Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think some regressed memories be made up?

34 replies

LoveCherryTree · 12/05/2024 20:29

So, a friend was going through life all ok and then went to see a therapist, suddenly after a few sessions she’s had these regressed memories come flooding back, I believe she’s remembering things wrongly, but she won’t listen to me. And in some instances she believes something happened and I’ve proved 100% that it didn’t but she still won’t think that if she is imaging things that aren’t true then maybe she should be questioning the therapy.
she told me that her therapist is a man hater and other personal things, isn’t it unprofessional for a therapist to portray any of this or any personal information?
I feel like my friend is ruining her life and yet she doesn’t question any of it, she just wants to think these things happen and that’s the end of it. She thinks a friend of my parents abused her when she was young, but again, it just isn’t possible when she said it happened, she could ruin this man’s life for no reason. I’m just after some advise?

OP posts:
BoundaryGirl3939 · 12/05/2024 20:44

My sister in law same the same thing about her dad. Her sisters were very angry and said that their dad was not an abuser and that she was making it up or imagining it.

She also went on to say that my brother was a paedophile, had abused their daughter and was running a sex ring in his school. All of the was said out of badness, and she later had to officially retract because the claims were so ludicrous. She thought she would be instantly believed and my brother kicked out of house.

Some people are mad, some people are bad. I don't believe everything I hear anymore.

Sis in law was later diagnosed as having bipolar but if her claims had not been so far fetched, she may have been believed. Its so dangerous out there, especially for innocent men.

YankSplaining · 12/05/2024 20:44

I can’t speak as to your friend, but there have definitely been “repressed memories” that never really happened. Once I watched an episode of some investigative show in which everyone in a woman’s group therapy claimed that her dad had sexually abused them when they were children. The problem was, she hadn’t met any of these people until well into adulthood, several US states away from where her dad lived. They claimed he traveled to abuse them, when he never had the time or money to go on a trip out of state. There was no evidence he’d ever met these people.

LoveCherryTree · 12/05/2024 20:43

ThisKookyBlueSnake · 12/05/2024 20:41

You can get false memories. You can be so convinced something has happened but it hasn't.

I think she is mixing memories and coming up with a complete fabricated story.

OP posts:
LoveCherryTree · 12/05/2024 20:42

atticstage · 12/05/2024 20:39

That doesn't actually prove anything.

It does if you know both people. And when one of them is making things up and is remembering things out of the blue then there is definite questions to it all.

OP posts:
ThisKookyBlueSnake · 12/05/2024 20:41

You can get false memories. You can be so convinced something has happened but it hasn't.

atticstage · 12/05/2024 20:39

LoveCherryTree · 12/05/2024 20:38

Because she said someone else was there and it happened to them and that person has said in no uncertain terms, it did not happen. For context, the friend is very much me, me, me.

That doesn't actually prove anything.

atticstage · 12/05/2024 20:38

Memory is complex and poorly understood.

Your line about "ruining" a man's life is a cliche that makes your op less credible.

What qualifications does the therapist have? Why did you decide to post about your friend online?

LoveCherryTree · 12/05/2024 20:38

Tagyoureit · 12/05/2024 20:35

How are you so positive the abuse didn't happen? I don't want to be goady but if she said oh this happened with details, then can you be sure?
Or did say this happened at Xmas 1992 and you know for a fact he was out the country or something?

Because she said someone else was there and it happened to them and that person has said in no uncertain terms, it did not happen. For context, the friend is very much me, me, me.

OP posts:
Tagyoureit · 12/05/2024 20:35

How are you so positive the abuse didn't happen? I don't want to be goady but if she said oh this happened with details, then can you be sure?
Or did say this happened at Xmas 1992 and you know for a fact he was out the country or something?

Swipe left for the next trending thread