on the surface, a normal BF/GF relationship but one wont/cant commit and the other doesnt have the self respct to say "OK" and walk away.

Situationship=desperately hoping that I will be the one they want to change their lives for, because I am forking over the sex with no demands but pretending I am cool with that, even though I am not.

And it is still a fucking stupid word.

I don't think that's what people are saying at all.....
It definitely doesn't describe my situation.

Marblessolveeverything · 16/05/2024 07:28

Well it is quite obvious your version is right because the idea that grown adults don't want the xyz of a relationship must be to do with low self esteem!

Eh no, I am very happy in my situationship, I am nearly 50 and I enjoy life on my terms only now. I don't want a relationship, I don't want anyone being brought into my teens life. I really don't want nor need exclusivity.

Why do you see sex as currency? I don't have sex to gain anything other than pleasure for me and the person with me. You describe a person as having as wanting more, that isn't my reality.

So I will be keeping the word because it describes my reality. Maybe consider how unhappy you must be if you are so judgemental on others choices.

CheekyHobson · 16/05/2024 01:08

ZenNudist · 16/05/2024 00:20

Yeah but this is like friends with benefits too.

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Friends with benefits suggests to me that everyone involved is generally happy with how things are.

Original poster

PyongyangKipperbang · 16/05/2024 00:25

Minimili · 16/05/2024 00:20

Maybe if things work out and you become exclusive and he’ll be your hubs/hubster!

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Vomit

OP posts:

ZenNudist · 16/05/2024 00:20

PyongyangKipperbang · 15/05/2024 23:42

So from this thread I have go that a Situationship seems to mean two people having what is, on the surface, a normal BF/GF relationship but one wont/cant commit and the other doesnt have the self respct to say "OK" and walk away.

Situationship=desperately hoping that I will be the one they want to change their lives for, because I am forking over the sex with no demands but pretending I am cool with that, even though I am not.

And it is still a fucking stupid word.

Yeah but this is like friends with benefits too.

Minimili · 16/05/2024 00:20

Verv · 15/05/2024 11:12

In a situationship with a fella and going on hollibobs with his famalam.

Get out.

Maybe if things work out and you become exclusive and he’ll be your hubs/hubster!

ZenNudist · 16/05/2024 00:18

I agree it's a silly word and not used by everyone to mean the same thing. I don't really know what it means apart from implies no affection and could easily be replaced by "just shagging".

OneTC · 16/05/2024 00:03

I saw it on here for the first time the other day and did puzzle over it. It sounds as convoluted as the situation it's presumably trying to convey

taylorswift1989 · 15/05/2024 23:59

valentinka31 · 15/05/2024 23:46

I think it's a great word.

You have a situation with someone. You are having sex or close to it with them. But for whatever potential myriad reasons, it can't translate (at the moment, if ever) into a publicly definable relationship. Maybe that's to do with one or the other's commitment, maybe life situation, whatever. It's complicated, but you like each other enough to be meeting and getting close.

I think it's cool there's a word to describe all that.

Nailed it.

I think it's a great word. No cap! I love how language evolves and is recreated.

dragonscannotswim · 15/05/2024 23:52

I think it's great! I love the words teens come up with for things. Very apt, generally!!

valentinka31 · 15/05/2024 23:46

I think it's a great word.

You have a situation with someone. You are having sex or close to it with them. But for whatever potential myriad reasons, it can't translate (at the moment, if ever) into a publicly definable relationship. Maybe that's to do with one or the other's commitment, maybe life situation, whatever. It's complicated, but you like each other enough to be meeting and getting close.

I think it's cool there's a word to describe all that.

Deathbyfluffy · 15/05/2024 23:45

lemonmeringueno3 · 15/05/2024 06:03

It was easier when you were asked on a date and thereafter were boyfriend/girlfriend until you lived together (partner) or got married.

Those days were much simpler!
These days everything just seems unnecessarily complicated. Cant stand it

Original poster

PyongyangKipperbang · 15/05/2024 23:42

So from this thread I have go that a Situationship seems to mean two people having what is, on the surface, a normal BF/GF relationship but one wont/cant commit and the other doesnt have the self respct to say "OK" and walk away.

