This needs reporting so it can be investigated

So are you going to speak to someone about this or just let the rumours continue

@yesthatsmyactualname I can't decide where you heard about the 14 year olds staying over.

Well, you seem to be enjoying throwing his name around, speculating about it all yourself!

You need to raise it with the safeguarding lead for them to take the necessary steps.

if this is completely innocent he needs to be sat down and explained to him that whilst not illegal his activities are potentially not appropriate as there is a power imbalance, and inviting/allowing teenagers to stay over especially those under age is of course going to raise concerns and rumours.

going to Blackpool with an 18yr old is consenting adults UNLESS this young man was mentored by him for a number of years there isnt anything you can do.

I know where you are coming from OP.
Lots of recent reports about grooming of young teens/ young men in the nedia industry recently. And nobody seemed to "notice".
But I think you need to perceive these things first hand.
I would be direct with the people telling you about this: and what do you make of it? Do you suspect any possible grooming? Have you thought of it needing reporting? I would ask them direct questions.

I would always advise anyone with a child safeguarding query to contact NSPCC for advice.

I don’t dispute that a 30 year old in a relationship with an 18 year old is questionable, even though it isn’t illegal.

But OP didn’t drip-feed the allegations that he’s having young boys to stay over at his house until people didn’t jump on the “report him” bandwagon.

And the truth is that nobody knows. If it’s true then however is privy to this information needs to report him. No question. But it’s simply not ok to start rumours that this man is having young boys staying over without any basis other than that he took an 18 year old to Blackpool.

If there’s evidence then they need to present it, not sit gossiping about it

Staying over?

Report him. As an adult it is a duty to report your suspicions and this is inappropriate.

It may come to nothing but it’s best to err on the side of caution.

so he is a school teacher you are saying?

My DS, who is 23 would be "strongly advised" not to go to Blackpool with an 18 year old student he was working with. Regardless of sex or sexuality. Obviously it's entirely legal.

I hear what you are saying and I don't for one moment think that gay man=predatory paedophile.
This man took an 18 year old lad to blackpool for a weekend. Which is, of course, legal, Which many pps vehemently pointed out. However, on another recent thread regarding older men being interested in younger girls, there were howls of absolute outrage calling these men every shade of sleazy. So it seems to be a bit double standards to me!!!
Also if this man is allowing teenage boys to stay over at his flat, he is walking on very thin ice, however innocent it quite possibly is, onlookers will not see it that way.
Just like they would if it was teenage girls x

Noted, thank you 👍

@baroqueandblue For the avoidance of doubt, it is always misogynist to use the word "hysterical".

My apologies, I misinterpreted your comment on homophobia. Because my misinterpretation got my back up, I lashed out with the word 'hysteria', although I didn't mean that mysogynistically. (Men can be hysterical on MN sometimes too. Occasionally, I'm a case in point!)

Thank you for responding with tolerance, I really appreciate (and admire) that 🙏

Yes, some people were suggesting statutory rape is inherent to gay culture.

It isn't.

Hence why I'm shocked at SOME of the posts.

I don't think it's "hysterical" to be shocked at homophobia. I expect better from this forum.

Yes there were also reasonable posts.

*young not you.

@baroqueandblue you sound like a misogynist, there is no hysteria in her post.

I have read two memoirs recently, both by gay men, both describing brutal rapes when they were you and drunk and vulnerable. Both planned and from the way they did it, serial offenders. #metoo for gay men is only just beginning. Men rape, gay or straight. It's inherent to men and yes, yes #notallmen obviously.

Personally I think it's more homophobic to suggest that statutory rape is somehow inherent to gay culture. The hysteria in your tone is misplaced, there have been plenty of reasoned responses to this thread.

The thing is that it wasn’t so long ago that gay men were automatically tarred with the brush of being interested in young boys.

In my dad’s time his mum had a gay friend but it was made very clear that the boys were never to be alone with him because if he was interested in men then he was interested in boys, doesn’t matter if he wasn’t, that was the assumption.

Where I worked previously they had a gay man working in the attached nursery, and loads of the women didn’t want to put their sons in there because he was gay and so naturally had an interest in young boys/children.

I’m not saying that it couldn’t happen, but society has created this stereotype around gay men which suggests that they are naturally interest in, and therefore a danger to, young boys, and so when a rumour like this is spread it’s not beyond the realms of possibility that it could be born out of pure prejudice.

If people know that this is going on, then they need to report it. Not anonymously, if you’re prepared to spread around this kind of talk then you need to be prepared to put your name to it.

Any person I a position if power over a young person male or female that actively seeks a relationship with them is a predator . I would I report it , probably won’t end up in anything but his name will stay on record .
And people dismissing because it’s a man and young men wow ! If this was a man behaving in a Predatory way towards a young woman people would be replying different

Jfc at some of the replies here.

Gay kids deserve to be protected from predators too.

Personally I think it's more homophobic to accept statutory rape as being somehow inherent to gay culture.

Agree with PP about drama being an area where boundaries can blur. So extra extra important for any adult working with kids in drama to understand safeguarding.

I despair that as a society we never ever learn.

Go and speak to the person who told you about 14-year-olds sleeping over, tell them you are going to report him and give their name as a source if you’re not willing to do that then you’re just another gossip

Yes beautifully put. Although football is also pretty intense and emotional in a different way (I say that coming from an arts background). A coach or adult in any relationship to kids at that age needs to tread so carefully. This guy does not sound like he got that memo.

Why is he having teenage boys sleep over at his house? That really doesn't sound appropriate. I wonder at the parents allowing it