To feel I don’t send my child to enough extra curricular activities?

With several of the clubs that aren't school ones it takes us 15 minutes to walk there, 15 minutes back, and the same on pick up and the class only lasts an hour. Doesn't really buy us any time for us!

At the moment my seven year old son is doing 6- but he asked for them all. No clubs on Thursdays and Sundays and several are straight after school. But two terms ago he asked to take a break from all but the drama and beavers and that was ok too.

DD is 6 and does 7 activities a week. Three are on her school site so I just collect her later. DH does 2 weekend ones. I need to transport her to 2 other activities, one of which is a pain to travel to, but it offers superior teaching to local options so it's worth it.

She's always had plenty of energy, did loads of classes as a preschooler and has never been too tired after school or with busy weekends, so we've just gone with it. I'm a sahm so I don't have to juggle it with working hours, and the cost isn't a problem. She doesn't go to any childcare so she has plenty of free time at home, she comes up with wonderful imaginative play and craft projects of her own accord.

I expect she'll reduce them as she gets older and needs to focus on academics (she's at a prep and will take the 11+). And I've been aware of that and that's why I want to get things like her swimming and music levels up to a certain level at a younger age, because it will be harder to fit it in with tutoring and increased homework.

I work flexibly, school hours, and we only have one child so yes, can pretty much do what we want activity wise.

It can be quite expensive too & luckily we have everything on our doorstep. The only travel is to swimming.

@Lostthetastefordahlias I work p/t & DH is hybrid. Couldn’t do it with f/t jibs & commutes.

How do so many people do all this in the week in a practical sense - do you have school hours / v flexible jobs?

Swimming, gym/martial arts, and brownies/beavers here. Plus an instrument each learned in school.

I found a lot of parents did it to have their DC out of the house and out of their hair.

That's your assumption/opinion. Its probably not their sole reason.

I haven't counted a couple of school based clubs, these are free & almost an extension of school/replace wraparound. Coding & cricket.

So we started off with swimming. Basic life skill, essential - dont regard this as optional. Just once a week normal lesson.

Then eldest wanted me to teach him a bit of the instrument i play. Fine, it was a nice thing to do together, did this a few months. But then he wanted proper lessons (its v hard to teach your own child!!).

Then both wanted to join an informal group lesson in the sport DH plays. They love this & go with DH, its something they enjoy doing together.

Then youngest started a dance class with her best friend. Its a short walk from home, its very chilled and she loves it.

To be honest, it keeps them off screens and they often choose to go and practise etc, plus they love the social element, both have friends at all their activities.

Eldest is really proud of being able to play an instrument, its great for his confidence.

8 year old does four clubs a week (and football matches on a weekend 😭)
6 year old does 3 clubs a week. Luckily some (like swimming) overlap. It’s expensive and exhausting for me, but they love them and regularly ask to do more

Mini blondes 7 does 2. Swimming and gym

That's enough as

1. costs me £30 a week
2. shes tired and needs some down at home time /play dates
3. has slot of homework reading maths spelling every day

What @SalmonEile said. 4DC, 2 do plenty and would do more given half a chance, one does nothing (older, more schoolwork), youngest does 1 or 2 but mainly at weekend. He does completely different stuff to his brother who would happily play football everyday given half a chance and LOVES scouts.

All different, all have plenty of choice and choose accordingly.

My dc go to no after school - one has a disability and we can't afford it anyway. They're still happy and well-adjusted kids. They don't need organised clubs and activities to have a good childhood.

I'm out of that stage now, but when my DC were doing their clubs I capped it at 3 max per week of which one had to be at the weekend. They got tired, I needed us to eat dinner as a family regularly, and frankly I wasn't going to tear myself in half rushing them hither and thither. It all tails off ultimately anyway when homework and friends arrive. They soon hone their interests and to focus on one, max 2 things (only one can really be done to a really high standard once they get to GCSEs).

I found a lot of parents did it to have their DC out of the house and out of their hair. Another adult was dealing with them, they'd only have to provide a rushed dinner, bath and then straight to bed. Way easier than a bored or whining child.

My DD did lots because shes an only child with no cousins and it allowed her to be with other children. She's flitted between different activities over the years and most have had transferable skills that move from one to the other.

Some activities you need to get out the way when at Primary school to open doors later. We live by the coast, DD being a competent swimmer was essential not just as a life skill but so she could enjoy the other watersports available in our area.

At Primary age if your child tries lots of activities then when they move to Secondary they'll have a great idea of what they don't like and what they do and what they want to focus on. These hobbies can then extend into lifelong interests and even be built into career choices.

There is plenty of time in the year to just 'be', teen DD plays rugby and we have the best part of the summer off as it's a winter sport. School holidays classes are often cancelled or extra holiday workshops put on which is useful as a heater version of childcare for those that need it.

I don’t think you have to send them to more clubs, but the 8 year old would possibly benefit from doing a little more depending on what they do at home when they don’t have clubs.

My kids only did one club each at that age but we did a lot with them and they spent their evenings learning to cook, writing stories, building Minecraft worlds, reading, learning to code and build circuits, etc. and the weekends we normally went out for a day trip at least once. Clubs would have been easier but transport was difficult.

I try to keep a balance...DS6 does swimming (non negotiable) plus Karate and Beavers. I would say no to anything else as I feel that's enough. DD3 does toddler ballet-style class.

We do a lot as a family though, days out, weekends away, trips, shows, theatre and I prioritise family time doing this on a weekend.

Extra curricular activities can end up being extremely important if your child encounters friendship issues at school.

All 4 of mine do tennis once a week. They do it over 2 different days. I can't be at 4 activities at once. They all enjoy it, so it's enough

Filling their week with an activity every single night means they don't learn how to manage their free time. And that can cause problems of its own.

I don’t think that’s true, A club could be 1 hr before or after school, plenty of free time left.

Every child is different and depends on family situation

If you work full time and not getting kids in the house until 6.30 then one evening activity is more than enough

I think a lot of parents do extra curricular to reduce screen time. Problem is indoor entertainment is so good now that children just spend their time on screens all the time. Extra curricular stuff means kids spend less time on screens.

My DS8 currently does 6 extracurricular activities - 4x sport (swimming lessons, karate, basketball and multi sports - the latter is a free school run after school club, the others all paid for) amd 2x music lessons (1 in school time, one outside of school). It does feel like a lot tbh, he is an only so financially it is fine, and he wants to do them all. But I think it’s likely we’ll probably drop one of the music lessons and swimming in the next year or two, which will make it more manageable.