Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not feel guilty about maternity leave colleague

255 replies

NinePumpkins · 10/05/2024 23:19

I have been off work due to chronic illness since November of last year - actually, my cancer was diagnosed just after I started in this job about 4 years ago, so my whole employment has been blighted by my illnesses (cancer now in remission, other stuff going on). Nevertheless, I enjoy the job when I'm able to do it - it's an administrative position.

Recently, redundancy proposals were announced at my company, and in my team the other 2 administrators at the level above and below me were put at risk. My role is to be continued. I've now heard it on the grapevine that one of the others, currently on maternity leave, is annoyed about the whole situation, and frustrated that we weren't all put in a pool for redundancy?? I'm sorry she's heard the news while on mat leave and sure that it's stressful, but I'm confident I can return to my position. AIBU for not feeling guilty about it? I'm not sure when I'm going to be able to return, and am currently on unpaid sick leave, but I know things will ultimately be resolved.

OP posts:
DoreenonTill8 · 10/05/2024 23:39

CuttingMeOpenthenHealingMeFine · 10/05/2024 23:23

I’m not sure she will expect you to feel guilty tbh she is allowed her feelings and they don’t impact you the same as yours don’t impact her.

I just wouldn’t worry about it. Good luck with your recovery.

This will no doubt turn into a ‘woman on maternity leave thinks the world revolves around her how horrible and entitled’ even though there is not the slightest bit of evidence that it’s the case.

This, are you telling other people she's being horrible and making you feel guilty without any evidence?

loropianalover · 10/05/2024 23:36

No, you don’t have to feel guilty. Her feelings and panic are understandable but it doesn’t mean that you have to carry guilt about it.

CelesteCunningham · 10/05/2024 23:29

You don't need to feel guilty and I doubt she wants you to feel guilty, but it's reasonable for her to be annoyed that the whole team isn't being considered for redundancy.

A friend of mine was told she was at risk of redundancy while on maternity leave - she thought her boss was ringing her to congratulate her on her brand new baby, but instead she was told her job was at risk. She stayed in that job another ten years but never really got over it in truth and it ruined her maternity leave. Cut your colleague some slack.

ToxicChristmas · 10/05/2024 23:25

You shouldn't feel guilty as the situation isn't of your making, but I understand why she is upset and probably very worried. It's a big thing.

CuttingMeOpenthenHealingMeFine · 10/05/2024 23:23

I’m not sure she will expect you to feel guilty tbh she is allowed her feelings and they don’t impact you the same as yours don’t impact her.

I just wouldn’t worry about it. Good luck with your recovery.

This will no doubt turn into a ‘woman on maternity leave thinks the world revolves around her how horrible and entitled’ even though there is not the slightest bit of evidence that it’s the case.