Otherhalf asking parents to temporarily move in?

What bloody cheek. Id say absolutely not. This type of thing would make me reconsider my relationship.

You say you would probably have agreed if he'd discussed it with you first - but WHY???!! Why would you have agreed to it? He expects you to do all the caring! Your home is your place of work and there's no way you can have extra adults in the home when you are caring for children. It should have been a no even if he asked nicely, the fact that he didn't even ask, just assumed, and is now annoyed with you for saying no to doing all the care for his parents would make me reconsider the relationship entirely.

You are correct in your last sentence - he does not have any consideration for you or your work. He just expects you to drop everything since you are at home already?! Does he think you do absolutely nothing in your job as a childminder?

If he's that worried about his parents, tell him he can go move in with them until they are well enough.

It's definitely not going to be temporary.

This level of disrespect would have me reevaluating my relationship. Is this normal for your relationship?

Good points.

Why can't he move in with them, he works from their house when necessary and also they get professional carers in their home as necessary?

Why is it he's just getting the nearest female to take on, unasked, all the mental load and physical care for his parents, on top of her having a full time job just because the professional job you do is in your home?

Don't even take this on on a trial basis OP. It will be much harder, if even possible, getting them to leave again. 🌹

Decent parents wouldn't do this to their DC. If they're willing to do so it says a lot about them.
What were their plans for coping as they aged?

He is effectively asking you to give up your job. There is no way I would send my child to a childminder who us concurrently caring for some random ( from a client's perspective) adults!

Agree with this. Have you said yes?

Once they've moved in they'll never leave

This.

He's got some nerve expecting you to nurse his parents without consulting you and jeopardising your job. That would be a massive no from me. Tell him to move in with mummy and daddy and look after them for a few weeks.

and there is no way your families would agree to you saying as well as looking after your child I’m caring for two elderly people. That’s two jobs. I’d say politely ‘it sounds like you won’t have that much time for our children and I’ll give notice now thank you.’

*caring for them not him

Absolutely not. He jeopardises your job and is planning on you caring for him? Pack him a bag and he can go stay with them. He can sleep on their sofa, your job is safe and he is the one who will be caring for them. Has he never respected you really op?

He is completely unreasonable to have not taken your work into account. Would his parents even want to spend their days around your childminding business, as well as completing DBS checks? If you are working you aren't available to provide care for his elderly parents. Could you afford not to work, would you want to give up work to become a carer? These are discussions you need to have before he makes any offer to have them move in.

Why is he assuming that you will be able to drop everything? You have a job and running a childminding business from home means having houseguests is very inconvenient. The fact that he didn't discuss this with you first and make a decision together speaks volumes about how he views your relationship 😳 I would be telling him to move in with his parents temporarily so he can look after them!

WTAF!!! HIS parents HIS responsibility. Too disruptive for your business as you have already described. Insane idea.

I'm sorry but I'd have to tell him he needs to in invite them. If he's that worried he can go and live with them at their house for a bit.

Mind blown. He expects you- unmarried, so no financial protection- to give up your job to care for his elderly parents? To become a domestic carer, for free? In your own home? Would he still expect you to pay your half of the bills etc? This plan is so incredibly ridiculous and selfish. One has to significantly question the sense, attitude and love of your partner.

Ah, one of those lively men who think that being a childminder (or nursery worker) just has a lovely time playing with children all day...

He has no respect for your job, or indeed for your role in the home. Of course you can drop everything for his parents, you don't really need an office and your job? Hey just plays with kids all day.

I would tell him that he leaves before they move in. He has absolutely no right to move anyone into your home without consulting you and offer you up as an unpaid carer.

Your husband certainly should have asked you first but he seems not to realise that you have a job, a responsible one, that you do from home. With the best will in the world it will be unbelievably difficult to cater for his parents while you have young children underfoot - and they have to come first as it is your livelihood.

He hasn't thought it out. Show him this thread and he may realise what a problem it would be.

There is of course the possibility that his parents may think it isn't a good idea. Let's hope so.

Yeah I wouldn't be sending my kid to a childminder who is also providing live in care to frail elderly people.

How tolerant are they going to be of the children?
I've chosen my kids care based on your values and how you will interact with them. Your PILs are unlikely to follow the same mindset about how we treat children nowadays.
How will you care for both at the same time?
How will you take the kids out?
What if one of them is injured/ill/falls?
What about all the bugs kids carry around, am I gonna be guilt tripped becuase my snotty kid gave your MIL pneumonia?
What happens if it actually is great, then one of them dies?

Yet another fucking man outsourcing a womans labour without asking her.

Suggest he accommodates his parents at his place of work and looks after them there.
How would that go?

He's asking for demanding huge sacrifice of time, energy and perhaps money from you.
He is unreasonable and needs to rethink.

Oh honey, how sweet you are worried about your parents! What a shame they can’t stay here! Even if you could get leave of absence from work, could we afford it? And some of the families might refuse, so we’d lose that money too. Obviously we’d need to completely rearrange the house, I’m not sure where we’d all sleep.

Of course it won’t happen for ages, because DBS the checks will take a while. And cost a bit, too.

I know, you can go and stay with them! That will help!