Situationship=desperately hoping that I will be the one they want to change their lives for, because I am forking over the sex with no demands but pretending I am cool with that, even though I am not.

And it is still a fucking stupid word.

OP posts:

Perfectpots · 15/05/2024 18:59

Indeed. Only ever heard it spoken of by a 21 yr old friend of my DCs. She was regailing ppl with her love /sex life. 😒

DeeCeeCherry · 15/05/2024 18:50

Verv
In a situationship with a fella and going on hollibobs with his famalam
Get out
😂

CheekyHobson · 15/05/2024 18:14

beatrix1234 · 15/05/2024 11:30

casual relationships can be convenient and not everyone wants to get into a “serious relationship” with someone they’re having sex. By Stating that casual relationships are a sign of low self esteem you’re making a point that sex should only be conducive to marriage or monogamy. You must be religious, naive or quite narrow minded.

Edited

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No, you’re quite wrong. I have no issue with casual relationships, but the term “situationship” to me implies that one party wants more than they are getting yet are hanging around anyway.

For casual relationships where everyone is on board with them not going anywhere, we have the terms FWB or fuck buddies.

Neverdo · 15/05/2024 16:11

I don't think it's the same as "going out with" or "seeing someone". They both suggest early days of a realtionship that may develop.

A situationship is something far less posituve/healthy IMO.

Neverdo · 15/05/2024 16:09

I don't think it's a word I'd use out loud, but it does sum up that situation where you're "involved" with someone, would quite like it to go somewhere, know it won't, but also don't want to walk away.

SabreIsMyFave · 15/05/2024 15:53

Agree @PyongyangKipperbang 'Situationship' is a stupid word. I hate it too!

usernother · 15/05/2024 11:51

SwedishEdith · 15/05/2024 00:58

I quite like it and am surprised it's taken this long to become a word. It seems so obvious now it exists even though I'm not sure when it's meant to be used. I'd assume it's that stage when you're not quite sure if you're in a relationship yet. Or an affair.

We used to say you were 'seeing' someone before you'd been out enough times to move to the 'going out with' stage.

Scallops · 15/05/2024 11:49

P.S. I thought I was happily married! Was in denial.

Scallops · 15/05/2024 11:48

When I was happily married I felt so sorry for people having to go on the apps etc. and the idea of casual sex at my age repulsed me (no judgement of anyone else at all).

I've now been single 7 years and I only want a serious relationship leading to marriage (a happy one this time). But good single middle aged men are hard to find. If I didn't have the occasional fwb/"situationship" I'd never have sex. I've gone 2-3 years without it at a time and it's just awful and the hopelessness just grows.

Sorry for the ramble but I wanted to explain why, although it's very far from ideal for me, I will sometimes have casual sex. I'd rather meet a lovely man today to be with for the rest of my life.

beatrix1234 · 15/05/2024 11:30

CheekyHobson · 15/05/2024 10:59

I read “situationship” (or “It’s Complicated”) as “I have poor boundaries / low self-esteem”.

casual relationships can be convenient and not everyone wants to get into a “serious relationship” with someone they’re having sex. By Stating that casual relationships are a sign of low self esteem you’re making a point that sex should only be conducive to marriage or monogamy. You must be religious, naive or quite narrow minded.

KimberleyClark · 15/05/2024 11:16

Pieceofpurplesky · 15/05/2024 10:59

@OfcourseitsaNC sums it up perfectly.

If you are in a relationship then being exclusive should be the norm!

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I agree, but it’s all so complicated nowadays. I do think friends with benefits/fuck buddy situations are rarely completely even - more often than not one wants to be in a proper relationship and the other doesn’t.

RedPony1 · 15/05/2024 11:16

Agix · 15/05/2024 07:26

I thought situationship meant a sort of non-commital relationship, half romantic in nature, but with a bunch of angst and upset and confusion involved. Usually when one likes the other and would be with them, but the other just wants sex/attention, but hasn't exactly been open about that fact - yet continues to accept or invite the sex and attention. So they're just stuck in this weird limbo not going anywhere - cant really be described as "going out".

Looking at these posts, looks like I'm wrong 🤣

This is exactly how anybody i know would describe the word!!

I don't mind the term at all, but sad for anybody in one