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How do I stop my kids (2 and 4) running around / away from me ?

39 replies

gaddi · 13/05/2024 19:45

How do I actually do this ? I feel exposed when I am out alone with them. They think it's fun.

I avoid situations like this, but it happens sometimes, like at school pick up.

I braved going out to a pub for lunch alone with them yesterday. We sat in pickup benches and they got up a few times and thought it was hilarious to run around, away from me.

I had to chase them and just grab them both. It wasn't unsafe. But what if this happens on a road ?

The same thing happens today at pick up.

My 4 year old is fine on her own and doesn't run off, but when her brother starts doing it, she thinks it's hilarious and joins in.

I avoid this by putting the little one in the buggy. So maybe the answer is to just keep him firmly in there. I did this at the pub, until we had to go to the loo and he didn't want to sit in his buggy after.

anyway, before you start coming at me, we were at the pub at 12 pm, it was empty outside, so we didn't disturb anyone.

any advice ?

OP posts:
Elebag · 13/05/2024 20:07

Double buggy and reins.
The 4yo will settle down when they start school.

Elisabeth3468 · 13/05/2024 20:05

My 2 year old runs off and there's noway id attempt a pub meal on my own because it would just be stressful. He has to either a)hold my hand when walking
B) wear his reins
Sometimes he refuses both of those so option C) in the pram he goes.
He cries and screams when I get him in the pram but I try and reinforce that the choice is his.
I know he can't quite comprehend these choices maybe but I can't have him running in the middle of the road so this is what we do.

MargaretThursday · 13/05/2024 20:05

Reins and the buggy. And they're told that if they run off, the 2yo is in the buggy and the 4yo on reins.

Win both ways - if they like that, then they're safe and not running off; if they don't like it then they know how to avoid them.

fieldsofbutterflies · 13/05/2024 20:04

Strap little one in the buggy, or use reins on him.

toomuchfaff · 13/05/2024 20:04

Reins... Simple as that.

BeachHutsAndDeckchairs · 13/05/2024 20:03

Reins, a strict voice, a tight handhold and consequences for when they don't do as they're told. Set expectations clearly and regularly. Essentially it's the same as when you're at home and they misbehave.

pandarific · 13/05/2024 20:02

Just don’t do it to yourself, honestly. At those ages nothing is so hilarious. Soft play, buggy, a sticker book or something as a bribe for good behaviour will help, but… Otherwise - nope! Go out as a foursome (assuming you’re in a relationship) or moresome at the weekend.

Marcipex · 13/05/2024 20:01

Reins.

Cannotbeasked · 13/05/2024 19:59

I would use reins.

Screamingabdabz · 13/05/2024 19:57

You speak to them at eye level in a very quiet serious voice “we are now walking near a road and it’s very important that you hold mummy’s hand all the time.” (Praise praise praise all the time ‘well done holding mummy’s hand’ ’you are being such good children walking so sensibly” etc) Or…
“we are now going for a nice drink in the sun - would you like that? Well you need to be good children and walk nicely and sit when mummy tells you. Ok can you do that? Good, let’s go!” Praise, praise, praise. Etc

It’s about tone of voice, setting expectations and telling children, as the adult in charge, what’s going to happen and how it’s going to happen. Then you praise them when they do.

You don’t just take children somewhere and watch hopelessly when they act like excitable young children in a potentially dangerous situation. You take charge.

Maray1967 · 13/05/2024 19:54

You need reins.

Definitely for the two year old and I’d get a set for the four year old and warn they’ll be used if she runs off.

Take back control!!

gaddi · 13/05/2024 19:54

I take them out quite a bit for lunches and things like that. It's normally fine, if I make sure they're cornered in and the little one is unable to escape. It's also usually a quick thing. I can't allow them to get up from the table. Of course picknick benches is different and it was outside in open space etc. we've not done that before.

But even going to the playground with both of them is extremely stressful as they dart around in different directions and then start running off when I'm trying to get them to leave.

OP posts:
MagnetCarHair · 13/05/2024 19:49

I wouldn't go to a pub with two little kids unless I was there under duress for a family/friend get-together, unless it had a park for this very reason.

TeaKitten · 13/05/2024 19:48

Don’t bother with lunches out alone at those ages, it’s not necessary, if you must eat out do it at soft play where it’s ok if they run away. Pick your battles